93 - Upki Girl

< Make it Strong, Please > ―Did you actually kneel? "Pft, yeah." ―Wow, you must’ve gone through a lot. Those guys are completely nuts. Did you tell the manager? "I messaged him since he was in a meeting with the Replay author. Yeom, if Seowon and Lia don't mend their ways, we're in deep trouble. It's a relief it was A-Tension this time; imagine if it had been someone like Kim Seok-won. Gives me chills just thinking about it." ―I’ll talk to the kids. There's a limit to craziness... "That's why, I need a break. Can you handle the kids' schedule for about three days?" ―I can cover for you, but what’s your plan? Without you around, the kids might not feel great. We start shooting the reality show today. "I know the show is important, but I need to take care of myself, right? Today I'm just too furious to keep it in. For once, I understood why people might think about hitting. If not for the recording, I’d have kicked them to the curb and disappeared by now." ―Heh, I get it. You've seemed on edge lately. You've been nonstop for so long; maybe you need a getaway. "Yeah, I need to clear my head, or I might literally explode from stress. I'll talk to the others separately. Let’s keep this from Seowon and Lia. In fact, let everyone else at work think I’ve quit." ―So it's just between you, me, and the manager? "Hyun-dong too." ―Got it. I'm heading to the dorm now, so take it easy. If anything comes up, I'll message you. "Thanks." ―No need to thank me, I should be apologizing. After living in the dorm for over four months, one thing I'm certain of is that all five kids have some dependency on me, each in their own way, and they like me. Especially Seowon, who is possessive and obsessive, and Lia who, despite not showing it, would feel restless and bored without me, feeling like her insides are twisted. Three days. Let’s go dark for just three days after telling them I quit... I only want one thing from those two. Self-awareness of what they did wrong and why it was wrong. Apologies without genuine reflection are as rotten as a bad apple. The repetition of these incidents happened because they lacked this awareness. Of course, this method wouldn't have worked before the 'Hug Me' album was released. If I’d said I was quitting before debut, Han-ga and Jin-ga, with their pride, would’ve acted out, suggesting we quit together. But we've come too far to throw fits now. Regardless of their relationship with me, they are bound by company, members, fans, and broadcast contracts. With Eunsil, Yona, and Hong supporting them, they might start to understand. While Seowon’s game show recording was underway, I shared my real intentions with Yeom, Manager Kim, and the remaining three members of Up Key Girl. I told them I'd act like I was quitting and asked them to play along. Though the excuse was to fix Seowon and Lia’s behavior, I also needed the break. Hadn’t I been running nonstop all this time? Today's A-Tension gossip incident had pushed my stress levels through the roof, and I needed to unwind. I swear, earlier today my head was spinning, and I realized this might be what they call stress-induced illness. My private life was already under scrutiny, and even the kids weren’t helping, so the wounds inside me burst open. An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth. When dealing with unreasonable people, sometimes you have to confront them head-on. It pains me to hit them where it hurts, but today I’m angry enough to speak harsh truths. After sending the kids home with Jang-Woo, I composed long, heartfelt messages, pouring my frustrations into them for Seowon and Lia. At least I have to tell them what they’ve done wrong. The crux is, "Words and attitude can also be forms of violence." Every time I remind them to be careful of their words and actions, their usual excuse is, "What can I do when I’m like this?" They say they don’t mean it, but the words just slip out without them knowing. ------------------- To: Seowon You hate violence, right? But imagine someone hit you and said this: "I can’t help it if my fists fly on their own." How would you feel? Bruises from fists may heal, but wounds from words cut deep and linger. Individuality and callousness are entirely different things. You've hurt others and masked it as your personality and individuality. But let me tell you bluntly, that's not just different, it's wrong. Think about the actions you detest the most, the ones those bullies and the man you won’t even call father did to you. If you did the same to someone else, it might be easier to understand. They probably justified it the same way: you deserved the beating, you asked for the bullying. It’s the filthy excuses of aggressors. I can't bear to see you like that anymore. It's not just about what happened at the salon today; I'm talking about all your deeds up to now. If you can't stand the temple, leave the monk, as the saying goes. Despite therapy and countless discussions, if there’s no change, maybe it’s time to accept that this is who you truly are, just as you said. Let’s avoid crossing paths from now on. ------------------- ------------------- To: Lia I've told you over and over again. Your single misstep can cause harm to the seniors you cherish. Today, however, you did something critical enough to determine whether the team stays together or breaks apart. Sure, let's acknowledge that gossiping behind someone's back might happen. But isn't it only right to own up and apologize if you get caught? Justifying yourself with 'it's all true' is not acceptable. Honestly, even as I say this, I don’t know. Talking to you often feels like talking to a wall. I didn't want to go this far, but if you put yourself in others' shoes, you'll realize how wrong you are. Imagine the people who demanded money from you and acted violently said this to you: "So what? This is just how I live." How would you feel? From now on, I won't cater to your feelings or sugarcoat my words. Aliyah, you're the most inconsiderate and selfish person I've ever met. Let’s avoid each other from now on. I HATE U ――――― When I was writing, my anger was seething, and I aimed to hurt. But now, as I prepare to send it, I picture their faces in regret and feel a pang of softness. I consider letting it slide one more time since they seemed a bit remorseful earlier. But realizing that leniency led to today's A-Tension incident jolts me awake. After hitting send, I left their chat windows untouched. Discipline aside, since this is a rare vacation after months, I thought I’d enjoy it a bit. I reached out to old friends from work whom I hadn't had a chance to meet. *** "Hey, call that guy over." "Who?" "Plan L’s Je-hyun? Is that right?" "Je-hee?" "Whether it’s Je-hee or Je-hyun, doesn’t matter. She's really pretty, right?" "I heard at your farewell party there might be something between you two. Did you have sex?" "Hey, it’s nothing like that, you idiots." Apparently, my farewell party with Je-hee in attendance is now a company-wide rumor. My colleagues from when I first joined, Jong-woo and Yi-jun, who are two years younger than me, kept egging me on to call Je-hee over. "Or bring over the kids you manage. Let’s see some celebrities." "Hey, let’s not do that. Imagine how you’d feel if your team leader contacted you outside of work. Inviting them to a drinking party as a manager is abusing power. And you're married, why would you want to drink with kids barely in their 20s?" "Aww, just saying. And what does being married have to do with it?" "Then call Je-hee. She’s a mature adult." "Get lost." Even as I said that, the drink was getting to me, and a whimsical thought of contacting Je-hee fluttered to mind. She did say she’d treat me to a drink, and she enjoys meeting people. She’d probably come if I called... "Should I give her a call? She did say we should drink sometime." "Seriously?" "Hey, I can pay for the drinks, just invite her." "Tell her to bring some of her celebrity friends." "Hey, I’m not that close with them! Honestly, you guys are embarrassing. Middle-aged and not fun at all." "Come on, we’re all middle-aged here. It’s my lifelong dream to drink with a celebrity." "Yeah, man. Don’t they say you should grant a dying man's wish? Just once, please?" "Who are you to decide whether to invite her or not?" "Look at him acting all bossy because he’s got the upper hand." "Enough, enough. Called them to the team farewell but now you’re acting stingy. Forget Plan L; let’s just drink and hit up Dujocha. Celebrities, as if." Pouting, these kids. I took out my phone, which had been on silent the entire time. There were over 300 messages, no surprise, mostly from Han Seowon. As expected, it was over 300 messages from 'Device 2'. Before I even checked them, I sent a message to Je-hee. Me: [What are you up to?] JH: [I just finished the kids' lessons and am on my way to meet Su-hyeon. Where are you?] Me: [At Sangsu with some former coworkers, having drinks.] JH: [Really? I'm meeting Su-hyeon at Mangwon-dong, close by.] Jong-woo, who was reading our chat over my shoulder, got excited. "Wow, look at him! Acting all not close, but Je-hee calls him oppa." "They said it was wild at the farewell party." "Mangwon-dong is nearby. Ask her to meet." Before I could respond, Je-hee initiated contact again. JH: [If your friends are okay, let’s meet up.] JH: [I owe you a drink, remember, hehe.] "Isn't Su-hyeon the best singer in Plan L?" "Yeah, why? Is she coming too?" "Yeah." "Wow, we gotta book a wine bar. We can’t take celebrities to a dive." Me: [The guys I’m with are total middle-aged bores, might not be fun for you.] JH: [That’s okay, we're fun enough! Haha.] Can I love you? I should be allowed to love someone like this, right? How can anyone not love a woman like her? "Game over. She’s into him." "Really? Is she coming?" "Not only that, she said even if we're boring, it’s fine because they’ll make it fun." "Wow, is Yunho hyung gonna get married next year?" The gloom from dealing with Seowon and Lia lifted. My spirits rose. I confidently asked my colleagues, "Should I ask them to come here, or do we move places?" "This place is kinda lame. Let’s move. They haven't eaten; let’s go to Byeol House." "Okay. I'll send them the address then." I sent Je-hee the address and finished my drink, then began checking the rest of my messages. **First Fixture [Yeom chewed out Seowon and Lia]** First Fixture [Seowon cried, and Lia didn’t even speak] First Fixture [Today’s filming will only feature the scolding scenes] First Fixture [It's not all bad; at least we’ll get good screen time, haha] Having Eunbit worry about the broadcast amidst everything makes me feel reassured. Third Fixture [You’ve been pushing yourself too hard lately. Don’t worry about us, just turn off your phone and take a full rest.] Having Yona caring for me brings a sense of relief. Fourth Fixture [Bring Kyochon chicken when you come back] Fourth Fixture [The new menu, please] Seeing our Hong trying to play it cool and lighten the mood made me chuckle. Second Fixture [I’m sorry] Second Fixture [I kept saying I was wrong earlier too] Second Fixture [I won’t do it again] Second Fixture [I now understand what I did wrong] Second Fixture [Don’t quit] . . . Second Fixture [That was really mean] Second Fixture [But no matter what, this isn’t right] Second Fixture [If this was the end game, why start at all?] Second Fixture [You said you'd take responsibility for us] Second Fixture [I promise I won't do it again, just take a few days off and come back] . . . Second Fixture [Got scolded by Mr. Yeom] Second Fixture [But I didn’t make any excuses because I was wrong] Second Fixture [My head hurts…] Second Fixture [I might have a fever, not feeling well] Second Fixture [Even if you’re quitting, could you at least take me to the hospital once?] Me [Is Seowon really not well? She’s saying her head hurts and she needs to go to the hospital?] First Fixture [Fake concern, haha. She's fine. Yeom offered her Tylenol, but she refused.] Me [Is the filming going well?] First Fixture [Hong Hong is carrying the show! She’s hilarious, even the producers are cracking up. They’re calling her Up key Girl’s secret weapon!] Me [Okay, keep it up, haha.] First Fixture [Yeah, but don’t get wasted; just go home and sleep with ‘Sesame Girl’ and elder Gyudon, don’t stay out overnight!] Me [Where else would I go but home?] First Fixture [Maybe with Jehee or her sister, or former Plan L members, perhaps?] Caught me red-handed. I didn’t reply. But seriously, Han Seowon trying to pull one over like this. So grateful I planted a spy. I checked Lia’s messages. Fifth Fixture [Yum Yum, I didn’t know it was that hard. I really won’t do it again. Everything Yum Yum said is right.] Fifth Fixture [Even when Yeom was yelling, I didn’t say a word. Please come back soon and praise me.] Fifth Fixture [They say leaving home brings hardship. Just take a breath of fresh air today and come back home soon.] Fifth Fixture [Because without Yum Yum, the older sisters are having a hard time. Aliyah is bored. Jang-woo and Yeom aren’t any fun.] Lia included a photo. It showed her kneeling on my bed. Cassie must have taken it. Her hands were neatly placed on her knees, radiating an air of contrition. The noble princess kneeling, huh? "Aish, really..." Is this what it feels like to be a dad with a daughter? No matter how I think about it, it seems I’ve been tamed. A smile naturally curled at my lips. Lastly, I checked the message from Writer Uhm Seung-mi, who planned this reality show. Writer Uhm Seung-mi [Did the manager quit?] Writer Uhm Seung-mi [Eunbit says you quit. Is it true?] Me [Nope. I lied to strengthen the kids' teamwork.] Writer Uhm Seung-mi [I thought it was odd. Want me to draft a scenario for team-building? As a prank, haha.] A prank? Sounds good. Me [Make it strong, please, haha.] < Make it Strong, Please > End