110 - Upki Girl

< We Do Not Need a Feminist > "So you’re saying you're going to air that part as is?" "We’ll mute the swearing for the main broadcast, but upload the uncut version online... but first, I need to hit the restroom." "Oh, yes. Go ahead." After returning from the restroom, he lowered his voice as he tossed the damp paper towel into the trash. "Frankly, what I was hoping for was for Lara and Yona to face off in the round of 16, but it turns out Hong isn't a bad matchup either." "But they're both on the same Dante team, aren't they?" The PD snapped his fingers. "That's what makes it interesting. You need a bit of friendly fire in women's fights." "Seriously though, Hong barely made it to the round of 16 because she's weak against disses, so take it easy on her. I want her to showcase her real skills at least once." "Hahaha, the train's already left the station. Dante isn't clueless about broadcasting, and since it looks like they'll end up facing off in the round of 16, get ready and good luck. By the way, I don't care for sites like Ilbe or Megal either. I'll head inside first." "Yeah, take care." As he headed towards the studio, I bid him farewell and made my way to the waiting room where Hong and Yona were getting their makeup touched up. Yona and the stylists were comforting Hong, who seemed deflated. Look at that, she's lost a bit of cheek fat in just this short time. After listening to Jang Woo, it seemed like he had just explained what Lara's rap was about and what this anti-male sentiment thing is. However, Hong wasn't interested in any of that; she was simply blaming herself for messing up the cypher. Considering the heavy prejudices against girl-group rappers, forgetting her lyrics and not even trying must have worried her. "Honghong unnie, it's alright. It's not even the actual performance, so what does it matter? And judging by that person, she can't rap either and seems to be pushing her way through with her character. You're not at a level to lose to her. You could beat her with just your sleep talk." The styling director expressed her displeasure and added, "But seriously, who does she think she is? Who is she to claim she's representing women and talk so arrogantly? It's ridiculous. Hong, go show her up." Despite the encouragement from the two, Hong didn't lift her head. Staring at the ground, she turned to me to apologize. "I'm, I'm sorry, Director... The team's image might suffer when this gets broadcast." "Hey, what's the big deal? Like Yona said, you weren’t eliminated or anything, so why worry? You’re not the only one who’s ever made a mistake. Overcome it at the main performance." "But I'm really not confident with disses... I can't do it." "If you don't want to do it, you don’t have to. This isn’t a dissing show, after all. Just do the rap you want to do." "But I'm sure there’s an image they want from me on the broadcast..." That's true. What PD Joo wants is a mudslinging match between a Megal and a typical woman. However, from the preliminaries, Hong never resorted to rapping that slanders others. The central theme of Hong’s rap was none other than ‘happiness’ and ‘hope.’ Even during the final round, where they set the stage to encourage dissing your rivals, she stood out to mentor Dante with her decent rap about humility, her inherent vocal talent, and her sharp pronunciation that resonated with listeners. Take Yona, for example, who knows how to separate her personal and professional life. She distinguishes between the person Lee Yona and the celebrity persona, acting out what the audience and production team want. That’s why, even though she isn't a professional rapper, she agreed to appear, playing along with rivals’ disses and confidently performing twerking dances with sultry expressions even when aware that it might make other contestants resentful. That's the character the Girl Crush production team expects from her. Moreover, it's a tool to elevate Upkick Girl's recognition. Surely, Hong also has experience from internet broadcasts. In fact, those days of mimicking pigs and being treated less than human during her online streaming days were harsher. Yet, Hong felt more comfortable in that space. At least, that wasn’t acting or pretending—it was merely one aspect of her passive and self-doubting identity. However, to express anger at others or curse at those she feels no emotion towards would be an act that deviates from her identity, something excessively bewildering for the inherently kind Hong. Even if it meant abandoning the image the production wanted, as her manager, I needed to comfort Hong first. "Hong, let’s not force yourself into something that doesn't fit. Do the rap you want. A rap about happiness and a future-driven message. Or, how about this perspective?" Finally, as Hong looked up at me, I continued to speak. "Do you think Lara God is normal?" After some thought, Hong replied, "Honestly, I don't think it's my place to judge whether she's normal or not. I just think she’s probably a sister who’s in a lot of pain, that’s all." Of course, you're a very understanding kid. "Alright, how about this? Think of Lara God as a sister who's hurting and give her some comforting advice. Like you do with Seowon, remember? Whenever Seowon throws a fit at you, you knock her flat and then say it, like—take a deep breath, there you go, it's all fine, everything will be alright—those things?" Understanding the scenario, Yona, Jang Woo, and the stylist let out a soft chuckle. A slight smile spread across Hong's face as well. "Do you get what I'm suggesting?" “Yes…” "Try writing your lyrics like that. You don’t even have to mention things like Megal or anti-male sentiment—it’s more than enough. How about advocating for a world where we uplift each other rather than cut each other down?" "I think that could work." *** As PD Joo anticipated, Dante opted for ratings over team unity, setting Hong and Lara God against each other in the round of 16. The production team, realizing that it might be a hit upon recording, overturned the original format of proceeding to the semifinals without an audience, deciding instead to invite 200 spectators from the round of 16 onwards for on-site voting. The adjustment pushed the Round of 16 performance back to five days later than originally scheduled. Yona and Hong each wrote their lyrics over the beats provided by their mentors. As part of the preparation, interview videos and the recording process were filmed. Given that the performance would be live with an audience, a new task was added to create an additional song as a team, rather than just one-on-one battles. Since Hong and Lara were on the same team, they inevitably had to face each other at Dante’s recording studio. “Hey, Dante!” “Hello!” “Hey, what’s up, Hong?” Dante and a man who appeared to be an engineer were smoking by the entrance to the studio, connected to the parking lot. I gently stepped back to let Hong and Dante have their chat. “Did you finish the lyrics?” “Yes.” “And practice?” “I practiced a lot.” “Oh, confidence! Good, good. Your style today is also on point. Have you been shooting something?” “Oh, I had an event.” “Pretty, pretty. I even searched for Upkick Girl reaction pics because of you.” “Really? Thank you.” He knows Upkick Girl? I saw an opportunity to put in a word. “Our girls are preparing for a mini-album right now.” “Oh, really?” “We’re thinking of leading with a track focused on Hong’s rap. Could you compose something if you have the time?” "What style are you looking for?" “We’ll adapt our style to Dante’s signature sound.” “I’ve never done an idol track before...” “This could be your chance.” With a blend of humor and seriousness, Dante replied with a smile. “If Hong wins, I’ll whip up something fantastic.” “Hong, let’s win." “Uh…” “Ha, ha, it’s cold. You can go down first. I’ll finish this smoke…” “Alright.” As I was about to head underground, Dante added, “Oh, Kang Baek-ho is down there.” Seems like we all think alike. Apparently, Lara God has been unofficially nicknamed Kang Baek-ho. “Kang Baek-ho...?” Seeing Hong’s confusion, I explained. “Lara God.” “Oh…” This was the first encounter since the recording two days prior. As it turns out, Lara God was already a known figure among anti-male activists and self-proclaimed fervent feminists. She had gained media attention two years ago following the unprovoked murder of a high school girl by a homeless man at Seoul Station, through a solo protest with the slogan "Stop Misogynistic Crimes!" She capitalized on the fame to launch fundraising campaigns by producing T-shirts and bags inscribed with feminist slogans. Originally, she was active on Megal, but as PD Joo mentioned, she currently runs and participates in a secret site called ‘Hannam Phobia.’ I realized I had heard of this ‘Hannam Phobia’ group before. Two months prior, it had become a social media sensation when the members engaged in a 12-hour relay comment battle against a Maximum Top-top member named Si-hyun, and most participating members were revealed to be from there. “Despite her reputation, she seemed more normal than expected when I talked to her,” Dante said sensing Hong's and my tension. “Really?” “It seemed like she was just acting according to a concept during the recording.” “Well, that’s a relief.” Normal my foot. As if it's just a broadcast concept. “Hello.” “Hi, unnie.” “Hello.” As Hong and I greeted Lara God upon entering the recording studio, she stood up from where she was looking over her lyrics on the couch. Even in the dead of winter, Lara wore hot pants, fully exposing a colorful, Japanese-style tattoo that covered one of her legs. It wasn't a stocking pattern; it seemed to be a real tattoo. I couldn’t help but stare briefly but realized it was impolite and quickly diverted my gaze. “What are you looking at?” “Pardon?” “You just committed visual harassment on my leg, didn’t you?” When we exchanged cheerful greetings, who would have guessed she'd change her demeanor and say that? Who wouldn’t look at a leg fully covered in a colored tattoo? “Oh, I was looking at the tattoo, not the leg... I apologize if it offended you.” “So, my tattoo isn’t a part of my leg? You're speaking as if it's okay to observe the tattoo. It's inked on my body, you know?” Ugh, how annoying. “Sorry about that.” Not wanting a prolonged conversation, I apologized again. But then, as if mumbling to herself, she muttered, “All these perverted Korean men in heat all year round, don’t know when to stop…” In the recording studio, where tensions can easily rise, I tried to keep things amicable by apologizing. And what do I get in return? This level of absurdity is unprecedented. Withholding is foolishness. “What is your deal, exactly? Making such leaps over a glance at a peculiar tattoo? I didn’t mean to say this, but what do I gain from looking at your leg?” “Why did you look at it then? What are you planning to achieve by doing so?” “I said it was the tattoo!” “You did agree that the tattoo was on my leg, though?” “That’s not what I meant—... Wow! Wow!” I let out a reflexive exclamation. Is this a hot sauna at Dobong Mountain or a studio in the heart of Gangnam? It’s so frustrating and baffling that I feel as if I’ve stepped into a hot stone sauna, making me breathe heavily. This person is something else. Do you understand the kind of blood pressure I have? It's the kind that would withstand the highest peak in Korea, thanks to being seasoned by Seowon, my steel-clad blood pressure trained under the tug-of-war of victim mentality and emotional reasoning. And yet, within mere minutes, this person has pushed it to the max. “Apologize before I report this as sexual harassment. I don’t want to waste any more emotional energy dealing with a Korean man.” “I already apologized. Twice, with sincerity. But you’re the one mocking with all this ‘typical Korean man’ and ‘in heat’ talk. How do you function daily? If you claim harassment over this, how do you manage on the subway or in coffee shops? If you’re this sensitive to looks, maybe you should just wear a hijab and stop troubling everyone.” “What are you implying? That women’s clothes are the problem? That's a typical rapist's argument.” Damn!! Damn it!! Hong, this isn’t going to work. Bring me a hammer. Smashing her yap shut and going to jail might be the better option. “Well, go on then, call the police.” “Why are you being so informal?” “Hey. You think I'm going to keep showing respect when I’m being accused of being a rapist just by standing here? And you dropped formalities with my girl just because you’re older, didn’t you?” “Get it straight. Standing still but staring at a leg is still a fact. I felt uncomfortable.” “Then how do you even function? You think the world revolves around you? Why would I even look at your leg? Why?” “Korean men raising their voice when they’re losing; typical.” “This one’s absolutely off her rocker.” “Yeah, like your dad.” “You crazy...!” “Director, please don't...” I never thought I’d get dragged into such idiotic, petty arguing. If Hong hadn’t stopped me, I swear I would have gone for that piercing in her philtrum with my elbow. “Wow, seriously. I’ve heard of ‘Megal, Megal’ but never thought it was this bad.” “‘Megal’ is so old news. If you’re going to bash, at least know what you’re bashing, Korean man.” “Uh, unnie, our director really isn’t like that.” Hong’s words had no effect. “Poor girl, you’re too young to know, but there’s no such thing as a Korean man who isn’t. They even get aroused looking at their daughters’ legs—that’s a typical trait.” Hong and I said simultaneously, “This one's really out of her mind.” “Looks like you might need psychiatric help. Want me to recommend where I go?” “You brat?” —Click. Dante entered along with the engineer and a rapper named Rosha, who was one of the participants. “What’s going on here? Are you two at it again?” Dante asked Hong while looking at the scene, and Hong provided a different answer. “Mentor, can I scrap the solo lyrics I wrote and rewrite them?” “Why? I think they’re pretty good.” “I’m thinking of doing a diss track instead. I can finish it in a day.” ‘We Do Not Need a Feminist’ This was the moment the iconic track was born, elevating Hong to the rising queen of the hip-hop scene and securing her position as the number one “girl group member you’d want as a girlfriend.” < We Do Not Need a Feminist > The End