69話 今の気持ち - I Was Cheated on by My Girlfriend but My Devilish Junior Now Yearns for Me
"This is too delicious." The words of admiration escaped my lips the moment I took a bite. With each additional bite, a sense of happiness bubbled up from deep within me. The dish Ayaka had prepared was gratin. I couldn't remember the last time I had homemade gratin. Our lunches always had gratin when we were young, but those were of course frozen. As delicious as the frozen gratin was despite its convenience, it simply couldn't compare to Ayaka's creation. The only edge frozen gratin had was that I could check my daily fortune after finishing it. As I took another mouthful of gratin, I couldn't help but smile, forcing me to momentarily set down the spoon on the plate. "It's just too good. I need a better vocabulary." "Nobody's expecting a food review from you anyway,” she replied. Even as she said it, Ayaka's expression was one of satisfaction. "So, what do you think? Changed your opinion of me?" "Changed my opinion? How so?" When I gave her a puzzled look, Ayaka pointed her spoon at me and spoke. "It's been ages since you last had my cooking, right?" As I recalled, it had indeed been since high school. I've never had the chance to enjoy her freshly prepared dishes like this. But it's not like I ever underestimated her cooking. The food she shared with me during high school was delicious, and the meat and potatoes she handled in home economics was so popular the boys would fight over it. "I always expected it to be great, but this is beyond that. It's amazing." Hearing my response, Ayaka gave me a flat look. "That's such the perfect reply, it's annoying." "Isn't that a bit unfair?" Ayaka wavered her spoon in front of me as if contemplating her next move, then finally scooped up some of her own gratin. She nodded to herself while chewing. "Yeah, I think I did pretty well." "Is it good?" "I made the white sauce from scratch, so it's flavored to my liking. I'm glad it suits your taste." I remembered her cooking preparations earlier, putting butter into the frying pan. She must have been making the white sauce after that, though I hadn't realized it at the time since it isn't my area of expertise. "You really went all out, didn't you?" "Of course. I wanted you to taste delicious food." Hearing her words, I paused with my spoon mid-air. I returned the spoonful of gratin to the plate and gave her a searching look. Realizing what she just said, Ayaka blinked a few times, a faint blush coloring her cheeks. "I didn’t mean anything special by it." "Really?" "N-not at all." "Ah, got it. I thought there might be more to it." "...Just to be clear, what do you mean?" Ayaka asked, her face a mix of expressions. I answered while savoring another mouthful of gratin. "I thought maybe it was a play on words, like ‘want you to taste delicious food’." "That’s completely ridiculous, you idiot!" And with that, Ayaka swiped the remaining shrimp from my plate and began eating them at a furious pace that would surprise even Shinonhara. Not sure what misunderstanding had occurred, I decided I should tread carefully and chewed slowly. Though the shrimp was gone, the gratin remained delicious. Its creamy flavor spread through my mouth, warming me to my core. When Ayaka went to refill our teas from the fridge, I snuck back a few shrimp and quickly devoured them. Now, there was no evidence left. "Hey, do you want a drink?" "Yeah, I'd love one." With that, Ayaka returned with two cans of beer from the fridge. We opened them with a pop, cans clinking together. "Cheers…" I started to say but stopped short. "What’s wrong?" "We can’t. We drove here today." Forgetting herself as well, Ayaka quickly put down the can she'd handed me with a sheepish "Oops." "Sorry, I got carried away just chatting like usual." "Darn, I really wanted a drink too." Ayaka had prepared not just the homemade gratin but also a large dish with salad and store-bought sashimi. The thought of enjoying all this with a drink made me let out an involuntary sigh. "Maybe next time, then." She said, placing the beer back in the fridge. Since she'd already opened them, she'd probably end up drinking them herself. "When would next time be, anyway?" Despite having known each other for so long, it was the first time I'd ever had a meal in her home. Even today felt like a whimsical decision of hers. When I'd get another chance depended entirely on Ayaka's mood. With a sense of being teased, I let out a small "Aw." "If you let me know ahead of time, you can come over whenever you like." Contrary to my expectations, Ayaka said this with a smile. "Really, anytime?" "As long as you give me a heads up." "…Really? Why now?" "Why are you so suspicious?" Ayaka asked with a wry smile as she resumed her seat. She handed me servings of sashimi and salad on a small plate. While adding soy sauce to the sashimi, I explained. "It's just that, after never being in your home before, suddenly being told I can come anytime is surprising. I'm not actually doubting you." "But you’re here now, aren’t you? The present is everything. How do you feel about it now?" "Well—" I wanted to come again. No guy wouldn't feel that way after being treated so warmly. What held me back was the fear that entering her home might change our relationship. —A conflict I've faced from time to time. It's because I'm satisfied with how things are that I have these doubts. If our relationship changes, it might not necessarily be for the better for us. My relationship with Ayaka is something I can't compare to anything else, which makes it all the harder to decide. So, I can't seem to shake off the idea of maintaining the status quo. However, thinking about it again, that seems like a rather rigid mindset. If I truly didn't want to change my relationship with Ayaka at all, I would've declined our onsen trip altogether. Accepting that invitation might be the surest evidence that, deep down, I hoped for a positive change. I don't know exactly what a good relationship for us both entails. But there's one thing I'm certain of. If I choose to accept her invite to visit more often, there's no way I'll regret having more time together. If that's the case, the conclusion is simple. As Ayaka said, what matters is how I feel now. "Alright, then I'll occasionally come over for a meal. Looking forward to it." I want to spend more enjoyable moments with Mino Ayaka. Until we become working adults, I want to spend the limited time we have left doing what I love. That's how I feel right now, and it's what should take precedence. "Living honestly makes one happier anyway. More gratin, please! And tomorrow, let's have croquettes!" "That's just being too spoiled!" Ayaka playfully tapped my shoulder. Despite her words, her expression seemed softer than usual. When our eyes met, I suddenly felt an overwhelming sense of embarrassment, and I quickly stuffed my mouth with salad to hide it.