Chapter 51 - The Girl Wants to Be M*rdered

**Chapter 51: Truth** If someone were to ask me what my position at the Academy—specifically Museion—was, I doubt I could give them a straightforward answer. But if they insisted on an answer, after a long and contemplative pause, I might say "mercenary." ...It's just so ambiguous. Though I was a student officially affiliated with Museion, I was exempt from the financial burdens typical students carried, like paying tuition fees. Instead, I received a regular salary, almost like a wage. You could say, in exchange, I was compelled to lead or conduct certain classes. Like now, for example. "—Therefore, today, we'll start by listening to Hahn's student explanation and proceed with the lesson by referencing the book." "...Alright." By now, having anticipated this, I cautiously pushed back my chair and stood up, making sure not to make any noise. Eyes. Eyes. Eyes. Ten pairs of eyes bore down on me, and I forced my trembling legs to carry me forward. 'Sis... Are you really okay...?' 'Hehe! Don't worry, Alice. Just trust this sister!!' '...That scar.' Alice's worried expression as she saw me off lingered in my mind, along with the image of Saeli staring disdainfully at my bravado from behind. Honestly, it seemed like there was no further to fall, but as Alice's older sister, I couldn't show any weakness, so I had confidently reassured her back then. Little did I know I was about to ride a rollercoaster straight to hell. So, if I could go back to that moment and say something...? ...Hmm. —Alice, save me...!!! —The part where I said I was okay, all lies...!! —I want to go back...!! ...might be what I'd say. Truly. Why did I leave my beloved Alice and venture out alone? Since coming here, every day I lament my past choices, constantly questioning why I did it, but time doesn't rewind. History doesn't entertain "Ifs." There's only the "Will" of having to conduct this class... Only the future where I'd be doomed...!! "...Uh... Ahem, firstly, mercenaries often consist of skilled troops requiring high proficiency and expertise, like cavalry or archers, as their main group. The well-known Boa Cavalry is one such example." Uweuweuweuwe... I wasn't sure what I was saying, but I pressed on with a steely expression, struggling to steady my trembling voice. Was the volume alright at this level? Yes...It had to be, right? Glancing around nervously, I gulped down my nerves, afraid someone might notice my wavering and quickening speech. Even if the teacher beside me noticed everything. Her face, feigning indifference and maintaining the cool gaze of a disciplined educator, slightly betrayed her inner amusement through her barely upturned eyes and lips. Earning money was indeed a challenging endeavor. A powerful wave of realization washed over me, one I hadn't felt before in my life. "They don’t count the lancers individually but group them by 'lance' in units and actually contract them in 'lance' units. The reason for this is... to support a single lancer, at least five assistants and attendants are needed—" """............""" The attention was overwhelming. Honestly, I had only just reached my first year as a novice. Honestly, it felt embarrassing to be called a mercenary. Honestly, because the mercenaries my age were troublesome, opportunities came my way by default. Maybe it was the charm of the "mercenary" title, but whenever I took the podium, the intense stares from the crowd only increased my burden. I’d only joined the Academy, thinking it was an easy-peasy position, based on advice from seniors who said it was a breeze. There was a reason they all waved me off with smiles...! Even amid the internal turmoil, there was something else eating away at me more intensely. "............" This way and that, all around. Someone was observing me intently, as if searching for something hidden within me. It might be an overreaction, but based on my experiences, my instincts insisted it was true. She was watching me, closely. That pair of eyes, half-open with indifference, what were they so desperately trying to find in me? Depending on the person, such attention might be welcome, even delightful. But since the first time I met her, an uneasy premonition had taken root in my heart, making her scrutiny anything but welcome. When I learned she would be in the same classroom I was to enter, I was both startled and anxious. And I was certain Alice should never meet her. Because her name was Remi Acaia. The princess of the Kingdom of Tessilia and a fellow student at the Academy. And— —Alice’s, true family. "...The term Freelancer was coined from this concept—" A shiver ran down my spine. Why did nothing in life come easy? I harbored countless complaints in my heart, forcing myself to continue the lesson. For the record. I found relief only after ten minutes had passed. Sniff. ** At such an ungodly hour when good children like Alice would have long succumbed to sleep, adults like me—neither good nor young—wandered through the damp and chilly night air, their feet brushing against dewy grass. Walking aimlessly wherever the path led, without a destination, and without conviction. "...You probably have an idea of what I'm going to say, right?" "......." Except for the chirping of insects, the forest at dawn was eerily quiet. The stillness was so perfect that breaking it seemed wasteful. In that silence, it was I who first spoke. After all, I was the one who woke her and brought her here. The ruthless beast who mercilessly devoured the villagers that had once attacked Alice. And the one Alice affectionately called 'Sister Elli', treating like her own family. Saeli. She stood beside me now. "—Tell me, Saeli. No, please. Explain to me what happened to Alice in the past." I asked her with a mix of anger, fear, and sorrow. "......." Yet, she didn't react to my question at all, simply gazing up into the sky. Her face, resigned to fate, as if the inevitable had finally arrived. Staring into the cloudy night sky, painted a deep gray, Saeli searched for invisible stars. It was a standoff between her and me. The events leading up to this confrontation began when Alice and I were taking a bath together. It's embarrassing to admit, but I had been learning basic swordsmanship from Alice, who had some physical challenges. When she first offered to teach me swordsmanship, I watched with half-concern, half-skepticism. But seeing Alice's swordplay—with the sword appearing almost alive—I was instantly captivated. Before I knew it, I was doing push-ups under her instruction. ...After all, I had my dreams too. The graceful slash, the precise swoosh of the sword. Even though she wielded the sword with just one hand, not appearing powerful, the sharp trajectories of her weapon were polished enough that even a novice like me could see her skill. The one executing the moves seemed surprised at her own proficiency, as if thinking, 'I guess I can do this?' Well, somehow, that was our arrangement. From then on, it became routine. To prepare for unexpected situations, Saeli was present as a chaperone while I absorbed Alice's instruction and steadily improved. Her teachings were thorough and clear, enough for a beginner like me to easily follow. Training often translates to sweat and hardship, right? So naturally, both Alice and I would be drenched in sweat by the end of each practice. Usually, Alice would bathe first while I stayed a bit longer for extra practice, and then I'd go in. But that day was different. We were both exhausted, so we decided to end training early and bathe together. Although Alice wanted to let me bathe first, worried that I'd be put off by seeing her body, I insisted it was fine and took her hand into the bath— And that became the start of it all. "...The bumpy texture of the wrist. Up close, it was clearly a 'bite' mark. And the things Alice had mentioned from the past." "......." "I don't want to believe it, but I'm willing to listen." Of course, saying I hadn't prepared myself would be a lie. I was well aware that Alice was missing a wrist since we had been living together. I also knew there were countless scars hidden beneath her clothes, engraved in my mind from long ago. So, I thought I'd be okay. But, as usual, I was foolish and an uncontrollable idiot. The first moment. Seeing Alice completely exposed in front of me, all my previous resolves vanished, and my mind went blank, unable to process anything. My body, hugging Alice tightly from behind to prevent her from seeing my face, felt almost admirable. '...Sister?' '...Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry.' Scars, Scars, And more scars. Everywhere, riddled with scars. Even as Alice called my name softly, I feared she might detect the quiver in my voice and refrained from answering, instead holding her in silence. Murmuring apologies that would never reach her. It was heart-wrenching and tragic. Why...why had this happened? That question wouldn't leave my mind. The scar that ran through her midsection and across her back—I couldn't even imagine the events that might have led to such a mark on a child. Her calf had a gaping void, where the flesh had been gouged, clearly visible to the naked eye. And when I saw the bite marks, vividly imprinted on her wrist, I realized I'd opened a Pandora's box that should have remained shut. The wounds I saw—so plainly in front of me—hit me with a force that was staggering. To the extent that I instinctively wanted to turn my head away. '......!!' I struggled desperately to quell the rising nausea. After a prolonged internal battle, when I finally came to my senses, my gaze was fixed elsewhere, not at Alice's body. Perhaps it was fortunate Alice didn't realize I had averted my eyes from her body, as she remained nestled in my embrace. Indeed. I had, once again, repeated the same mistake as before. Thus, I needed to know. To ensure I would not repeat that mistake again. Even if what I was about to uncover was a part of an endless abyss. I needed to know. "Tell me everything." "........" About Alice's past. **