124 - Upki Girl

< Is This the Land of the Legendary Controllers? > Underneath a low table. It’s a blind spot where you can’t easily see the person sitting next to you unless you really try. Moreover, with a wall behind me, the risk of someone else spotting us is even less. That’s why Jaehui probably acted so boldly. But the opponent was Seowon. It might be due to a natural defense mechanism against others, but Seowon tends to instinctively lean back when sitting across from someone she's not close with. She sits upright, about a palm's length away from the table. Which means she has a wider field of vision to see under the table than most. Therefore. She ended up witnessing Jaehui’s toes, wrapped in white socks, slithering like a snake to touch my shin in this fleeting yet scandalous scene. Caught, caught, caught — oh no, caught, damn it, caught, I say! I wished it was my imagination, but Seowon glanced at both Jaehui and me, and let out a brief, ironic chuckle. Jaehui, pretending not to notice Seowon’s reaction, or maybe genuinely not noticing, carried on with her own distractions. While flipping meat with her hands and eyes, she was half-heartedly reacting to her team members’ stories with exclamations of “Oh, really? Truly?” all the while wriggling her toes persistently against my leg. It was multitasking at the level of Jaedong, controlling dual forces from different regions in a game. Here’s the question. What was Jaehui’s intention behind this dangerous act? 1. Pouting because I refused her drink offering. 2. To incite jealousy in Seowon or Riya. 3. A thrill seeker who derives excitement from risky actions. 4. Simply stretching her foot absently, my leg just happened to be there. 5. To hint at our intimate relationship. Considering the Jaehui I’ve known, it’s likely either option 1 or 3. That’s also what I hope for. If it turns out she was trying to incite jealousy in Seowon or Riya, I might be somewhat disappointed in Jaehui. This brings us to the second question. Given that her action has now been exposed to Seowon, what should be Kim Yoonho’s course of action? 1. Continue pretending not to feel anything on my leg. 2. Subtly move my leg away from Jaehui’s foot without drawing attention and act as if nothing happened. 3. Call it out: “Jaehui, you’re touching my leg,” to assert my innocence. 4. Take Seowon aside and explain my relationship with Jaehui. 5. Flee. A blend of option 1 and 2 seemed best. First, carefully remove my leg, and if Seowon later brings it up, I can simply claim, “Oh, I didn’t notice.” “Yunho, give Ally some meat. Her plate’s empty.” Just then, Riya chimed in, tapping her empty plate with chopsticks. Seeing it as an opportunity, I subtly shifted my position towards Riya, smoothly extricating my leg from Jaehui’s toes. “Oh, sorry. Were you very hungry, Riya?” “No, not that. I mean that one, medium rare.” “Pork should be fully cooked, though.” “Geez, quit being old-fashioned. Cassie said the reason why pork was cooked all the way through is to kill a certain parasite, which isn’t an issue nowadays, so you can eat it slightly cooked. In Europe, many even eat pork rare.” “Still, no. What if our precious princess gets sick? Cooked through is safer.” “Seriously, so stubborn, Yunho. You’re such a stick in the mud.” After setting two well-cooked pieces of pork belly on Riya’s plate, I sneaked a glance at Seowon’s expression. The worst-case scenario would be if Seowon confronted Jaehui, but so far, she hadn’t reacted significantly. She didn’t seem entirely sure herself. She then picked up her phone and sent a message to someone. A few seconds later, the notification on my phone softly buzzed, revealing the recipient. Seowon lightly tapped my thigh with her finger and pointedly nodded towards my phone on the table. “Yunho, something came in on your phone.” Yeah, something you sent, huh? Resigned, I checked the message. From Seowon [Jaehui’s been poking your leg with her foot. Why are you just sitting there as if you two are secretly dating?] I promptly replied. From Me [Really? I didn’t notice.] Seowon [She kept poking you] Seowon [It’s annoying] Seowon [I don’t like Jaehui. Plan L sucks] Seowon [Why do they keep offering drinks to someone who doesn’t want any? Who do they think they are?] Seowon [Let’s finish up and head back to the dorm] From Me [We’ll leave once Yona arrives, haha] Seowon [Yona and Hong are all we need. Isn’t Jangwoo here too?] Seowon [Ally and Eunbit said they’re tired] What a load of nonsense. Enjoying the event more than anyone are Eunbit and Riya. Look at Eunbit going around, toasting with a shot glass at every table. Anyone would think she’s the star of the party today. Yet, having come to accept Seowon for who she is, even such little fibs seem endearing now. Seowon is just being Seowon. From Me [It would be weird if we just left by ourselves. Or do you want to have a breather with me for a bit?] Seowon [Yes!!!!! I want to have coffee too haha] Oh, you little... She’s easy enough to handle at core. I prepared to stand up, but the front table suddenly erupted in loud animosity. It was today’s main table with Dante, Hong, and other Girl Crush participants. In the hubbub with everyone's attention on Hong, their producer ‘Nigagara Hawa2,’ who had worked on songs for Girl Crush with Dante, suddenly shouted in excitement. “Dante has finally given up at the 12th challenge! Only Yeonhong remains, facing the 13th!” 12 challenges? 13th challenge? It turned out Dante and Hong had a mukbang competition going on. Dante seemed to have given up on his twelfth meat wrap, grimacing and holding back a burp. In contrast, Hong swallowed her food smoothly, taking a refreshing sip of cola with a satisfied expression. Hwa2 shook his head in disbelief. "Wow, she’s something else. Is it really okay for a girl group member to eat like this?" Then he turned to me with a question. "Yunho, Hong’s eaten more than two servings by herself. Is that alright?" Hong, realizing I was watching, now avoided my gaze entirely, not even embarrassed anymore. "Hong, you can eat as much as you want today. You lost a lot of weight preparing for Girl Crush." Hearing this, Hong finally broke into a big smile as she looked at me. "Hong, what’s your current eating streak?" "T-twelve wraps." "That’s not much. You can go for twenty, right?" "I can eat more." "Go on, challenge your limits today. Unit 4, unseal." "Yes, sir. I won't disappoint you." Everyone burst into laughter. It’s the usual banter among us, but others seemed to find it amusing. "Why do you call her Unit 4?" The question came from Latte, who had been knocked out in the quarter-finals of Girl Crush, and it was Dante who answered, knowing the origin. "Hong’s manager calls them by their order of joining the team. Yona’s Unit 3, Hong was the fourth to join, so she’s Unit 4." "Hong's company sounds so fun!" "Alright, let’s start with Hong’s record-setting streak. Even though he lost, Dante, the brave, will prepare the wraps himself." "Yo, man." Just as I was cheering Hong on with a raised fist, we heard loud laughter coming from the hall outside the room. Everyone’s gaze shifted towards the entrance. "Huh! Ha, Huh! Haha, Huh!" Oh no... What’s she doing now? By the counter, Eunbit was stepping from side to side, practicing capoeira, her latest obsession after taekkyeon and jiu-jitsu. "Wow, she looks legit! Seems like she’s really learned it." "Told you, she really did learn!" On YouTube. "Can you do kicks and stuff?" "Of course!" She already seemed drunk... I needed to step in before she embarrassed herself further. I quickly put on my shoes and headed to the hall. "You squat like this, then prop yourself up on one arm and... swoosh...!" "Oh no, careful!" Sure enough. I caught her as she lost her balance and was about to fall. "Heh, oppa?" "What’s that ‘heh’ for? I knew you’d end up like this." "Heeheehee!" She seemed embarrassed, burying her face in my chest and patting my shoulder as she laughed. I asked our youngest team stylist, Jin-kyung, who was sitting at the next table. "Jin-kyung, how much did she drink?" "Doesn’t seem like much... about two here, I think?" Doing a rough calculation, she probably had about a bottle and a half of soju and three beers. Like the venerable Kim Gyudon, she has this habit of washing down her soju with beer. With that amount, it’s no wonder the drunkenness had hit her by now. Other Upkick Girl members followed us out to scold Eunbit, all barefooted without their shoes on. "Oh dear, Ally can’t handle you, Bitbit unnie! Leaks inside, leaks outside! What a cheeky trick!" "Acting all willy-nilly just because Yona’s not here. You need to stop drinking." "Yeah, Eunbit. I think you’re drunk." "No way, Honghong unnie. I’m just getting started! I could drink all the alcohol here tonight! Right, Yunho oppa? I drink really well, don’t I?" "Sure, our Eunbit drinks well. The problem is you get drunk as soon as you start." "Today’s the day to drink, isn’t it? I mean, our Honghong unnie got runner-up in Girl Crush!" Eunbit shouted towards Dante, who had been watching from the room. "Stylish Dante, isn’t that right?! Isn’t today the day to party?" "Oh, right, right!" "Then why am I the only one drinking? Dante, propose a toast for us on behalf of our Hong Hong unnie!" "Okay. You heard her? Fill your glasses, everyone! Days like today, we ought to drink! Walking on two feet would be a holy mission." "The managers have to be able to walk on two feet, though." That was Plan Maker's Head, Lee Jeong-ho chiming in. Dante casually inquired. "Oh? Can’t we just drink? We can pay for the designated driver." "The actors need to approve that. I’ve gotten permission from Plan L." "Why need permission on a day like today? I’ll take responsibility, so just drink. What’s wrong? If not, let’s just end it here. If you’re drinking, let’s all drink together." With that atmosphere, it was impossible to refuse. All the managers, including myself who had been faking an alcohol buzz with soft drinks, raised our glasses filled with somaek (a soju-beer mix). Dante led the hip-hop toast. "To the crowned queen Hong and Dante’s swag-filled future! Everyone, let’s say Alrighty Dante, you say Yeonhong!" "Dante!" "Yeonhong!" "Dante!" "Yeonhong!" "Drink!" "Die!" "Orange juice!" "Fanta!" "Yeah!" "Yeah!" Together, we all mimicked Superman’s flying motion. I awkwardly followed suit with the gesture, then downed my glass. Perhaps influenced by Suhyun and Jaehui’s earlier words—be good to your manager—Riya and Seowon eagerly fed me meat appetizers one after another. After a second communal toast, the atmosphere became noticeably lively. Of all the company dinners I've attended, today was by far the best. As I was about to return to Plan L's table, Seowon tugged on my arm. "You promised me coffee." "Oh, right. Grab your jacket and put on your shoes." "Yunho, are you going to get coffee?" "Yeah. Want to join us?" "No, now Ally has to take care of Bitbit unnie. You know my order, right?" "Yeah. A hot latte with an extra shot and two pumps of hazelnut syrup." "Good job. You’re finally acting like a proper manager." "We're going to get coffee; anyone else need something? Hong’s treating." "Really?" After jotting down everyone's orders, a staff member mentioned that the café next door delivers, so Seowon and I stepped outside. As soon as we were out, Voltron Unit 2 clung to my left arm. "Brr, it’s cold." "How much did you drink?" "Counting what I just had, two beers and one somaek." "Not much then. You’re fine, right?" Barely finishing my sentence, she pretended to sway, pressing her hand to her forehead dramatically. "Ah, dizzy... Manager, we should rest a bit. I think I'm drunk." "So sober, overwhelmingly sober." "You idiot." "Don’t use that language with your manager." "Why didn’t you say anything when Jaehui was touching your leg?" "What? Did you just call me ‘you’?" "Yeah, you." "Wow, you’re really letting loose today, huh?" "I don’t care. I’m drunk. I won't remember this tomorrow." And suddenly, she leaned in for a kiss! "Whoa!" I wasn’t about to be caught off guard. I deftly disengaged my arm and sidestepped like a character from Tekken. "Darn..." She glared at me with a petulant expression. I avoided reacting seriously, knowing it would only make the atmosphere awkward. I opted for a playful tone. "You're slow. Train harder. You're still not a match for me, rookie." "Ugh! I’m gonna get wasted! I’m going to be a total mess today!" "Oh dear, Jangwoo’s going to have a hard time." "Hey! Why won’t you let me win even once?" I blocked Seowon’s playful charge with my back and she hooked her arms around my neck. I gave her a piggyback ride. That settled her down. Resting her chin on my shoulder, she muttered softly. "Manager smells good." "Smell like meat, don’t I?" "No, there’s a manager smell." "When we get to the coffee shop, you’ll have to get down." "Nope, not getting down. I’m sticking like gum to Kim Yunho." "Nope, you’re not slurring your speech yet." "Mmhm, mhm, Seowon’s drunk." Whether feigned or genuine, her usual fierce demeanor now seemed rather cute. Even though we were near a busy university area, her furry hood was pulled low, hiding Seowon’s face. Not that it mattered if she were seen. A manager giving a singer a piggyback ride at a company dinner was not scandalous. The close relationship between me and the Upkick Girl members was well-known among the fans. I’d even given Ally piggyback rides in front of them several times. No way something like this would spark any controversy. "We're here; get down." "Jeez, such a killjoy." "You're welcome." "What! Why didn’t you say it!" "Say what?" "When I say ‘killjoy,’ you’re supposed to say ‘I love you too!’ You always do!" "I did?" "Yes! Do it again." "Okay, okay. Say it again." She cleared her throat, preparing to repeat herself. "Jeez, such a killjoy." "Right back at you." "What the heck!" "Ha ha ha ha!" "Don’t joke around. Do it properly this time. Jeez, such a killjoy..." "Yeah, you’re more of a killjoy." "Argh!" "Hahaha!" After placing our coffee orders, I piggybacked Seowon back to the dinner. "Woohoo! Success at the 18th wrap! Shout it out, God Hong!" "Oppa, pass me a cola over here!" "Cola! Cola! Yeonhong is still going strong!" Unsealed, Hong had successfully continued her streak with a polar bear-like expression while guzzling cola, and Eunbit was demonstrating a lower-body joint lock on Riya. "Hahaha, it tickles, unnie! Ally is honestly too ticklish!" "It shouldn't tickle! It should feel like your heel is about to snap. Feel the pain, quickly! Hi-ya!" Is this the land of the legendary controllers? "Han Seowon, down. I need to stop Eunbit." "No, won’t get down. Gonna stick to Kim Yunho’s back like glue." "Moving on to the 19th wrap!" "Woohoo! God Hong, you’re straight out of a moral textbook!" "Riya, act like you’re in some pain!" "Ahaha! It tickles even more!" Yona, Jangwoo, please get here soon. I can’t manage this alone. Me [Jangwoo, when are you coming?] Jangwoo [Leaving now] Jangwoo [Why? Is the atmosphere bad?] Me [No, it’s too good. That’s the problem.] Attached Video. Hong wrapping ssam like Ha Jung-woo. Eunbit executing a lower-body lock on Riya. Seowon clinging to my back like Toshio from Juon. Jangwoo [Hahaha!] Jangwoo [But... umm... never mind. I’ll tell you when I get there haha] Yona and Jangwoo arrived 30 minutes later. I assumed their arrival would alleviate some of the workload. "Manager! My beloved manager! Yona is a bit tipsy today! I felt too good, so I drank a bit! So marry me! Puhaha!" < Is This the Land of the Legendary Controllers? > End