1.6 - A Story About a Married Teacher Who Becomes Obsessed With Her Female Student

Chapter 1: "The Scent of the Sea Doesn't Reach Me" - Part Six "Oh, I just realized. Sensei, you're married, aren't you?" "Uh, yeah, that's right." Togawa-san seemed to have noticed the ring on my left hand. When I held it up to show her, she squinted her eyes and said, "Oh, really?" "How many children do you have?" Was it because I looked like I was at an age where one might have a big family? "Well, none yet." "Hmm." It seemed she was just asking for the sake of it. "Hmm..." And for some reason, Togawa-san tilted her head. Her curious reaction almost made me tilt my head in response. Even though she looked at me with an inquisitive expression, she didn't say anything out loud. I opened the wrapping of my bento box, feeling slightly awkward. When I lifted the lid, she leaned forward to peek inside but backed away once she saw what was there. "Lots of vegetables." "Do you not like vegetables, Togawa-san?" "I dislike vegetables just like any other person." I never knew humans disliked vegetables. "Let's eat." Together with Togawa-san, I put my hands together. ...I found myself staring at her long fingers. Just like her, they were slender and almost seemed to blend into the air with their fair complexion. Her nails were also neatly trimmed and painted. Although I should have been cautious about nail polish as a teacher, since it was such a soft shade, I decided to pretend I hadn't noticed. Those delicate fingers opened the package and grabbed a dorayaki. She tore it into bite-sized pieces and moved each piece to her mouth, chewing slowly. Despite having said it was delicious, there wasn't an overwhelming smile as she ate. The noise from the classroom was faint from this far down the hallway. Sounds from outside were muted, enveloping us in a quiet atmosphere. Togawa-san didn't seem to talk much during meals and looked at me silently, creating a slightly awkward mood. Her lunch consisted solely of two dorayaki, and she finished quickly, having nothing else to do. When I sat there eating in front of a student, it felt uncomfortable. I reached for a cup, only to remember that Togawa-san was using it today, so I drew back my hand. "What about Sensei's tea?" Togawa-san, observing my movements, asked. "There aren't two cups." "Why not just drink from the bottle?" "...Ah." She was right; that was an option. Drinking right from the bottle was fine without a cup. "Togawa-san is clever." "Ahaha, Sensei is unexpectedly..." "Stupid?" "No, a bit absent-minded." It felt like she just rephrased it. Grabbing the bottle of tea, I tilted it back to drink straight from it, savoring the marvels of modern convenience. At home, it's normal to have a cup, and I rarely eat with others at school. The obvious idea of drinking directly had slipped my mind. Even if one thinks they are living an ordinary life, the thought process might be biased. "Now that we've had lunch, should we head home?" "Hold on there." As she jokingly started to stand up, Togawa-san giggled and sat back down. "There's that scary student counseling you have to do, right, Sensei?" "You don't seem the least bit scared." Just like last night, I felt like Togawa-san was underestimating me. When I was a child, teachers had an aura and an impenetrable wall about them, but apparently, I lack that. Even I recognize that. I don't get angry, after all. In recent years, I couldn't immediately recall how to express anger. I had become disengaged from intense emotions. You could say I'm calm, but negatively speaking... various words come to mind, but perhaps 'indifferent' is the most fitting. Yet, strangely, Togawa-san seemed like the exception to my indifference. Thus, here I was, facing her directly. "Okay, I'm going to ask a serious question, so please answer honestly." I pondered whether to set aside my bento box. But lunchtime wasn't particularly long, so I decided to continue eating despite the impropriety. Togawa-san didn't seem to mind and simply grinned. "A serious talk, huh... I might be more interested in Sensei's unserious stories." Upon hearing that, I thought about 'unserious' for two seconds but couldn't come up with anything. "It's about going out at night." "Oh, that sounds really serious." Togawa-san's slightly troubled expression felt a little refreshing. "Do you have a purpose for going out at night?" "A purpose... I guess there might be." Togawa-san seemed deep in thought, her eyes wandering. "You do?" "Yeah, to kill time." She didn't seem to be joking. "In that case, you could just say 'no.'" "Okay, then no, there's not." She corrected herself flippantly. "Really, there's not?" "Yeah." "If you're bored, though, why not study at home or something..." "Sensei, were you the type of high school girl who studied to kill time?" Her innocent eyes pierced right through my weak point. "No, I didn't." I must admit that advising people to do what I wouldn't do myself lacks persuasiveness. Looking back, what did I do during my high school years? I met my husband and started dating during university, so before that... before? It wasn't so long ago that it's hazy, but I can't clearly recall my high school self. It's only been a decade. ...Not very recent, right? Well, it feels distant, but... like deliberately shrouded in mist, it's hard to reflect on the past. While fragmented memories remain, the self-next-to-those-events isn't easily molded. "Sensei?" Togawa-san leaned in, peering at me with an almost defenseless closeness. Our foreheads nearly touched, causing me to hastily lean back. As I distanced myself, the faint scent of makeup wafted into my nose. "I was just contemplating how to address this. Wandering late at night without any real reason..." "Wouldn't it be more concerning if I did have a reason, Sensei?" "...That's true." She had a point. If she disappeared into the night with clear intent, I wouldn't be able to counsel her so calmly. It wouldn't be something I could handle alone. "I'm not doing anything inappropriate, like what you might imagine, Sensei. It's genuinely just for a walk." "I'm not imagining anything." "You know, walking at night means not getting sunburned." Ignoring my denial, she spoke about the benefits of nighttime walks while absentmindedly playing with her long hair. Maintaining her flawless complexion might indeed be important, but a slightly sun-kissed Togawa-san would also look quite healthy. Realizing what I was thinking, I came to my senses. "When you wander around like that, your parents..." The topic seemed difficult to approach, making my question slightly hesitant. "For now, they're not at home." While Togawa-san's demeanor didn't change, her response remained vague. In her gentle facial expression, there was a hint of a wish to avoid discussing it. But without broaching the topic, it was hard to move forward. I hesitated. Tried to proceed, wavered, and took a step back. Keeping a respectful distance seemed to define the limits of the relationship between a teacher and a student. "Without any real reason, stop wandering at night. It's dangerous."