845 - I Am This Murim’s Crazy B*tch

"Uh, yes. Yes?" "Hey, kid, why are you in such a scrappy state at your young age? Are you aiming to become a professional beggar? People need to work, you can't just loaf around." Qing grabbed the boy by the scruff with one hand and started walking briskly. Since the boy seemed tense, Qing kept talking to ease his nerves. "Alright, let's first have a good meal. If you don't eat well when you're young, you won't grow. What do you like? You should know, today is your lucky day. Just say the word. Stew? Soup? Roasted? No, first let's pick some meat. What's your favorite among beef, pork, horse, lamb, chicken, pigeon, or pheasant?" "Uh? Well then—" "No, no, let's go with pork. It's good for you and tasty too. You know, pork is the most delicious meat, the only one historically banned because it was too tasty." "Um, mighty hero, please hold on, let me just—" "Now, imagine it. Boiled swiftly in the broth, pulled out until it's barely able to hold, jiggles at the touch, and when you slice it, the juice flows in torrents, glistening white, and when you eat it, the rich fat melts in your mouth without even needing to chew, put three pieces at once into your mouth, then mix it with some white rice..." Gulp. The boy's large gulp echoed. And once more, another gulp. It sounded delicious just hearing about it. Listening to Qing's enticing description of the pork, the boy suddenly snapped to attention. "Wait! Wait a moment!" "Hm? What's wrong? Oh, are you one of those who doesn't enjoy tender meat? You like a bit of chew? Wow, you don't know how to eat, meat has to be tender. It's because you're young and don't know what's good." "It's, it's not that—" "It's all because you've never been to a good place. But where in this neighborhood is good? Being a beggar here, you must know which place is the best—" "Brother! I have a younger sibling!" With Qing not listening and rambling on, the boy finally shouted loudly. At this, Qing finally understood. He had thought the repeated refusals were out of embarrassment or pride. He'd been persistently chattering, not listening, and it turned out to be the responsible mind of an older sibling wanting to feed his younger sibling too. "Huh. You have a sibling?" "Yes, my sibling is sick, so I need to eat and gain strength, but mighty hero, I'm fine. Please take care of my sibling..." In Qing's mind, he recalled the boy desperately gathering spilled food scraps, even after stumbling painfully. One should run in a dangerous situation, yet he was concerned about collecting scraps—it was all desperation to take care of his sibling. A heartfelt effort to feed his sick sibling garbage. Even if he didn't consume it himself, he was determined to feed scrap food to his sibling at all costs. Despite the risk to himself, he insisted on feeding garbage to his sick sibling above his safety. To the sick sibling, he would somehow feed spoiled, odorous garbage. It's somewhat touching, yet it's merely garbage... Well, where could a beggar possibly find proper food? Especially not a regular beggar but one called the Plague Ghost Beggar, someone untouchable even among the beggars... The kid must've known this too from personal experience. Recently thrown out but not yet entirely spoiled food scraps are the most popular meal among beggars; just trying to scavenge there was already a risky move. "Kid, you're slightly cool, huh? You have more than one mouth to feed—it's one plus one. So? Where's your sibling? Which way? Just say the word." At this, the boy replied. "Then, could you please put me down first?" "Ah, right. You were so light I forgot I was holding you. You need to gain a bit. Kids should have some chubbiness." "Kid? I'm not a—" "What's this? Are you really claiming you're not a kid? Hey, the fact you claim you're not a kid in itself proves you're a kid. True adults love being mistaken for being younger." Even as children long to swiftly become adults, adults often wish to return to being young. That human perception of aging is an unavoidable contradiction and sadness of existence, is it not? So, proclaiming you're not a kid is a loud admission of, "Yes, I am a child!" "So? Still insisting you're not a kid?" "...Ugh." The boy turned his head, seemingly defeated. Hmm, teasing this kid is quite fun. In any case, Qing followed the little beggar boy. Leaving the bustling streets of the city, they moved towards the outskirts, into a place so deserted it seemed empty. But it's not surprising. The shopkeeper had mentioned there were many storage warehouses in this area for fermenting or storing tea leaves in Jincheon. With empty streets due to no current merchants, it's no wonder there's a scarcity of people. Anyway, something about this kid's decision-making is questionable. While beggars generally don't mind others' eyes, it doesn't mean they're completely disregarded. In public, beggars still resort to minimal furtive behavior. However, with no onlookers? What truly happens, none but fellow beggars could know. At least, beggars are said to eat people. Yet he hid his sibling in such a secluded area? It's likely not just hiding the sibling. Looks like they've set up a hideout somewhere inside a vacant warehouse. **Terms and Explanation:** 1. **임마(imma)** - This is a colloquial Korean expression used between close friends or someone of higher authority when addressing someone of lower status or age in a familiar manner. It's kind of like "Hey, you" but in a more endearing or familiar tone. 2. **대협 (mighty hero)** - Literally means "great hero," used to address martial artists or figures of great skill and renown. It's respectful and denotes a sense of admiration for the skills or status of the person. 3. **동냥 (scavenged food/scavenge)** - Literally means "beg," but in this context refers to gathering food scraps from around. 4. **역병귀 (plague ghost beggar)** - It refers to a beggar so destitute and untouchable they are likened to a plague ghost, avoided by others out of superstition or discrimination. The passage contains a blend of humor and sentimentality, as Qing both teases and shows genuine concern for the boy's situation. It underlines the harsh reality faced by impoverished children and their dedication to care for their loved ones amidst adversity. Then, shouldn't it be considered remarkable that they haven't been eaten yet? Hmm, I can't leave things as they are. As a former Plague Ghost Beggar, I should impart survival teachings to a junior Plague Ghost Beggar. So, roughly, Survival Rule Number One: Completely give up on what people can eat. bWpnL1VNWWVlR0h2N0IyVWd5ZUJTNHFodDRxWk1HMW9yRzBMdTBRSHlyL0JuRnkzRE1YeDM3ZzJETWI0WWFGcA Beggars are sensitive about their food. If they think you're not after their scraps, you're less likely to be beaten. Instead, try to think outside the box. Maybe the things people say can't be eaten can actually be consumed. Start from that doubt and gradually expand your list of edible items. Hmm. Now that I think about it, this kid isn't like me with the Blood Poisoning Constitution who won't get sick from eating trash. My survival rules aren't as practical as I'd hoped... And my first year in Murim... No matter how hard I ponder, that first year seems like a waste of time. Still, wasn't there something I learned? Something, anything even minor. Qing trailed behind the young beggar boy, trying hard to figure out if that arduous period held any significance or lessons for his life. How long did it take? Qing never found any real meaning, but the boy reached the entrance to his hideout. "This way, here. Come this way." The boy squeezed himself into a narrow gap between two closely built warehouses. The boy, who seemed around ten years old, was one of those scrappy kids. A gap so narrow even such a slim boy had to turn sideways to crab-walk through. This... might not be possible. But Qing attempted it anyway. You never know until you try. Giving up even before trying is not an option. It is not that one does not do it, but that one cannot do it.(不爲也非不能也 (불위야비불능야)) It's not that you can't; you just don’t. So said Confucius. Don't give up before even trying. Besides, I may be thin from the front and back, though not necessarily from the sides or up and down. Surely I can slip through— "Ugh... this is too narrow, ugh...!" Qing squeezed between the walls, struggling. He managed to wedge himself in, but then his chest and rear got stuck, ugh. Still, Qing was naturally strong, and if you pushed hard enough, the flesh would somehow compress, so he inched forward slowly. In reality, many sayings from the old wise ones often contradict each other over the same subject. One does not measure one's own strength(自不量力 (자불량력)) You don't know if it's doable unless you try—oh, you foolish girl. From Zuo Zhuan of the Annals of Spring and Autumn. In simpler terms, don't even consider climbing trees you can't reach. With quite a bit of fat on my lean frame trying to squeeze through a narrow gap was indeed a foolish endeavor. Ah, this won’t work. It's impossible, utterly impossible. Realizing his limitations, Qing awkwardly wriggled his way back out. "Hmm." In hindsight, maybe the young beggar's judgment was sound? Who else could squeeze through such a narrow crevice? It's an impossible feat for anyone other than a famished, emaciated child. Perhaps if I had to guess, maybe Moyong Lady could make it through? Hmm, no, wait; despite her slender upper body, her lower body is quite robust, so she couldn't. So, isn't it the perfect hideout to elude other beggars? Even if one did try and force their way in, they'd end up wedged tight, easy to scare off with a single stone. Utilizing physical advantage, it’s rather clever? Being called a Plague Ghost Beggar and yet still living suggests they do have an impressive knack for survival. "Mighty hero?" Lacking any hint of pursuit, the puzzled young beggar's voice called from the other side. "Ah, my chest and butt are too big to fit through." "Why do you say such embarrassing things?" An unexpectedly dignified tone replied. What is this? Is he a precocious child? "Alright, I'll bring my sibling out." "No, go on. I’ll catch up." "But you said you’re, uh, stuck because of, hmm." "There’s always a way. Just go on." There was no need to force himself through such a narrow gap; if you can’t get through, why not just go over? With a light leap, Qing landed atop the warehouse's roof. The carpenters who built these warehouses likely never imagined the narrow gaps would become a lifeline for the young beggar. Building without gaps would make it easy for fires to spread and cause water damage from soaked bricks. They left just enough space for practicality. Thanks to that, the young beggar siblings survived against the vile child-eating beggars, so hmm, could this be considered a merit increasing their karma or something? Following the narrow alley of warehouses, Qing found that the warehouse at the end was slightly smaller. Just wide enough for a single person? A hidden, narrow alley barely allowing a broad-shouldered person to lie down. At the end, a shabby tent roof peeked down below. Qing landed lightly in the hidden alley. Perhaps sensing his arrival, a weak voice emerged from under the low-hanging tent. "Brother, you're back?" "Yeah, it’s me. Ugh, the smell. Even if you live poor, you should clean out the toilet regularly for cleanliness." Qing, a former Plague Ghost Beggar, and now 'Flower Beggar', jests. "Who, who are you?" Qing bent down to peer inside the tent. Inside, a pale-faced child looked back with a frightened expression, prompting Qing to flash a reassuring smile, oh, but then again, they might not see his face. **Terms and Explanation:** 1. **전전직 역병 거지 (Former Plague Ghost Beggar)** - Referring to Qing's past life when he was a beggar deemed untouchable like a contagion. 2. **전직 꽃거지 (Former Flower Beggar)** - A playful, self-deprecating term, indicating perhaps Qing once was seen as a beggar of slightly better standing or simply someone who stands out. The passage uses humor and sarcasm, highlighting Qing’s practical thinking and his playful nature even in challenging scenarios. Complimenting the young beggar's street smarts adds layers of mutual respect amid humor. "I'm? I'm a healer. Your brother says you're sick? Here, let me check your pulse. Can you extend your arm?" "Are you a doctor?" The younger beggar asked as he extended his wrist. From beneath an oversized cotton coat, worn and tattered, emerged a thin wrist, as if it were just skin on bone. "Actually, I'm not a real doctor, just a quack." "Gasp." Startled, the young beggar quickly withdrew his hand. But it was already too late. "Now, now, in life, once written can't be undone; once started, there's no turning back. Since I came all the way here, you have no choice but to be examined by the quack. Hmm, hmm? What's this, it's nothing serious. You're not really sick." "Really? I’m not that ill?" "Of course. It's just a matter of not eating enough. Some good food and rest, and you'll be as good as new." Just as expected, it was merely malnutrition. "Thank goodness..." A faint smile appeared on the young beggar's yellowed face. But soon, that too faded into a worried expression. "But, you said you're just a quack. You can't trust a quack." "Listen, kiddo. True masters never call themselves such. So if someone calls themselves a quack, that means they’re actually a fantastic healer." Qing thought of the Great Doctor Langzhong. Actually, even aside from Langzhong, this is often the case. True rich folk don't boast about their wealth; they just live well. Artists who are truly skilled often post their impressive art but claim they're embarrassed about their lack of skill. "Hehe." "What's this? You feel better because you're going to recover?" The young beggar burst into a broad smile. "Once I’m well, I can help my brother outside. I've been lying around all the time." "Good grief. How predictable and melodramatic. Did you think this would move me? Ah, suddenly something's in my eye, dust, possibly." Qing carefully embraced the child with teary eyes. "Alright then, let's go eat. In order to recover, you need to eat. Unfortunately, no greasy foods for you yet. But give it a few days, and it'll be fine." Just then, there was a movement from behind. "Gosh, mighty hero? How?" "See, real experts reach their destination first, even when starting late. And your brother here is merely weak from lack of food. A hearty meal will do the trick." Qing adeptly switched words from just moments ago where he spoke about the masters. There's a saying in the Central Plains that if a man speaks with forked tongue, he should be stripped of his manhood. Luckily for Qing, he'd long since parted ways with it, so he wasn't concerned. "Oh..." "Now, come back out. Time for us to eat." "Huh?" With the younger beggar in his arms, Qing gracefully leapt into the air. It was the anti-gravity leap of Yue Maiden Footwork. Left behind in the discreet alley stood the older beggar alone. The little beggar watched Qing disappear onto the rooftop and wondered. Why insist on him leading if this was the plan all along?