861 - I Am This Murim’s Crazy B*tch

Just watching them eat is enough to fill me up. This refers to the phenomenon where seeing a loved one eat deliciously satisfies one's own mental fulfillment. Sometimes, however, the opposite holds true. Of course, the Brigade Leader’s meals should be accurately described as drinking rather than eating. Hmm, what's the difference between eating and drinking? If it's chewed, it's eaten; if swallowed without chewing, it's drunk? As long as it goes into the mouth, it's all eating. No need to fuss over distinguishing between them too strictly. The Brigade Leader's eyelids tremble slightly. That was about the most the Brigade Leader could react. He couldn’t even turn his neck because there was a chopstick lodged in it by Giwoon, and he couldn’t speak because Qing had punctured his windpipe. Thus, the meal occurs in a very strange silence. Originally, this forced dining had a major flaw: the process of opening the esophagus would block the airway completely. But just by providing a single breathing hole punctured in the bronchial area, there’s no longer any problem. And so, the enjoyable meal time for the onlookers came to an end. "So, Mr. Nameless from the Blood Cult, aren't you willing to have a conversation yet? Perhaps you'd like to say something, like giving up the Blood Cult's actions and seeking enlightenment? Raise your hand." Qing looked down at the Brigade Leader. Eyes filled with anger stared up at Qing. The Brigade Leader seemed to have plenty to say, but since he didn’t raise his hand, did he mean he had things to say but wouldn’t speak? Of course, that wasn’t the case. "Oh, right. You can’t raise your hand." Since his spinal cord was pierced, leaving him completely paralyzed. "Then, uh, if you have something to say, try blinking your eyes vigorously." However, the Blood Cult member continued to glare. Clicking her tongue, Qing lifted the Brigade Leader's lapel, covered his neck, and poured water over it. When the soaked cloth covered the breathing hole, air moved through the throat instead. "Kill me, just kill me." A hoarse, raspy voice, similar to the sound of metal, emerged. Apparently, the water towel over the breathing hole was letting air through, but there was no reason to care much about the voice, so it was just left as it was. In response, Qing made an exaggerated gesture, stretching out his arm. "Aha, do you want to die? Want to abandon that tough life and leave? Well, here's an amazing benefit just for you! Confess everything you know right now, and I'll make sure you die! And it's guaranteed to be painless! Isn’t that truly remarkable?" “It’s useless. Stop with the nonsense and kill me.” “Oh come on, why such sad words? I won’t kill you. I’ll make sure you experience all sorts of filthy things and long-lasting pain before you die lonely in old age. Now that’s what I call living long with sickness.” Ah, to live long with illness; there couldn’t be a nastier curse. "You wicked girl, you hypocritical orthodox sect members only put up a front in public, and behind the scenes, you’re just as demonic as any other mad dogs-" "Oh, what demons? Are there any as kind as this? I'm just trying to delay sending an evil soul, doomed to hell anyway, for as long as possible." "Evil soul? Ha, who do you accuse of being an evil soul? We only wish to free those oppressed by you brutal and wicked remnants of Zhongyuan. Who is the truly wicked one here, the one who will certainly fall to hell?" Well, that’s the kind of logic those Blood Cult bastards always use. Qing flashed a bright, unfazed smile. "Why did you kill the innocent staff and chef? Are they the cruel and wicked ones too? Or were they those oppressors?” “……” The whole ordeal with the poisoned food was the chef's craftsmanship, but it had been laced with poison. He wouldn't have done it willingly, so someone must have compelled him, something like 'do it if you don't want to die.' Then, they were probably eliminated quietly. The staff would have tried to stop them from getting to the chef, so maybe they were silenced the same way. Sadly, those deaths were needless. This was the front courtyard of Odokmun, and since they were wearing Odokmun’s robes, just telling them to be quiet would have sufficed to prevent any trouble. "Now that I think about it, I'm getting angry. Hmm, maybe I should pull out a few teeth. After all, they won’t need them until they die." “Wait a minute—” Qing swiftly acquired four front teeth from the Blood Cult member! Without his front teeth, his appearance somehow became more naive, making him look unlike a Blood Cult member. She knew little about teeth, but remembered reading in some novel about how pulling all molars led to someone's death. Since there was plenty of time left before heading back to see the Absolute Sword Wall of the Dianchang Sect, she figured she could take her time extracting those teeth. Thus, today’s interrogation ended. Not much success, but it sure was entertaining. Upon stepping outside, she found the Jong brothers awkwardly sitting with their legs trembling and wobbling. Bending their knees, they had to consciously keep their hips pointed skyward, while lowering their arms to match their thighs horizontally. This was the traditional lower-body strengthening method of Zhongyuan, known as 'Mabo'. Surprisingly, the Jong brothers had rather good talent. With such talent, even without Qing's request, they might have been picked up as they passed by. “How did it go, did they say anything?” “No. He asked to be killed, so I just pulled out his front teeth. It was kind of funny, but he didn’t need them anyway since he won’t be using them.” “Thinking about it, if you pull out all his teeth, you wouldn’t need to gag him to keep him quiet. Why not just pull them all out while you were at it?” “I heard that pulling too many at once can kill. It’d be a waste if he dies after all the trouble to capture him alive.” It wasn't something you should say in front of the kids. But when practicing 'Mabo', nothing else registers. There's no energy to listen to others' conversations when all your focus is on your thigh muscles that feel like they're tearing apart. Yet impressive that they were still clenching their teeth and holding on— Little Jong Mun-yun stood up shakily, her legs trembling, approaching and hugging Qing's waist. **Terms not in the list and their translations:** 1. "혈교 말종 아무개" - "Mr. Nameless from the Blood Cult": The term "말종" refers to someone at the far end or the last of a line, often implying insignificance or a throwaway character. Using "Mr. Nameless" conveys this disposability. 2. "기운이" - Giwoon: It's a name here, and the character's gender isn't specified. 3. "오독문" - Odokmun: Translated directly as Odokmun. It's a sect/guild name referring to an organization in the story. 4. "중원의 하체 단련법, '마보'" - "the traditional lower-body strengthening method of Zhongyuan, known as 'Mabo'": The original term is left as it is, with additional context provided to understand its purpose. The passage reveals Qing’s somewhat playful and sarcastic nature alongside her ruthlessness when dealing with members of the Blood Cult. Her interaction with the captive Brigade Leader demonstrates her tactical wit and the depth of their confrontation, hinting at a larger ideological conflict between the "orthodox" and "unorthodox" factions. "Hing, Sister, my legs hurt." "Alright, alright, don't overdo it." Well, what more could a little one do? For a nine-year-old, Mabo training might feel more like punishment. Jong Moonwun was quite desperate, though, given that the child seemed much younger than expected. At fifteen, she was a bit late to begin martial arts, so she had to put in serious effort with determination. --- When Qing had moved past the canines and reached the first premolar of the Brigade Leader's extracted teeth. The main Poison Brigade of Odokmun, as well as the Blood Sword branch, had also completed the manor's defense preparations. The three elements of manor defense were as follows: Walls, formations, and traps. In this regard, Odokmun was particularly advantaged. The one-chapter-tall piled walls had the grandeur akin to high fortress walls. And the formations, which were supposedly learned as a hobby by Jang Chwaryang, had long surpassed the realm of mere pastime and reached the level of mastery. The so-called hobby was only so because Jang Chwaryang, having certain mental issues, had dedicated every moment outside of eating, sleeping, and excreting to the poisons and formations — his hobbies. Lastly, when it comes to traps, the answer is undoubtedly poison. Physical traps that cause bodily harm are something martial artists can generally withstand or evade. Thus, it was universally acknowledged that traps meant for martial artists should involve poison. And the Prime Poison Brigade handles poison. Even aside from that, Odokmun had a legacy full of poison stored up, truly an abundance of poison. And with this environment, Jang Chwaryang squeezed out all his abilities to create a masterpiece. It was the birth of an unspeakably horrible formation in Zhongyuan. Dubbed, "Eternal Annihilation Deathless Kill Immortal Slaughter Formation!" A name exuding a horrifying ambition of killing even the Buddha, the immortals, and the world—forever. As if the ambition wasn't already horrifying enough. Jang Choehyang's naming usually followed this pattern. "Hehe, even if Master comes, hehe, it will be quite, quite a struggle." Jang Chwaryang was someone who never lied. Even upon the return of the Poison Demon, they’d face great hardship entangled in this formation. When the master was finally wandering puzzled, if he dismantled it for him, he'd surely receive praise for a job well done? This was why Jang Chwaryang had a constant sly smile. Perhaps the master might find it shocking to praise such a depraved disciple for getting him tangled in formations, but it would be due to the Poison Demon's indulgent and infinitely positive upbringing of this oversized child. “Is it really alright? I’m not very familiar with formations…” “Then, then, say nothing. It’s better to be clueless and not meddle, hehe.” In truth, the "Eternal Whatever" formation was one even true formation experts would find difficult to award marks to. Because there was simply no way out. Formations are complicated and challenging because they need to be lethal and hazardous to enemies while providing a safe space for allies. But with no escape routes? It means that once entered, there’s no exit regardless of friend or foe. Especially in a defensive scenario like this. By gathering everyone in the central building of Odokmun and enclosing them with this whatever formation, friend and foe alike found themselves trapped in a perilous formation. Of course, with the heart of the formation centered in Odokmun, it could always be dismantled at will. The subordinate’s concern lay precisely in this. "This way, we're also isolated..." "Anyway, even if Dianchang Sect comes, if the Bright Sword arrives, we can’t prevent it." A glaring weakness of the formation, or rather a weak point. If someone with brute strength pummeled it indiscriminately, eventually the components constituting the formation would be undone. Either the formation kills the martial artists first, or they destroy the right component before perishing. Yet, if a top-notch master of the Life–Death Realm set to breaking it, it would quickly turn to ruin. "However, if the Bright Sword comes, even after breaking the formation, they’d be poisoned. So, if everyone combines forces, we might stand a chance. Don’t you think? Can we win?" "We’ll definitely prevail." Fervor reignited in the subordinate’s eyes. The strategy wasn't intrinsically flawed. Traditional clans usually have sufficient food reserves, and with wells in place, enduring is possible. And invariably, within a month, the Poison Demon would return. Should the orthodox sects attack before then? As the Brigadier said, without the Bright Sword, it could indeed be an opportunity to massacre the elite of Dianchang Sect, and even if the Bright Sword was present, it would likely suffer significant damage. Revenge would come through the Poison Demon and Blood Cult comrades, leaving their demise not as a futile death but as a noble resistance risking their lives. Still, why did this ominous feeling persist? --- Jihyeon's back arched like a bow. Not backward, but forward. Her head was nearly grazing the ground, to the point that it was hardly different from bowing. Of course, she couldn’t prostrate herself. Doing so recklessly would amount to treason. “Hehehe, what honor it is to have you grace us with your presence, truly a glory across three lifetimes.” A manager’s shameless laughter was a form of propriety. Originally, eunuchs employed such behavior before the Emperor to mask their masculinity as harmless survival tactics. Eventually, this transformed into a manager showing submission before someone significantly higher-ranked. Much like how a dog rolls over and displays its belly to a superior. Framed positively, it could be illustrating one’s own ridiculousness to elevate the other's stature. And Lord Inspector was indeed a very high-ranking individual. One who could, with the ‘dain’ privilege, turn a prefecture lord like Jihyeondain into a mere scrap or trifle, as he was among the terrifying top authority figures. “Oh my, three lifetimes might be too much.” “Then I will say glory of this lifetime. Hehe. You seemed eager to hide your preciousness last time, so I didn’t dare perform ceremonial formalities back then…” **Terms not in the list and their translations:** 1. "장최량" - Jang Chwaryang: A character's name, gender unspecified but implied as male in context. 2. "제일제독대" - Prime Poison Brigade: Translates the term directly indicating a prominent group associated with poison handling. 3. "혈수단" - Blood Sword: A division within the organization indicating a martial subgroup. 4. "오독전" - Odokjeon: Translated directly as the central building of Odokmun, highlighting its tactical significance. 5. "감찰어사" - Lord Inspector: Indicates a high-ranking official with significant power. 6. "지현대인" - Jihyeondain: It's rendered as a formal title or rank rather than a personal name, reflecting its use as a reference to a prefecture lord's formal title. The passage further develops the dynamics within Odokmun concerning its defensive preparations led by Jang Chwaryang, showcasing the intricate strategies and counter-strategies employed in martial arts conflicts. "Oh, there's no need to fret so much. The vagabonds might be a bit unruly, but the locality seems to be running rather smoothly under your governance, Jihyeondain." “Hehehehe, you’re too kind.” Jihyeondain inwardly breathed a sigh of great relief. It seemed he hadn’t come because of any problem; he must have come to collect some 'sincerity.' 'Sincerity'—another term for a bribe. However, Jihyeondain, who was supposed to give away this 'sincerity,' actually felt quite exhilarated. Indeed, this was a rare opportunity. In this backwater place, when would there ever be another chance to present sincerity directly to Lord Inspector face-to-face? “Well, then, I should at least offer you some tea. We’ve received some precious pu'erh tea, so if you don’t mind temporarily excusing me so I can personally prepare it…?” The critical parts here are ‘precious’ and ‘personally prepare.’ In the language of officials, it meant: I'm going to bring a very precious offering, so please wait a moment. However, Lord Inspector shook his head. “No. I’ve actually come to ask a favor of you, Jihyeondain, and I wouldn’t want to trouble you with such tasks.” A favor. This word sounded different to an official's ears, as in their lexicon, 'favor' translated into a 'request' or 'solicitation.' Thus, Jihyeon lowered his voice. "Of course, just say the word. I will assist with anything I can. But, if I may ask, what is this favor...?" In turn, Qing also lowered her voice to speak. "Jihyeondain, I'm really sorry to make such a request, but could I borrow a cannon?" --- **Terms not in the list and their translations:** 1. "거지" - Vagabonds: Translated as vagabonds instead of the literal ‘beggars’ to capture their unruly characteristics in the martial world context. 2. "보이차" - Pu'erh tea: Translated to acknowledge the type of tea explicitly mentioned, capturing its cultural and value significance. 3. "감찰어사" - Lord Inspector: As previously translated, indicating the official's rank. 4. "성의" - Sincerity: Used to subtly imply bribe within the context of government and official interactions. 5. "대포" - Cannon: Directly translated, fitting the martial and strategic context, hinting at possible military or defensive needs. This passage vividly portrays the delicate dance of politeness and implicit communication often seen in officialdom, where every word carries weight and implication beyond its face value. Jihyeondain's reaction and the veiled conversation highlight the nuanced power dynamics at play, responding to authority with strategic acquiescence.