567 - I Was Genderswapped and Reincarnated as a Villainess, but I’m Making this My Personal Yuri Game

Chapter 567: "Mentally...?" "Haaaahhhhh..." A deep sigh escapes from me without permission. Even if I wanted to stop, I couldn’t. Regret swirls violently, resurfacing every time something reminds me, causing sighs to spill forth. "Sakuya-kun... Are you still bothered by it?" "Didn't it happen several days ago?" "Nobody saw it, and I'm sure they've forgotten by now." "...Haaaaaaaahhhhh..." Everyone in the group offers their words of comfort, but nothing lifts the cloud over my mood. I pulled off something outrageous a few days ago. Urged on by Azami and Hozuki, I did something as scandalous as fanning my skirt in the cafeteria... And what on earth was I thinking at the time? Was there even a point where I thought that feeling of liberation was worth letting a guy see the spats under my skirt? Thinking it over, it’s horrifying that I was able to accept something so disgraceful so easily. I can't help but wonder if I've lost my mind. Even if I’m wearing spats or tights under my skirt, or even gym shorts, the idea of a guy seeing under it is utterly unacceptable. It's not about being safe because I'm wearing pants – having a guy see something he's not supposed to under my skirt is something I'm deeply averse to. Yet, back then, I didn't care and fanned my skirt all around. That act... is dangerous. Fanning a skirt... It’s a devil's temptation that entices women! It wasn’t just Azami or Hozuki being improper. Once one experiences that pleasure, the impulse to do it again is irresistible. Even I, filled with such intense regret and disgust, find myself wanting to do it again! "Everyone... you must never do such a thing... Once you know that sensation, you'll forget about propriety or being watched, and you'll seek it out again. It's... a terrifying devil's temptation..." I've already been ensnared by the devil. For Azami and Hozuki, it's likely too late. But at least, I hope to warn other group members against falling for that devil. "Umm... Sakuya-kun?" "It might be improper, but..." "I think every girl has done it at least once?" "I do it often at home!" "Wha... What?!" Could it be that everyone has already fallen victim to that diabolical pleasure? Does this mean... my sweet angelic friends have been sullied by the devil's temptation? "Even if it's improper, when we're children, we end up doing it anyway, right?" "Most kids stop doing it naturally as they grow up." "Azami's just special." "Wait, Satsuki! What do you mean by that?" "Exactly what I said." "What was that?!" "Now, now, both of you, calm down..." Azami and Satsuki start their usual banter. Although Seri tries to mediate, I can't help but feel these three are similar to the trio of Hozuki and her friends. If that's the case, then maybe Suzuran and Satsuki share a similar role, though their personalities and behaviors are completely different. However, these two groups do bear some resemblances. "So basically... you all couldn't resist it when you were young, but now you're proper ladies who resist the urge, are you not? Haaaahhhhh..." Another unbidden sigh escapes me. They've experienced such things as children, but as they matured, they learned those actions were improper and stopped. Compared to them, I began doing such things long after everyone else had stopped, and what's worse, I got hooked on it, incapable of stopping myself from unconsciously wanting to do it again... Which reveals just how weak my mental constitution is... "Aaahhhhhh!!!" "Whoa!?" "Sakuya-sama!" "Is everything alright?!" As I let out a bizarre yell and started tugging at my hair, everyone worriedly rushed to stop me. But it's no use. Why am I so weak-minded? I can't stop scandalously fanning my skirt just to gain a little relief from the heat... Even though everyone else overcame this at a young age and I'm already in my second year of middle school, yet I haven't managed to overcome it... How can I be so mentally frail? I'm still so immature... To address this juvenile mindset... There's only one person I can rely on! "I'm leaving early." "Huh?" "Sakuya-kun, are you feeling unwell after all?" "Should I go with you?" "No, it's alright... Sorry for worrying you... But the next time you see me... I'll have grown mentally by leaps and bounds! Please wait until then!" "Ah!" "Sakuya-sama!" Ignoring the concerned voices of my friends as they attempted to reach out to me, I dashed out of the classroom. While everyone else has matured mentally so much, I'm simply incompetent... Being around them, I would only hold them back. Even if the game scenario painted me as the leader of the 'Sakuya-kun's Group' in namesake, in reality, I was just a hindrance, causing nothing but trouble and holding everyone back. Because I assumed being slightly athletic would suffice, I deluded myself into thinking otherwise. I was merely an arrogant, immature fool. "A healthy mind in a healthy body" was just something I believed without reason. But mentally, I had grown not at all. I finally realized I was a fool, a coward, and emotionally weak. But I don't have to give up. I have a reliable person to turn to. If I can't solve it alone, I should rely on someone else. I already learned this lesson. "First, I’ll get the car from home..." Wait... Isn't resorting to car travel for something like this what's ruining me? I'll contact both my home and my reliable mentor, then run to the dojo. Yes, that's what I should do. "Kujo Sakuya, leaving early." "Huh?! Wha?" I entered the staff room, informed them I’d be leaving early, and briskly exited the academy. After contacting the reliable adult, my mentor, I ran all the way to the dojo. The dojo was likely about 5000 meters away. Even covering just that distance took me over fourteen minutes, and I was considerably out of breath. It was a testament to my inadequacies. Assuming it was indeed 5000 meters, the world record stands around twelve minutes and thirty seconds. The Japanese record is a little over thirteen minutes. The record for Japanese women is just under fifteen minutes, if I’m not mistaken... Given that Master Momochi is training me, I should aim to break thirteen minutes at the very least. If I can’t achieve that, I have no right to call myself a disciple of the Momochi style. I must at least impose such a goal upon myself. "Hmm... I was curious when you called so suddenly... Did something happen?" "Hah... Hah... Master... I'm sorry for the abruptness... But I have realized my own immaturity..." Upon arriving at the dojo, Master was waiting for me as I had informed him over the phone. After catching my breath slightly, I sat before him and bowed my head. "I was arrogant, merely because I had partaken in training under the Momochi style! I am still mentally immature and have grasped nothing properly! I believed a sound mind dwelt within a sound body, but that was a mistake! As long as my mind remains immature, no matter how much guidance I receive from Master Momochi Sandayu, it will be for naught! I finally understand this. The foolishness within me is embarrassing..." "Hmm... So, you wish to intensify your mental training, then?" "Yes! In my current spoiled state, I cannot progress any further!" Bowing deeply with my forehead to the floor, I begged Master. Perhaps someone as immature as I wasn’t suited to be a disciple of the Momochi style in the first place. Though Master hasn’t abandoned me, nurturing even my immature self, there’s always the possibility he was truly appalled by my ineptness. "Master! Please, grant this weak-hearted and mentally immature disciple further training!" "Indeed! Well said! Then I shall ensure your mind is trained more rigorously from now on!" "Thank you!" Raising my head at Master's words, I saw him nodding approvingly. Master must have already known about my mental immaturity. But he was waiting for me to realize it myself and take the initiative to request further training. Finally, I was standing at the starting line! "I shall make preparations for the training. In the meantime, change into suitable attire." "Yes, sir!" Alright! I will work hard to at least reach the same level as everyone else! * * * Usually, I arrive at the dojo by car, with Momiji preparing my clothes and training attire. Today, having unexpectedly run there alone, I had nothing prepared. Fortunately, spare clothes are kept in the dressing room for occasions like today. I made do with them and changed. "Are you ready? Let's go." "Yes, sir!" Following Master’s instruction, we headed to the backyard, where... "First, walk across the top of this bed of sword-like spikes." "Yes, sir!" As directed by Master, I walked barefoot across a path lined with what looked like spears. Even though it seemed daunting, I trusted Master and began crossing. Meanwhile, to my side, Master was creating a roaring bonfire, something that made me uneasy. Could it possibly be...? "Your mind is unsettled! Do not allow yourself to be distracted!" "I apologize!" Chastised by Master, I concentrated on walking across the spikes. As I traversed back and forth several times, Master finally called me over when preparations were complete. "Next, come here." "Yes, Master!" In front of Master were stones, recently aglow within the blazing fire, now lined up. Could it be...? "Next, walk slowly across these." "Huh... Yes..." Swallowing hard, I nodded. Walking barefoot through a bonfire or across heated stones was a known training method. I had done it before. But this... today's session was on a whole different level. The stones were extremely hot. Usually, such practices, while appearing intimidating and fiery, were tolerably warm. They might appear grand and heated yet are often orchestrated to not cause severe burns, for safety reasons. Even so, it takes courage to step into them, making it effective for mental fortitude. But this... these stones today were genuinely scorching hot. If I lingered on them, my skin might burn and peel, sticking to the stones. "What are you hesitating for! Are you scared?" "No, Master! ...I'm going!" The instant my foot touched the stone, it sizzled. Looking down was forbidden. I needed to focus on the sole task of walking slowly across. "Ahh, ahh, ahh, aaah! Hah... Hah..." Somehow… I managed to reach the other side. Though my soles were throbbing intensely, the dread of what they might look like crossed my mind... I could faint from the shock. "Still too soft! You hopeless disciple! You lack focus! Such mental training is useless!" "I-I’m sorry!" I apologized, bowing my head in shame. Indeed, I might have rushed, wanting to cross swiftly. Such haste negates the point of mental training. "Never mind! Next, we will try this!" "Yes, sir! ...Huh?" Suddenly my limbs were bound tightly by Master... "There you go." With a splash, I was tossed into the backyard pond. This was... 'Do not escape the bindings! Endure until I pull you up!' Despite being underwater, Master's voice resounded clearly. I had previously been thrown into the pond with instructions to escape the bindings, but this time it was different. I was to endure underwater until Master decided to pull me up—without untying myself despite being able to. This challenge was truly daunting. My breath wouldn’t last indefinitely. Under normal circumstances, if I were able, I would surface before my breath ran out. However, I must endure until Master pulls me out. When that might be—one minute, five minutes? Ten? I couldn’t predict. Escaping the ropes to surface for a breath wouldn’t be difficult. It’s not difficult at all. These bindings were relatively simple to slip out of. But I endured, submerged in the murky depths until Master deemed it time to pull me out. The mental strain was far greater than anticipated. "Time’s up... Here." "Haah! Haah! Haah!" How long had I been submerged in that pond? It felt both like a fleeting moment and an eternity. Somehow, I resisted the urge to slip free of the bindings and surface for air, enduring until Master decided to pull me out. But now... "Alright, the stones should be ready. Walk across them again. This time, slower." "—! Y-yes, sir!" It seemed my mental fortitude was still reliant on comfort. I foolishly hoped that would be the end, only for Master to see through my softness and assign me further training. Everyone, wait for me! I'll train my spirit and become a mature adult, worthy of standing by your side without embarrassment!