Infinite Regressor, Chapter 484 - I’m an Infinite Regressor, But I’ve Got Stories to Tell

15. As time passed, one day. A thunderous newcomer appeared in the already oversaturated field of V-tuber internet broadcasting. It wasn't a compliment. 『Goryeochan』 goryeochan_ra_vtuber The core member of the Regression Alliance! The rightful owner of Pyongyang, Northern Saint, everyone's sweetheart, Goryeo-chan♡ 『(●LIVE) Whoa! Waking up from saving the world on the brink of collapse, to find myself a super-genius girl painter?!』 Thunder, literally like thunder. Implying the intention to burn everything where it strikes. 「Ah, hello! I'm the Saint who saved the world on the brink of destruction. And, and. I'm Goryeo-chan, the guardian of Pyongyang and the North…….」 「Oh, and I'm the best at drawing in the universe. If anyone brags about their art skills, I wish they'd just lick my toes from below…….」 -? The viewers were bewildered by the bizarre concept presented by the newcomer. Sure, the field had transformed rapidly into a red ocean, but even concepts needed some degree of coherence. Saint? That's fine. Broadcasters with the saint concept were common globally. Genius artist? That's okay too. Plenty of streamers showcased their drawing skills as a highlight. But the owner of Pyongyang? Guardian of the north? Center of the Regression Alliance? What does that even mean? -Sorry, could the operator please consolidate the concept a bit? -Literally, a saint, artist, Pyongyang citizen? It's confusing; 「But... hik, that's me, though.」 She spouted absurdities excessively. Yet, that wasn't the end. -Even broadcasters must find it hard to earn money these days. 「Huh? Oh, no? I have a lot of money. I only live on an allowance, but it doesn't run dry…….」 「H-here. I'll show you my bank account!」 -? For the first time on the internet, a V-tuber shows off her wealth as soon as the broadcast starts by authenticating her bank account. The viewers were shocked when they saw not tens of millions but hundreds of millions in her account. The shockspread like wildfire through online communities, causing beasts startled by the flames to gather slowly at the new broadcast. -Is this for real??? -Of course, it's fake, lol. These days, it's so easy to fabricate those certification screenshots, lol. -I legit see such certs all the time if you do stocks. 「Because I thought you might not believe it. If you post an article praising me in a community right now and send me a message with the link and your account, I'll give you 1 million won…….」 -? -? -? -Wow, she’s really crazy;; -I thought she was just a weirdo, but now it feels a bit creepy... -The panel quality is good, but the person behind is nuts. Of course, no one believed the newcomer’s extravagant lies. However, the minimalists who devoted their lives to the internet were willing to act for amusement even if they didn't believe it. Two or three viewers actually posted articles praising the 'saint' in their respective communities and provided confirmation. -??? -Crazy -Guys, jackpot -Why? -I really got 1 million won transferred to my account -????? Something. Something was beginning to happen. -What? Did she hire operatives? -No, seriously, it got deposited!! -?? I got 1 million won too? -What’s this, wtf Even the 'reasonable people' who initially thought she must've hired part-timers began to doubt their understanding as the number of witnesses claiming they received 1 million won surpassed dozens, reaching triple digits. Otherwise, it would imply that everyone chatting and posting certification articles across various communities were all hired actors. Did she hire over a hundred operatives? On her first day of broadcasting as a newcomer? That doesn't make sense either, does it? 「Today, I plan to spend just 1 billion won. Articles I can't see hold no value…….」 「I'll come again at the same time tomorrow!」 The next day. -Open the store, open the store, open the store -Northern Saint, I posted the certification article! I've sent a message too! Please check it, my dear saint! -My dog is starving, saint. If I can save my dog with your grace, I'll become your dog instead. -All the beggars in the world have gathered in this room;; -But could you resist 1 million won?? On merely the second day of her debut, thousands of viewers gathered. It was a comedy resulting from this madness sweeping clean through communities overnight. The instigator of all this chaos, the V-tuber with the ludicrous alias 'Goryeochan', said this――. 「To-today, I'll give away 10 billion won.」 But. 「This time, it’s not 1 million won, but 1 billion yen each. Not more, not less. E-exactly one hundred people. I'll select them and give them each a billion yen…….」 That day. All communities perished. 16. Since acquiring the reputation of being 'the mad one who burned 10 billion on her debut broadcast.' Goryeo-chan surprisingly continued her broadcasts without a hitch. 「To-t-today, I'll draw the mythical Udumbara. It’ll be filtered a bit on its own, so please keep that in mind…….」 Due to the initial provocation, there were still some chats sporadically begging for 'please just 1 billion' or 'even 1 million, please’ over six months later. And even after that period passed, Goryeo-chan's broadcasts boasted an average viewer count of about 5,000. Why watch such a broadcast? The reason was simple. -Northern Saint! Tell us what happened today in Sinuiju! 「Ah, th-the Sinuiju engagement? It's pretty much always the same there. But when the aliens invaded, I did get a bit scared.」 Occasionally sharing stories from her time as a saint that were――unexpectedly, bizarrely real in a captivating way. 「Mo Gwang-seo christo Cathedral……. Oh. Now it’s the Kumsusan Palace of the Sun. Hehe.」 「There, they set up layers of defenses perfectly around the palace. But in a moment of oversight, the aliens invaded from Sinuiju in under 30 minutes!」 「I was with the Paladins, still fighting the defensive battle in Sinuiju when it happened……. It sent chills down my spine, I tell you?」 「Luckily, it rained. If it hadn't, the northern front would have collapsed that day.」 Ramble, ramble. Once she started telling a story, her words would tangle and her tongue would twist, yet she would persist, weaving tales that sounded vividly like personal experiences. There was even a viewer from the National Intelligence Service who pondered seriously, ‘How does she have such precise information about North Korean geography?’ Then one day. - Hey - So, you seem to have a lot of money - And you don't look like you need to stream, why are you broadcasting so diligently? Out of pure curiosity, a viewer posed this question. From beyond the speaker, she made an "Ah" sound before responding. 「Well. Uh, everyone, you're mostly men, right……?」 - No? - I'm not a man? - I'm a 15-year-old cute girl~ - Graduated from an all-boys high school and college, and served in the military, but anyway I'm a cute girl~ 「Anyway!」 Goryeo-chan said in front of her five thousand viewers. 「It’s because most of you are men……. The broadcasting, I mean.」 The viewers tilted their heads in confusion. A viewer, pressing a bench press while listening with earphones, merely twitched an eyebrow. She broadcasts because we’re men? What does that mean? Does she enjoy boiling stock that much? 「Um……. I have a boyfriend.」 ? 「But my boyfriend is, oh wow, just amazingly possessive.」 ?? 「I broadcast with you all behind his back……. Because, well, because...!」 「If he finds out I’ve been chatting cozily with guys for more than half a year! He’ll be very, very, very!」 「Jealous…….」 ??? About five thousand viewers wondered briefly if their species was Protoss, not humans. As all their minds linked in one thought, a word, a question mark, was projected as a whole. For reference, the viewer lifting the bench press got trapped under the barbell. Chaos ensued at the gym. - Wait - What is this - A V-tuber openly admits she has a boyfriend?? 「Yes? Yes, totally.」 「It's just that I called him a boyfriend……. Truthfully, since we’ll live together forever, he's practically no different from a husband?」 -??? What kind of nonsense was this. When faced with something beyond the bounds of imagination, humans could only be paralyzed. Thus, surprisingly, the number of viewers watching Goryeo-chan’s broadcast neither increased nor decreased. All were fixed to the screen. 「Whoops! The boat rocked again…….」 「Uhm. Yachts are great, but sometimes the rocking makes me queasy. Even though I swapped the antenna for an expensive one, the connection glitches sometimes.」 -? - Northern Saint, are you broadcasting from a boat? 「Oh, yes. Haven't mentioned until now, huh.」 「My, uh, well, my husband. Has quite a few partners, you see. So we’re traveling on a yacht together…….」 -? -? -? What is this nonsense? Already overwhelmed by too many settings, viewers' minds were exploding. - A wealthy person who doesn’t need to earn money - Purely for attention, threw 10 billion into the air - Consistently starts broadcasts on time every day, draws and shares stories, growing to a mid-tier level - And it's all to evoke possessiveness and jealousy from her boyfriend? Husband? - And that boyfriend or husband is dating others besides her? - On a yacht?? Indeed, connecting each sentence without a question mark was exhausting. The moment it was expressed in human language, it felt like the mind would be contaminated. 「Yes!」 Nonetheless, answering the viewers' doubts, Goryeo-chan's voice was nothing short of cheerful. 「Ahh. Guild Master……. Oh. That's what I call my boyfriend. Anyway.」 「I appreciate when Guild Master is possessive, but I’d prefer it if he was most jealous of me.」 「Thus, playing with other guys is most effective. Here, this is a private yacht. No others around.」 「Plus, if I tried to leave the harbor, Guild Master would figure out who I plan to meet. I couldn’t succeed with my plans…….」 「So! Internet broadcasting it is!」 「Since I usually just stay in my room surfing the internet. Guild Master doesn’t interfere with what I do on my computer at all, he's careless……. Haha.」 「Therefore……. It’s like I’m secretly dating you guys. Cheating, essentially…….」 「Even though it’s just online!」 「But cheating is still cheating.」 「Doesn’t that make sense?」 「Answer, please.」 By this point, despite the viewers' heads having already burst, they continued to explode further. A secret relationship? Isn't that usually what V-tubers hide from ‘us,’ doing it in ‘reality’ behind the scenes? Why us, a secret relationship? Why us, the target of cheating? How does this logic even work? How? 「Hehe! I’ll stream on Christmas too. I hope he discovers me hidden dating….. on Christmas.」 Viewers realized. This. Was beyond. Human comprehension. -We’ve never dated someone like you, damn it 「Gosh. So harsh. Why so mean, brother? Last time you were super generous with the super chat……. Chatting is like exchanging love letters, isn’t it? Between me and you.」 「I’ve saved them all.」 「I'll show them to Guild Master…….」 -Ahhhhh -Crazy, crazy, crazy -Run away wtf They couldn't escape. On Christmas Day. 「Ta-da!」 「Oh. What's this, Ah-ryeon?」 From the speaker, a male voice emerged that the viewers heard for the first time. Despite an event unfolding that could set all related communities ablaze, titled ‘Real Male Voice Appearing on a V-tuber Broadcast.’ The chat room was silent. Dead silent. It wasn’t normal. But before discussing abnormal, even today’s broadcast title wasn’t normal. 『Goryeochan』 goryeochan_ra_vtuber The core member of the Regression Alliance! The rightful owner of Pyongyang, Northern Saint, everyone's sweetheart, Goryeo-chan♡ 『(●LIVE) Christmas Boyfriend Grand Reveal』 A title so absurd, one could imagine something so intensely dopamine-inducing would squeeze the brain as if something forbidden were being extracted. Pure entertainment. No, pure chaos. Every viewer was united, fervently praying for the unnamed boyfriend, for Guild Master-ssi, to just flee! One might wonder, why not just turn off the broadcast and ignore it? But that was impossible. Miss out on this highly entertaining event? Resist this? -Guild Master, your voice is nice… -Run away, run away, run away, run away -Initially, greetings, your girlfriend keeps wielding a knife and threatening us; if it's not too much trouble, could you take her away, please? -So the saint’s name is Ah-ryeon Current viewers, a staggering 160,000. A record-breaking number. It truly seemed fitting for the finale of the year for a villain who had ignited countless communities and shorts since the shocking '100 Billion Debut.' 「It’s my broadcast!」 「Broadcast?」 「Yes! You see, I’ve actually been broadcasting for the past year. A V-tuber. Since you’re an otaku too, Guild Master, you get it, right?」 「…….」 「Hehe. Look at this! There are 160,000 viewers! I’m super popular. Just a moment, Guild Master. I need to greet the paladins who are watching!」 「…….」 「Ah- hello, my beloved paladins? Today is Christmas. I sincerely thank you for visiting to love me on this most holy day.」 The viewers couldn't recall when she started referring to them as ‘beloved paladins.’ Truly couldn’t recall. Wasn't insulting and swearing at others in rotation the daily norm? Even the loyal viewers since the 100 Billion Debut were just now realizing their fandom name was ‘Paladins.’ 「To show my gratitude to you all……. I’ve prepared something special! An ASMR microphone!」 「Hold on. I had it all set up, but I just need to tweak the settings for a moment. Oh. Got it.」 「Everyone.」 「Whaaa.」 「I love yo-……」 Before she even finished saying ‘I love you.’ 「Oh~」 Sounded oddly pleased. 「Oh. Ahaha, aha. Gi-Guild Master. Your face right now. Oh, your face……. Hwah~」 A sound of something clattering and crashing. 「Me-Merry Christmas! This is my gift to you, Guild Master……. S-surprised? Right?」 And then. A moment later. 『This broadcast has ended due to community guideline violations.』 Everything fell silent. And that was the ‘Christmas Retirement Live’ of the thunderous newcomer V-tuber, Goryeo-chan. Strangely, from the next day, any recordings or videos related to it began to vanish without a trace―. Thus leaving the final moments of a broadcaster only to be remembered in legends. ---TL NOTE: All of this happened through an asmr mic btw lol.--- 17. "Ah-ryeon." "Yes, Great Witch……." "Undertaker." "……." "Answer." "Yes." "Alright. The only Undertaker I recognize is the one kneeling before me, but my goodness. You've gone and hired hundreds of internet undertakers?" "I’m sorry……." "Must I deal with this from Christmas? Huh? Do you know how busy Yo-il and I've been?" "I'm sorry……." "Enough. Drop that absurd possessiveness concept already! I get it! I understand! I know how much you care for us, so ease off a bit! Will you?" "Yes." "Ah-ryeon, you are prohibited from using the internet for the next year." "Hieeek!" Sim Ah-ryeon, internet confiscated. This, too, was thanks to the Great Witch’s grace. "Haah." Having spent the past few days erasing traces from the internet, Dang Seo-rin exhaled wearily. This accursed household, or rather shiphold, never had a quiet day! From the outsiders’ perspective, the ‘Goryeo-chan commotion’ might have seemed like an extraordinary event. It was extraordinary, indeed. If someone had to go through this in their lifetime, it would usually be the climax of their last battle. But within this damned shiphold, it was merely akin to the first battle of Koopa. Just the week before last, Dang Seo-rin had to handle an incident called ‘Baihua Yao Lan’, and the week before, endure the wretched event of the ‘Great Debate! Philosophy Battle,’ and the week before that…… Dang Seo-rin held her forehead. Despite having expended so much mental energy, she didn’t feel a sense of closure. She was somehow confident that these crazy occurrences would continue, relentlessly. It was the kind of riotous tale that could fill nearly 200 chapters of a novel, yet one that no one would wish to narrate. "Hey. Undertaker. Aren’t we arriving at the northern Mediterranean around January or February?" "Yeah. Right. We’re supposed to visit Venice at that time too." The Undertaker’s voice was meek. Even a renowned obsessive could become subdued in this situation. "So. Um……." Dang Seo-rin calculated quietly. The mobile maritime fortress city's final defense ark, BusaN, was in full sail. Occasionally, the members would split into groups traveling by land or sea. Nevertheless, the world tour was progressing smoothly. "Could you spare me some time during that period?" "Hm? You mean just the two of us?" "Yes. Honestly, I've been working really hard lately, so if I tell the others, they’d probably agree……." "No." The Undertaker replied. Though his voice was still low, there was a wry smile mixed in. "I can’t always make you bear the burden alone. Getting permission from the others is my job." Between January and February, Venice. At that time, the Carnival would be held. It was winter.