Chapter 20 Friend (2) - Martial Arts Masochist

Thwack! “...!” So Un lightly dropped a wooden sword on the top of Cheong Wol's head. Her body, which was frozen in a daze, trembled lightly. Despite the pain, she did not let out even a single groan. She simply blinked a few times, silently staring at the figure standing before her. First disciple, So Un. Both Cheong Wol’s master and the one destined to lead the Emei Sect after the Mu Wol incident. So Un slowly withdrew the wooden sword and spoke. "Not concentrating, are you?" "..." Cheong Wol bowed her head without a word. Instead, perhaps due to the tingling sensation, she carefully caressed her head. So Un suppressed a deep sigh internally. The concern for her disciple always resided within her, but these days, its weight felt even heavier. A few days ago, there was a conflict with the sect leader. Four days prior, a slap against a senior brother. She already knew Cheong Wol wasn’t close with her senior brothers. She understood the circumstances well. Cheong Wol was in a position too vulnerable to jealousy. Her training speed, the precision of her martial arts, the depth of her inner energy—no one could catch up to her. If that had been the only issue, things wouldn't have become this complicated. Moreover, Cheong Wol was peculiarly beautiful in appearance. Even as a nun in training, it's natural that the instincts of a woman can't be completely erased. Nuns, too, wish to be beautiful. Among such women, Cheong Wol was effortlessly beautiful, which inevitably aroused resentment. Long, firm legs, a slender and graceful waistline. An elegant frame and well-balanced features. Her eyes, proud yet somewhat longing. It was no coincidence she was called the Millennium Flower. People can applaud when someone possesses at least one outstanding talent. However, for someone who owns everything alone, resentment always follows. This was also the reason her relationship with her senior brothers frequently went astray. The problem was the issues that stemmed from this. It could be said to be Cheong Wol's sole flaw—her awkwardness in interacting with others. She was poor at resolving conflicts with her senior brothers. Always left alone due to their jealousy, Cheong Wol, having endured this since she was young, grew resilient in solitude, silence, and patience... Yet, conversely, she never learned how to grow close to people. She didn't know how to laugh at jokes, how to unravel trivial disputes, or that sometimes she would be flustered even in the presence of light-hearted banter. She lacked the skills to engage with people. Sometimes even So Un, her master, would get convinced by the existence of Cheong Wol and forget. That this perfect being, who seemed like a prodigy sent from the heavens, could have no flaws. That this proudly blossomed Millennium Flower would need no companions. That those around her were merely obstacles hindering this genius. However, witnessing moments such as when Cheong Wol, seemingly perfect, couldn't hold back her frustration, got into an altercation with the sect leader, or slapped her senior brothers, or was so lost even in training... ...it would belatedly occur to her that Cheong Wol was just human, after all. Equally lonely, equally struggling, equally feeling emotions. She simply endured without speaking, yet within her existed a complex world. Due to her extraordinary nature, everyone treated her differently. No one treated her ordinarily, or as if she were unimportant. This realization would always wrench at So Un’s heart, making it difficult to watch. Cheong Wol was pitiable, and she felt ashamed of herself. They couldn't fathom the burden they had placed on this young child. Reflecting back, there was a time long ago when she was a child who used to smile brightly... These days, she was so focused on the goal of growth that it was hard to remember the last time she'd seen her smile. In the end, So Un put down the wooden sword she held and ceased her reprimanding of Cheong Wol. Her disciple appeared slightly bewildered by her actions. So Un gently took Cheong Wol’s hand. “...Ah.” -Swish. Feeling awkward and embarrassed by the touch, Cheong Wol subtly withdrew her hand. So Un could not blame her. She simply smiled awkwardly and spoke. "...I heard about what happened with Baek Hee." “...Ah.” “If that's what's weighing on your mind, preventing you from focusing—” “-It’s not.” Cheong Wol cut So Un off at that moment. She spoke, a bit resolutely. “...It’s not. I’ve already spoken with Baek Hee. We resolved that day’s incident.” “...I see?” From Cheong Wol’s brief response, So Un could sense her rejection towards Baek Hee. This too, she couldn’t blame her for. However, if the issue with Baek Hee had been tucked away, she was bound to have other questions. “Cheong Wol, if you’ve settled things with Baek Hee, is there something else troubling you? It’s not just one or two days; for the past four days, you’ve struggled to concentrate...” “...” Something seemed to be caught within her, as Cheong Wol slightly lowered her head. So Un, not missing this, inquired persistently. “Tell me. Perhaps I can help.” “...” It was clear Cheong Wol had something in her mind, as she didn’t immediately decline So Un’s offer and hesitated for quite a while. She bit her lip lightly and continued to blink her eyes. Seeing reactions she had never seen before from Cheong Wol, So Un momentarily felt flustered. What on earth could she possibly be questioning? Soon, Cheong Wol began to speak to So Un in a whispering tone. “...Master.” “Go on.” “...What kind of relationship makes someone a friend?” **** Four days have passed since she separated from Han Seo Jin. Cheong Wol didn’t want to admit it...but one thing was certain. These four days could not have passed any slower. He said it clearly. After playing together once, do not come looking for him for at least ten days. He didn't want to get entangled with martial artists. Back then, Cheong Wol thought ten days was no big deal, but strangely, those promised ten days seemed to stretch further away. It was as if time itself kept elongating. The stark difference between the exhilarating and spine-chilling play she had with him, akin to standing on the edge of a blade, and the restrained life of the Emei Sect, amplified the sense of gap. Sometimes, she wondered if everything was just a dream. However, the vivid sensations of that day would always assure her otherwise. An electrifying sensation lingered beyond that forbidden line of betrayal she knew she shouldn't cross but found herself unable to resist. And the soft voice acknowledging this wicked side of her. Even just imagining all of it made goosebumps ripple across her arms. The fine hairs at the back of her neck stood on end repeatedly. If everyone knew about this side of her, they would label her a pervert. There she was, pretending to be virtuous, continuing her training at the Emei Sect, while recalling what happened in the basement, making the hairs on her arms rise. Cheong Wol felt revolted at herself, but perversely, only she and Han Seo Jin knew about this detestable side of herself. There was a strange thrill in sharing such a dangerous secret. Cheong Wol was slowly realizing. This play requires trust. It's an act of exposing one's most vulnerable moments. An act of revealing one's most unsightly self. Without trust in the others, this play was an insurmountable barrier. It's an activity only possible because she believed Han Seo Jin wouldn't gossip about what happened in the basement. Even in that, she felt another kind of betrayal. Thinking that her entire life’s reputation precariously rested in Han Seo Jin's hands was chilling. Yet it was she who handed it over. And as Han Seo Jin continued not to betray that trust she'd handed over, a strange sense of intimacy began to grow. The memories were still vivid in her mind. His voice as he drank, trying desperately to keep the beggars from entering the basement. His figure, who, when he returned, wavered yet patted her head for enduring well... ...Such a person tells her not to come for 10 days. Cheong Wol couldn't quite understand this. She knows it's a game. She knows it involves some acting. Like her, he probably isn't usually so compliant or fond of crude behavior. For Han Seo Jin, his haughty manner, his kindness, they were also efforts on his part. But undeniably, some emotion sprouted from those processes. Just as one can't cut away emotions with a blade, there's trust and a kind of bond that forms through sharing secrets... ...Could it really be that Han Seo Jin doesn't feel this at all? In his eyes, that day there was certainly a hint of desire. He mentioned he only engaged in such activities with her. Like how the experience was shocking for her, wouldn't it be the same for him? Could it truly be as insignificant as his telling her not to come for 10 days suggests? Due to her awkwardness with people, she didn't understand the personal boundaries with others. ...However, by her standards... The way he relieved her of her frustration, lent his shoulder to her tears, shielded her in troublesome situations, kept secrets — these actions felt too emotionally cold to be considered merely that of a stranger. That's why she asked such a question to her master, So Un. However, her master only returned an even more puzzling answer. “Friends?” “...” “Wouldn't friends be those you find joy with in each other's company?” ...Was it joyful being with Han Seo Jin? She wasn’t sure; she felt more disgust, embarrassment, and humiliation more often. “Oh, now that I think about it, isn't there that child? Poison Phoenix, Tang So Ran. You consistently compete and are aware of each other, so you must be friends.” ...Is that friendship? Tang So Ran was always picking fights with her and was eager to point out even the smallest mistake. Although she might smile outwardly, she was ever-ready to pounce with bared teeth. To her master, it might have seemed like pure competition, but to Cheong Wol, it was a suffocating opponent no different from Baek Hee. The frequent encounters were simply due to the geographical proximity of the Tang Clan to Emei. Perhaps reacting to her silence, So Un offered gentle advice. “Cheong Wol. It might not be my place to say, but... the first step in making friends is doing things the other person will appreciate. Like teaching how one makes friends.” “Pardon?” “Consider what the other person likes and show regard for it.” Cheong Wol pondered her words and asked. “Master?” “Yes?” “If you're friends... there's nothing wrong with seeing each other often, right?” To which So Un replied without hesitation. “If you genuinely enjoy each other, why would it be strange to meet often?” Now, back in present time. Again, she found herself thinking about Han Seo Jin. It wasn’t about wanting to see him or missing him. Rather... she merely wondered if he felt the same emotions she did. Random thoughts kept surfacing in the monotonous life of Emei Sect. Ultimately, he'd probably get bored too. After all... ...you're a loner too. Cheong Wol thought inadvertently. “...Sigh.” In the end, Cheong Wol sighed. Perhaps spending some time at the village market would help soothe her complicated emotions. . . . “Ah.” However, soon enough, she encountered him in that bustling market. Han Seo Jin, too, halted his steps as soon as he spotted her among the crowd. “...” “...” An extended eye contact took place. Vendors from the surroundings were praising Cheong Wol and muttering things she couldn’t quite hear. Four days. After just four days, she faced once more the only person with whom she shared a secret. The only person who treated her ordinarily... or as something insignificant. Cheong Wol just continued looking at him. For some reason, the instant she saw him...the stagnating boredom deep within her chest disappeared in an instant, replaced by a subtle fluttering. Perhaps it was because of the special connection shared through their secret. Thinking along those lines made a little bit of sense. Surely, he must be feeling the same. He had directly said it was a game he played only with her. Suddenly, she recalled their agreement. He said not to come looking for him for 10 days after playing once. ...But she hadn't gone looking for him. They just happened to meet at the market. So... Cheong Wol began to lift her hand slightly— —Whoosh! “...What...?” Han Seo Jin averted his gaze and swiftly disappeared into the crowd. Her partially raised hand halted in its awkward position. “...” And with his dismissal, as if he had deliberately ignored her... An odd sense of humiliation washed over her once more. ...There was a compulsion stirring within her, a desire to persistently follow and confront him, demanding to know why he ignored her.