672 - Childhood Friend of the Zenith

The world-renowned genius's childhood friend, Chapter 672 > Northern Rabbit - Web Novel Archive My life has been like a long, unending tunnel. Not a shred of light, so dark I couldn't even see an inch ahead. I had come too far to even consider turning back. It was a journey where hope of an end was non-existent. Relentlessly, I walked, and walked again. When I stumbled, I stood up and just kept on going. When fear of the darkness gripped me, making me tremble uncontrollably, I suppressed it and continued on. That was how I lived. Or was it even living? I asked myself and answered in the same breath. When questions arose, I responded. I just did what had to be done because someone had to do it. But then, I would question myself again. Was it really justifiable to say it had to be done? Did any sense of righteousness or conviction exist in those actions? '…' I had no answer. Because I couldn't. I knew it. That nothing of that sort existed within me. When did I start dreaming of consensus? I never did. I neither possessed nor ever desired it from the beginning. Then, what was my righteousness? Why did I live that life? I was swept away by the rushing currents, unable to resist. I tried to excuse it with that reasoning. I had no choice. It was the best I could do. If not, I would die. Therefore, I had to do it. That was how I justified it. 'Really?' If I were to ask again, the answer was predetermined. 'No.' It was all self-justification. If I hadn’t entered the tunnel in the first place, none of it would have happened. I knew, yet I willingly walked in. Why? Because there was no other place to run. I entered like that and endlessly searched. For the one who pushed me into it, that is. I needed someone to blame for pushing me into that tunnel, for why I lived like this. Even when I shivered in fear within the darkness. When I walked aimlessly, unable to find hope. When I crumpled down, exhausted, and cried out. I sought someone to blame. I knew. That there was no one to blame, I already knew. Only. I couldn't accept, so I needed someone to blame. That was how my life was. Rushing into it, as if fleeing, but never reaching the end, a life faded away within the darkness. A life like vermin that died fleeing without ever seeing light. I lived like that, and died, and returned. I never thought of it as a miracle. Because it wasn't anything I had hoped for, I feared to openly welcome it. I just received it, so I lived on. This time, let's live a slightly different life. I'll bury myself in the mountains where no one knows, where even mice and birds are unaware. That's how I lived, thinking. 'It didn’t go as planned, did it.' Truly, nothing happened the way I wanted. The whirlwind I couldn’t stop swept me up once more. By the time I opened my eyes, I found myself at the eye of the storm. 'Was it something I couldn’t avoid after all?' Was fate, something that mere humans couldn’t withstand? In the end, would it inevitably sweep me up in a maelstrom? Then, what should I do? I. What should I do? 'What are you pondering?' 'I' said. 'Just make sure it doesn’t turn out that way.' If you can't avoid being swept away. Make the storm blow softer. Or, make sure the wind doesn’t blow at all. Wouldn't that work? SSSH-! Heat rises. The boiling emotions affect my eyes. Energy infuses my body. There’s an omen ahead. An omen that, left unchecked, will become the wind to sweep me up. Not only me but also become a typhoon that will shake the entire world. Therefore, I must consume it before it erupts. I must deal with it now before it becomes a greater catastrophe. For what purpose? To replace the position of the Divine Sword. ‘To save the world in the end….’ ... ... Save the world? ‘Me?’ CRUNCH--!! BANG-! The greed (貪) that was flying towards the Heavenly Demon veered off course and crashed into a nearby tree. Ssshhh…. Turning into mist because greed does not inflict direct damage other than authority, it scattered. I, having adjusted the angle of the greed, stared at the Heavenly Demon with my body still as a board. “Hoo... Huff... Hoo.” Breath, imbued with heat, flowed out rough and uneven. My body was burning with emotions that filled me to the brim. “Haa... Huff...” I repeatedly took deep breaths, covering my forehead with my hand. Something felt off. Saving the world. My body tensed at the thought my own mind had created. “Phew... Hoo...!” I cooled my stiffening head beyond my harsh breaths. ‘Me, saving the world?’ For reasoning, it was too confined. 'Save something, who’s saving what.' To kill the Heavenly Demon to save the world. To replace the position of the Divine Sword and save the world. Acts done under such pretexts. But. ‘Do I even have the right?’ With a slight movement. The thought slipped through my grasp. “…Haa.... Ha…” I forgot what my originally returned purpose was. ‘Live by running away moderately.’ That was my objective. To flee from the deeds I committed and escape the impending doom, living quietly. That was undoubtedly the goal. Yet as situations twisted and entangled, didn't my thoughts change? Having something to protect, I sought to prevent a bloodbath. That was how it started. I resolved to act by any means necessary for what must be protected. I convinced myself that way. I do not hesitate to take a life. I capture criminals from past lives and make them demons. Most were to be used and disposed of eventually. Some were to be discarded after use or used as shields. Though deeds chosen against the doomed, they were never righteous. I realized that long ago, but it didn’t matter. I have long abandoned regrets and threw away guilt. That’s how I prepared, yet. Is this work truly to save the world? ‘Perhaps.’ The intended purpose might suggest so. But. ‘Do I really think it's for that?’ Working to save the world. Did I ever honestly think so? It sends shivers through me. ‘Where did I start derailing?’ The mere thought I created suffocated me. Don’t I already know? That I have no interest whatsoever in saving the world. That's merely an added bonus. ‘Who cares if this world falls apart?’ When did I start thinking I was some kind of hero? Something felt fundamentally wrong. As my heated mind gradually cooled, the clarity returned to my eyes. Only then did I see it. Drip—. There she was, the Heavenly Demon, looking at me with eyes filled with a sense of melancholy, blood trickling from the corners of her lips. Those eyes bothered me. Was it the damned similarity in the gaze? That made it all the more unsettling. Yet deep inside, a question emerged. ‘This woman dripping with blood...’ Is she truly the calamity you envision? ‘If not a calamity, then what?’ I held onto the thought firmly. The only reason I hesitated was because she bore such a resemblance to Wi Seora. Surely that must be it. A method to kill the Heavenly Demon. No, rather, I felt a flicker of hope that I could indeed kill her. My greed could even consume the power of the Heavenly Demon. That certainty filled me. In that case, I should rush forward and devour her without hesitation. "Why didn't you dodge?" My mouth addressed the Heavenly Demon with this question. "..." "You could have dodged it easily. Why didn't you?" The barrier was broken. Thus, the Heavenly Demon suffered some impact from the catastrophe, but it was something she could have easily avoided. Yet she hadn’t. Earlier too, she was dragged into something she didn’t need to be involved in, and she took all my attacks without retaliating. "You weren't planning to just take it, were you?" My greed charged towards the Heavenly Demon’s barrier. She must realize if she sees it. That my greed was capable of devouring her barrier. As the shattered barrier of the Heavenly Demon began to regenerate, it became clear. It seems breaking it completely is impossible, but it's clear that an opportunity can be created. And yet, instead of dodging my greed, she just stood and watched it approach. "Why didn't you dodge? Did you think it wouldn't defeat you?" "..." "Answer me. What are you thinking?” "Because it seemed like that's what you wanted." "What?" To my rough question, the Heavenly Demon responded calmly. "You seemed uneasy. Like you wanted to do this. So, that's why I stayed." "What are you talking about? Answer straight...” "Isn’t that so?" She tilted her head, and for a moment, I had no words. But only for a moment. "Then, are you trying to let me kill you?" If I intended to attack, and she allowed it because of it. If she dragged herself here because I wanted it, and took my attacks without resisting. Would she die now because I intend to kill her? To such a question, the Heavenly Demon answered promptly. "You wouldn’t have killed me." To that odd certainty, I gritted my teeth. "That's ridiculous. So what, was all that I did, mere child's play?" Did my desperate attempts to kill seem like a joke? How could she have such unfounded confidence? "You wouldn’t have done it." "Why are you so sure?" "I don't know. Just feel like it. Besides." The Heavenly Demon wiped away the last of the blood from her lips with her sleeve. "My sister told me not to fight recklessly." “…Ha.” Fshhhh—! A flame surged at my fingertips. I employed an attack with compression and spin, far more intense than when I first used it. It's the limit of what I can confine and control. Thirty percent of my total energy. Considering the Saint's Spear I used earlier was ten percent, this was thrice that amount. "Do you think I can't kill you?" A ridiculous statement. Especially since standing before me is the Heavenly Demon herself. No matter the differences in appearance and aura from my past memories, It doesn’t change the fact that she instigated the bloodbath in my previous life. And to stand before such a person thinking I can’t kill her? "Cut the nonsense." I leveled the completed Saint's Spear at the Heavenly Demon. "If you're not going to resist, just stay put. It'll make things easier." Don’t get swayed by that guise. "I'm going to kill you here and now." "..." Despite my warning, the Heavenly Demon remained unresponsive. She only looked at me with those amethyst eyes. Always with that same reaction. “Fine, let’s see how long you can keep not dodging…” “No.” Stop. As I was about to move, her unexpected words momentarily froze me. No? "What do you mean, suddenly?" "I am not ‘you.’" What kind of nonsense is this? With a scowl, I furrowed my brows. "My name isn’t... something like ‘you’..." The Heavenly Demon, who seemed about to reveal something, suddenly clammed up. A sense of frustration settled across her otherwise impassive face. 'name?’ The name of the Heavenly Demon. Didn't Gu Heebi call her Yeon or something earlier? Is that what she means? Wait, did she ever have a name, to begin with? She called herself the Heavenly Demon. Never uttered anything else. "What’s your name?" "..." I asked, but the Heavenly Demon remained silent. If she said she wasn't it, she must have a name to speak. But then. “I don’t know. I can’t remember.” Biting her lip in frustration, she spoke. “…What was my name?” And then she, unexpectedly, looked at me and asked.