1.14 - A Story About a Married Teacher Who Becomes Obsessed With Her Female Student

Chapter 1: "The Scent of the Sea Doesn't Reach Me" - Part Fourteen "You don't really think that people's hearts mature as they get older, do you, Sensei?" "Well, that might be true." Looking at you, I can't help but agree. "Why do you dislike facing your daughter so much?" "It's not that I dislike it, it's just that I enjoy cooking, drinking, and making merry. That's about all that makes me happy." For some reason, a passing staff member turned back at this remark. Togawa-san's mother, catching on, narrowed her eyes and smiled to cover up the slip. "If you like cooking, why not cook for your daughter?" "Cooking for my daughter doesn't pay the bills." "Why not cook for her anyway?" "That's too much hassle." Togawa-san's mother made no attempt to hide her reluctance. "Then why don't you, Sensei, look after Rin?" Eventually, she threw it all on me. "You feel sorry for Rin, don't you? You pity her, right? Then help her out. That's undeniably the right thing to do. You should be proud of that." Her tongue was so loose, and her rapid speech was absolutely fluid. She's probably the type who can never repeat the same thing twice. And loud. There's no doubt Togawa-san can hear her. I was about to get angry—stop that kind of talk. "Making special considerations for a specific student is…" "You say that, but it's impossible to pay attention to everyone, right? There will always be biases and insufficiencies. You probably think 'this kid's nice' or 'cute' or 'handsome,' right? And then there's that student who's gloomy and hard to approach, and you can’t figure out what they're thinking, huh?" "I don't think that’s the point of this conversation." "I think consciously ignoring likes and dislikes is unnatural. You can definitely be indifferent to everyone equally, but are you aiming to be such a cold-hearted teacher?" She continued to throw out her one-sided arguments, still maintaining a haughty demeanor. And then, she decided to cut it off after what must have been an arbitrarily set amount of time. "Well, it's been five minutes. Sorry, even though you came all the way here. If you want to chat for a longer time, come around in the evening. But you probably don't enjoy talking to me, Sensei. We don't match at all." ".................................................." I hesitated to reply, 'You have a keen eye.' "But since you're here, do you want something to drink? I'll give you one complimentary drink." "No, I'm fine." "I figured you'd refuse." I did my best not to look at her face, adorned with blatantly provocative expressions. "I like people like you, Sensei. Though we probably won't be friends." "... I'm not fond of you." "See, we can't be friends." Leaving behind a voice that sounded like mocking laughter, Togawa-san’s mother retreated to the back. Her reaction to my use of "not fond" reflected a sense of having made a concession. Through this short interaction, I understood that she is not someone who fails to sense emotional nuances—she has deliberately chosen to live freely, leaving her daughter behind. My fists clenched even tighter. I left my seat to find Togawa-san. She was sitting at the end of the counter, eating cheese. The sight of a girl in a school uniform sitting in the subdued brightness of a bar strangely made for a picturesque scene. "Oh, are you done?" "Yes. Let's go once you're done eating, Togawa-san." Encouraging her with a gentle pat on the back, Togawa-san's eyes widened for a moment before she cheerfully agreed. "Okay." After popping the last piece of cheese into her mouth, she energetically stood up and joined me. Togawa-san's mother didn’t make a reappearance; instead, the staff member who initially guided me saw us off. It was the same staff member who had turned back earlier at Togawa-san's mother's words. "See you, Ichiki-chan." Togawa-san greeted the friendly staff member as I nodded in acknowledgment. The staff member also smiled warmly as they saw Togawa-san off. After exiting the bar, I checked the dark surroundings before suggesting to Togawa-san. "It's late; I'll walk you home." "You, Sensei?" "... It's part of a teacher’s duty." The hair over my ear and my gaze shifted slightly to the side, as if making excuses. To say I wasn’t somewhat sympathetic after the conversation with her mother would be a lie. Such sentimental feelings led to this suggestion. In this late hour, I couldn't let this girl go home alone. "Yeah, sounds good. Let's go home, Sensei." "It's not that far..." My voice trailed off, swallowed by the night. The uniform temperature of the air was interrupted by something warm. Togawa-san naturally took my hand, intertwining our fingers as she guided me. "It's not far. But we might be walking for about twenty minutes." Togawa-san's palm was larger, and her fingers were longer, so it was easy for her to control the grip. As our hands connected, I felt as though my hand was drowning in Togawa-san's warmth. "Hey, wait..." Even though we held hands in the school, walking hand in hand with a student outside... is this inappropriate? If it were, for example, a male teacher and a female student, it would surely become an issue. It could even lead to losing one's position after speculation and interrogations. It's strange that it might be more acceptable just because it's a female teacher, so this hand-holding must certainly be wrong. But the hands clasped so naturally, the smoothness of her hand almost made me want to linger in the comfort. While the night hid our connection from prying eyes, it refused to let the warmth slip unnoticed from our consciousness. What if other students or colleagues saw us... what would happen then? The hand-holding that barely goes unnoticed within the school—what meaning does it hold? "Sensei, how did it go talking with my mom?" Togawa-san asked cheerfully, seemingly oblivious to the fact we were holding hands. "What do you mean?" "Tell me what you honestly thought." To be straightforward, I had to first overcome a considerable hurdle. It’s always like that when making negative remarks. After painstakingly overcoming that hurdle, an expansive flat path opened up before me. "What a terrible parent." I openly spilled my true feelings. Upon hearing them, Togawa-san let out a short, dry laugh. "I think my mother truly cared for me as I grew up, but since I'm not yet a mother myself, I can't speak with certainty. Still, a mother who doesn't cherish her child...even if it doesn’t affect me, it makes me angry." I cautiously withdrew the strength that might otherwise tighten around our clasped hands, gently unraveling it. "You’re a good person, Sensei." "What about Togawa-san’s father?" It was a question I debated whether to ask, sending it out with layers of ambiguity. Is your father around, what happened to him, and a myriad of other difficult-to-ask items were all there, along with a hesitation to intrude. Swinging our connected hands a little wider, Togawa-san lightly answered. "He passed away when I was in first grade." For a moment, our swinging hands fell out of sync. "I see." "Were you just considering whether to apologize?" Her question carried an air of amusement. "A little." "Don't worry. Honestly, I don't remember much. He wasn't home that often, my father." In a house where neither parent is present, then who is there? That's right, only Togawa-san is there. She grew up in such a household. "After that, my mom got herself a new girlfriend... But Ichiki-chan is kind to me too." "Hmm..." Wait, what? "...Girlfriend?" It almost slipped by during our nighttime stroll, but belatedly, I caught on.