Chapter 22 Friend (4) - Martial Arts Masochist

"Who are you talking about?" I wondered if I had misheard, and carefully glanced at Cheongwol. She maintained a bright smile as if she hadn't spoken to me at all, looking at Ga-young instead. Her demeanor seemed to outright ignore me. ...If she wanted to ignore me, why did she come closer? If she had no reason, why is she following me around...? Isn't this just tormenting me? Simultaneously, I pondered her words. ...Did she really ask who it was about? Who is she talking about? Ga-young? Is she asking who Ga-young is? Why would she be curious? And if she's curious, isn't it something she should find out herself? Everything was utterly confusing. Ga-young hastily clasped her hands together in an awkward posture. "Miss Cheongwol, it's our first time meeting, right? I, I'm Ga-young," she introduced herself with her usual friendly personality, her face filled with excitement. It seemed meeting the most popular figure of Emei Mountain had that effect on her. Cheongwol responded, with the same mask as ever, "I rarely come down from the main temple, so it's late, but I'm glad to make this connection. It's embarrassing, truly. Our Emei Sect always receives help from the village folks..." I was fooled by her smile and demeanor as well. I had thought someone like her could not have been infiltrated by inner demons. Had I known, I would have been cautious even when entering the back mountain. ...But now that I know, it was all just a facade. Unaware of this, Ga-young replied brightly, "No, no! It's understandable with your training! Also, since the dumplings we sell have meat..." "Thank you for your understanding." "Of course!" Then Ga-young shouted as she looked at me. "Han Seo Jin!" Cheongwol's body subtly tensed. "Here, take these twenty coins and buy a snack nearby for Miss Cheongwol." "...” “Hurry!” She's acting like a maid. I reached out to take the coins Ga-young fumbled for... - Clack! Cheongwol grabbed Ga-young’s hand, stopping her. “I’ll only take the sentiment. I just stopped by to connect, not because I’m hungry. I have to eat when I return to the sect, so having a snack now would be too much.” “Oh, oh! I see. I'm sorry... I just thought... well, I really enjoy eating, so I thought you would too...” “Perhaps next time, you can join me for some sweets. And you should take care of the gentleman here first...” ...Gentleman? "Him, a gentleman. What about when he was so rude?" Ga-young seemed to think the same thing and shouted, "A gentleman! He's just... not someone you need to be formal with!" She just treats everyone as she pleases! When Miss Cheongwol said so, Cheongwol finally glanced at me. After moving her lips slightly, she asked, “...You two seem close.” An odd feeling told me to cut off the conversation. “Ga-young, just give me my dumplings. I'm busy.” “Oh, right!” Ga-young excused herself to Cheongwol and turned to the steamer. “...” “...” Once again, it was just Cheongwol and me. A strange silence lingered. With Cheongwol standing beside me, my insides felt turbulent. Truth be told, I wanted to leave without the dumplings. But if I did that, Ga-young would notice something. That there was something between us. “...Boss.” Seizing the moment, Cheongwol whispered again softly, “...Won’t you answer my question?” Ultimately, I accepted that I couldn't avoid her and responded, “...W-what question?” “...I asked who?” What kind of question is that? "Ga-Ga-young? Di-Didn't you hear for yourself?” “...” Yet, Cheongwol remained seemingly dissatisfied, standing rigid. She continued, “...Why did you avoid me?” I wanted to ask the opposite. "Did you forget our promise not to find each other for ten days?” "...I never sought you out. We just met at the market. Or are you saying I have to avoid you instead? Should I flee Emei Mountain when you come?” ...Stop nitpicking, you wretch! You know you’re spouting nonsense! “...And why are you ignoring me?” She did not hide her displeasure. Unlike when she was in the basement, her eyes wide and anxious with tears. Now, her gaze was drowsy, sharp, and cold. It was the same look I had seen during the slaughter on the back mountain. Is space really that significant? Much like how a teacher looks different when met in the classroom versus the cafeteria. Or how a superior in the army feels different on base compared to in society. The difference between meeting Cheongwol in the basement and outside was vast. Here and now, she was a wild beast without reins. ...Frightening. “...Why are you polite with others but maintain this attitude with me? Did you not think I’d find your blatant disdain offensive?” “...Were you offended?” Cheongwol let out a chilling laugh. “...Of course, it's offensive when someone from a humble background dismisses me.” ...Wow. Look at this woman talk. Was she provoking me deliberately, or did she really feel that way? “...Is it okay for a nun of the Emei Sect to speak like that?” “...” Cheongwol turned her head as if she didn't want to answer. I scratched my head and sighed. Right. It’s my fault. Trying to avoid one problem only led me to a bigger one. It was just a simple greeting, wasn't it? I looked directly at Cheongwol. She visibly started, pulling herself back. “What are you doing—” I gave a respectful bow and spoke, "-Greetings to Miss Cheongwol. Thank you for your constant efforts." ...Satisfied now? **** “Greetings to Miss Cheongwol. Thank you for your constant efforts.” The greeting I so desired was obtained in such a trivial way. Yet, it didn't set my mind at ease. Why was that? ...Was the greeting too rigid? And the moment the formalities ended, Han Seo Jin turned back to the dumplings as if nothing had happened. While waiting, Ga-young spoke cheerfully, "Han Seo Jin, just in case you're thinking about it, don’t get any weird ideas about Miss Cheongwol. It's impolite just to have such thoughts." "Just give me my dumplings and quit talking nonsense." "Oh, right. But the leather gloves you made for me last time..." Soon, Han Seo Jin and Ga-young fell into their own conversation. Cheongwol quietly observed them from the side. "..." ...What's this feeling? Cheongwol couldn't understand the strange frustration boiling inside her. She had achieved her goal of getting Han Seo Jin to greet her. There shouldn’t have been anything uncomfortable lingering. If there were negative feelings, she could just cut ties and move on, as she had always done with her brothers-in-training. Yet, Cheongwol’s feet wouldn't move. Despite having no reason to stay, she simply watched Han Seo Jin and Ga-young converse. It felt as if her world was separate from theirs. ... That familiar, lonely feeling. As her master once said, an exceptional being is destined to be lonely. "..." Maybe it was an emotion she would've accepted normally. But today, she curiously didn't want to. While she stood idly, Han Seo Jin finally asked, "Miss Cheongwol, is there something you need?" ...In other words, why are you still here? Cheongwol tried to speak calmly, but even to herself, she sounded slightly offended. "It's not something you should worry about." ...In other words, I don't even know. But I don't want to leave. Standing there aimlessly felt awkward, so Cheongwol decided to watch people. She turned around, observing the passersby, glancing at the sky, and acknowledging those who made eye contact. However, her attention was entirely on Han Seo Jin. Suddenly, she recalled a conversation with her master. ‘...What is a friend exactly?’ ‘A friend is someone you enjoy being with, isn't it?’ "..." She glanced at Han Seo Jin. His presence wasn’t something she particularly enjoyed. It was frustrating. He likely wasn't a friend... ‘Cheongwol, though it might not be my place to say... The first step to making friends is doing nice things for each other. Consider what they like and be thoughtful.’ “Here, eat this,” Ga-young presented the dumplings. Han Seo Jin hesitated before starting to chew his dumplings. Cheongwol twisted her hair nervously before whispering to Han Seo Jin, gathering her courage. She didn’t want to say it, but the words came out. “...I’ll buy that for you.” “Cough!!” Han Seo Jin choked on his dumpling. “Oh my!” Ga-young was startled. Small bits of dumpling were scattered all around. Raising his hand apologetically, Han Seo Jin wiped away the fallen food. Cheongwol frowned. Was that really so surprising? After watching him all day, she thought she’d just help a bit since he seemed stingy. Without looking at Cheongwol, Han Seo Jin said, "Why would Miss Cheongwol buy this for me? It's not like we're close." "...” "And, this is meat, too. It’s a bit unethical for you to buy it.” "..." Though there wasn't anything incorrect in what he said, irritation piqued within her again. Something felt unresolved. She merely waited for Han Seo Jin to finish eating his dumplings. Once he did, she'd just follow him subtly as he moved on. "..." Cheongwol herself couldn't understand it. What did she truly want? Even she didn’t know. But like in the basement, being near him sometimes inexplicably alleviated these frustrations. Hoping it would be the same now, she simply stayed beside him. Han Seo Jin finished his dumpling. Cheongwol glanced at him once more. Han Seo Jin looked back similarly. Without exchanging words, a peculiar battle of wits commenced. Then, after a bit of awkward eyeing, Han Seo Jin remarked, "Oh... the dumplings are delicious. Can I have another?" "Oh? Sure." Ga-young replied as she turned around. "Um... Miss Cheongwol, aren't you going?" Han Seo Jin asked again. Cheongwol answered, "I told you, it’s not your concern." **** Only after stuffing three dumplings in my mouth and ordering a few more did I realize. Ah, that Cheongwol, she's not planning to leave. She’s just maintaining this awkward demeanor beside me. I couldn't discern what she wanted. She wouldn’t tell me even if I asked. The problem was, the longer I dawdled, the worse her expression became. Initially, she just stood quietly, but as time passed, she began making frustrated noises, like ‘Huff’ and ‘Humph,’ signaling, ‘I'm angry.’ ...So why is she angry anyway? What should I do...? "Miss Cheongwol, are you upset about something?" Cheongwol used formal speech in front of Ga-young, otherwise, she spoke informally. With Ga-young watching, she said, “...Me? No, why would I be?” "..." Ga-young seemed to pick up on something in her odd demeanor, looking at me with concerned eyes. Whatever I did wrong, I should just apologize wholeheartedly! She seemed to suggest. I looked at the two remaining dumplings and finally made up my mind. There's no point in stalling by stuffing more dumplings in my mouth. "...Ga-young, could you pack these up for me?" "You going to give them to the uncles?" "...Yeah." "I’ll throw in an extra one for free." With three dumplings in hand, I left Ga-young's stall. -Step, step... Only then did Cheongwol, who had remained still, begin to follow me. She was already trailing behind me. I quickly looped through the market. Buying everything I intended, I then made my way home. Throughout all this, Cheongwol continued to follow me. Why not just announce it for the whole town... ...I felt like crying. "You're quite comfortable talking to Miss Ga-young, aren't you?" Maintaining a certain distance, Cheongwol would ask whenever there was no one watching. "...We've known each other for a long time." I responded briefly, hoping she would finally detach herself. "...I have known you for quite a while too," Cheongwol said. "We merely were aware of each other's existence. You didn't even know my name, did you, Miss Cheongwol...?" "...” At last, I turned to face Cheongwol at the edge of the market. When I finally faced her properly, Cheongwol hesitated. "Do you want something, Miss Cheongwol?" "...What?” “Please tell me clearly. What is this, following me around all day?” Though intimidating, this needed to be settled, or it would never end. Cheongwol’s face was something to behold. She blinked anxiously, her lips twitched, her face took on angry and then puzzled expressions... She was silent, yet her demeanor screamed confusion. Finally, she pointed to the dumplings in my hand. “...That. You said you’d take it to the beggars.” “...Yes.” Originally, it was just to kill time... but since that didn’t work, I thought I'd give them to the old men. Cheongwol hesitated before asking, “...Why didn’t you ask me if I wanted to try one?” “...What?” “I was right beside you the whole time.” “How could Miss Cheongwol eat this? It's meat.” She raised her voice, looking incredulous. “The Emei Sect bans killing, not meat consumption!” Oh, is that so? I didn’t realize. So, was she upset because I ate them without even offering her one while she was right there? ...Then why didn't she just buy one herself? I’m not Mr. Kwakdu. -No, no. Keep it calm. If I can't control my emotions, I risk my life. I keep forgetting, that's Cheongwol. She's destined to become the Emei Sect's Chiltcheon, someone who’s eventually going to kill tens of thousands. She’s already experienced killing. Let’s rethink this. Sure, Cheongwol even offered to buy dumplings for me. I'm the one who just kept eating. Of course, she'd be upset. Maybe she was following me around because she wanted dumplings. I can offer them. Cheongwol continued, “You didn't greet me properly. You ignored me. And now, you don't even offer a bite to the person next to you?” "...Then, would you like to have this dumpling—" "-I don't eat meat!" Cheongwol suddenly shouted and then turned on her heels, walking away. I watched her retreating figure. "...” My fists clenched tightly. ...Really. A sudden thought struck me. ...Just come to the basement.