173 - I Unknowingly Rejected My Favorite

EP.173 #173. Theories on Parenting “Hey, Kim Luca.” His face was brimming with mischief, though I wasn't sure what the cause of his good mood was. “What is it?” “Aren’t you interested in treating me a bit better?” I took a sip of lemonade from the plastic cup, shooting him a look that asked, 'What are you talking about?' “Are you saying I'm not treating you well lately?” We had been meeting a bit less frequently, but I hadn't done anything wrong. In fact, the reason for our infrequent meetings was because he was returning late from his daily composition lessons. Even though he was less busy than when he was preparing for his acting, blaming me for this seemed unjust... “No, no, no. That's not it.” He waved his hand fervently, trying to dispel any misunderstandings. Then what, is it? “Then why are you saying I should treat you better?” “Ahem... Well, when it comes to me, I’m a student of Ash Block from the Great Bitdam Agency.” Just a month ago, he didn't even know what Bitdam was. Watching him prattle on was quite amusing. “Okay, so you’re his prized student, but how does that give me a reason to treat you better?” “I might get a chance to see your recordings!” He squeezed my hand tightly, his eyes sparkling with excitement. “You? How would you manage that?” I thought it was a near-delusional fantasy. “No, I mean... I won't see it directly! But when Ash Block's teacher works on the collaboration album, he offered to include my work as well.” Oh. That made sense. But still, that wasn’t something he could do on his own, right? His explanation still seemed lacking, so when I tilted my head skeptically, he explained that he'd be assisting beside the teacher. “Hmm... So, in simpler terms, you’re like an assistant?” “Assistant?! Sub! Assistant! Student! Why use bad terms when there are perfectly good ones!” “Isn't it just that the teacher will do all the work while you fetch water and such?” Teasing him because of his funny reaction made him jump around, denying it vehemently. “Anyway, congratulations, Luka-rio. So you might see us recording?” “Yes. So, are you planning to visit the company’s recording studio in person?” My manager had asked me, but I hadn’t made up my mind yet. For a Vtuber, stepping into the offline world was still a daunting thought for me. Even though no one would recognize me, it just felt that way to me. And given how things went the last time I visited the main office... Maybe it's better to stick with studio recordings... “Hmm... That’s true. It's definitely better to get live feedback on the spot.” I had already experienced several cycles of sending files, anxiously waiting, being criticized, and re-recording. It felt like the trauma was closing in on me again. Ugh... I don’t want to... I enjoyed streaming, but recording songs was still unpleasant to me. “Then come and do it!” “You want me to go that far just to hang out with you?” “No, it’s not about going there to hang out.” Seeing his overly bright face seemed like a relief. If he were still trapped in that swamp of failure, I would have been heartbroken. The name YM felt both grateful and irritating to me. “I’ll think about it. It's not a sure thing yet.” “Ah, why not? I might be able to adjust your part too.” “Don’t lie, won't the teacher be the one doing that?” He flinched noticeably, as if caught out. His demeanor didn’t match his appearance, so docile and gentle. Underneath his cool shell, he was really just a child at heart. “Well... If I talk to the teacher, they'll actively reflect on it.” “Yep, yep~ I’ll do well~ I will~” As I stood up, implying we should leave now, he followed me out of the cafe. “From now on, let’s not bother bringing outerwear.” “Indeed.” The warm May sun greeted us kindly. “Oppa, you know May is the month for families, right?” “Of course.” “Then, do you want to have kids when you get married?” Given he was dating me, I skipped asking if he was against marriage. “Kids? Hmm... I’ve never really thought about it.” “Huh. Why? Don’t people usually think about such things?” Scratching his head awkwardly, he laughed indulgently. “To be honest, if it weren’t for you, I probably would have gone on not dating anyone at all.” “...Really?” “I’d have just continued to uphold the rights of 2D characters, watching Closer streams.” “So, you never intended to date any real women?” “Well, because I knew them and liked them.” Thinking of how I had fallen for him and secretly admired him made me blush with embarrassment, wanting to hide somewhere. “Y-Yeah.” Feeling awkward, I had to steer the conversation back on track. “So, how many kids would you like?” “Well, how many will you have?” Our gazes met in the air. Does he know the implication behind his words? Is he really saying that so openly? Asking me to have kids is like asking to marry me. I felt steam coming out of my ears with a loud hiss. “T-That's... I'll go with whatever you decide...” “Then would you have a hundred if I said a hundred?” Ah. Who cracks jokes like that? I playfully punched his back repeatedly. Saying such nonsensical things. “You’re saying whatever in the middle of the day!” “Hey, you said it like that.” “Well, find someone else who’ll have that many kids with you!” Chances are, whoever she was, she wouldn’t be from Earth. As I looked up at him with a puff of air, he placed a hand gently on my head. “Then why don't you set the terms? I have no idea.” I wasn’t thrilled to constantly be caught in his flow, but I couldn’t dislike the underlying assumption in our conversation: we were talking about getting married. The endearing implication was impossible to hate. “I... I want a son.” “Really? I prefer a daughter.” “Why?” He seemed like he wouldn't have an opinion on this. “Well, if we have a son, he might turn out just like me.” “Wouldn’t it be great if our son was this handsome?” “But what if that son spends all day in his room watching Vtubers?” ...That indeed might be challenging. Imagining myself as a mother made me feel breathless. “Wasn’t your mom ever concerned about it?” “Well, she knew about the incidents at school... I think she was just happy as long as I kept my studies up, but I’m not entirely sure.” “I see…” Still, I don't think I'd ever scold my child for watching Vtubers. Even if all the other moms scolded their kids, I believed I shouldn’t. And if my kid ever found my videos... Ugh... Ughhhh... My mind felt like it was splintering. Would there even be Vtubers by then? Like in some sci-fi comic, maybe our consciousnesses would be all connected to the internet by that time. “Doah, are you against having a daughter?” “No, not really? Honestly, I think I'd adore any child of mine.” He paused, and with both hands, he gently pinched my cheeks. “They must have been even softer than this when you were a baby.” “Whare ya doing, letSH go.” In the middle of the crowded street, here he was, playing with my cheeks. “Ah, I can't wait.” He moved forward, grinning dreamily as if imagining something. “What if she gets a boyfriend?” “I’ll have to deal with that.” His answer was immediate and unwavering. “...That's pretty intense.” “...Anyone who tries to steal Kim Doah Junior from me deserves it.” With a clenched fist, it was clear he wouldn’t just let it go. “What if she gets obsessed with a male Vtuber?” His face twisted comically as if he’d eaten something horrible. “Ah... Maybe we should just have a no-electronics rule.” “What are you saying? Do you want to make her an outcast?” “Oh... But if she slams the door and says, ‘What do you know about DangDang Live, Dad!’ I might just die.” Truly, people are creatures of hypocrisy. -VRINGGGG “Oh, hang on a second. It’s from the company.” [Hello.] [Ah, yes, hello. Luca, are you okay to talk now?] [Yes, go ahead.] What could the manager want at this time? [There's an advertisement request for Luca.] [Oh, then maybe a collaboration with the members?] [No, it’s specifically for you, Luca.] ...A personal ad? [Okay, okay.] [This might take a while to discuss. Are you outside right now?] [Ah, yes. Can I call you back when I get home?] [Sure, when can you call back...] [Give me about 10 minutes.] [Got it!] Staring blankly at the red screen, he asked, concerned. “Why the serious face?” “I got a solo ad offer...?” “Oooh... Is it for baby products?” Surprised by his unexpected joke, I slapped him on the back with a resounding smack.