216 - Upki Girl

< Battle of the Bands > In the regular season of the Replay Girl competition, Upkey Girls took the championship, with Teenagers and May Queens securing second and third place respectively. The team that garnered the most attention and benefits this season was undoubtedly our Upkey Girls. And another team worth mentioning is May Queens. They made a sensational debut, grabbing the audience's attention with their impressive performances right from the first week. Although they ceded the second place to Teenagers in the final week's mission, Yujin and Tae-eun attracted attention as outstanding rookies, boasting both looks and talent. This heightened expectations for the full seven-member May Queens lineup. Both are expected to become the core and potent one-two punch of the team, brimming with star allure and abundant talent. Of course, everything will be judged once their album is released... "Manager, it’s starting!" "Alright, I’m on my way." We were watching the Replay Girl live broadcast at the dorm. This week featured the semifinals between GIG, which made it through the wildcard round, and the third place team May Queens. Before this, several teams that had appeared during the season filled the broadcast with special performances. The group ‘Ladybug’ was the first among the Replay Girl participants to make a comeback, showcasing their title track ‘POINT.’ “At first, I thought, ‘What kind of team name is that?’ But it sure sticks in memory,” commented Seowon, to which Hongi replied. “Same goes for ideas like ‘Body Armor Match’ or ‘Viscera.’ Once they're famous, they just become familiar.” “When you think about it, our team name is pretty unique too. It only sounds decent because we shorten it.” “I like our team name.” “Me too.” From this week onward, both Upkey Girls and Teenagers, who were no longer filming, appeared on video to update viewers with their recent activities. ―The girl group you raised! ―Hello, we are Upkey Girls! ―Wowwwww! Our VCR, recorded at the school uniform commercial shoot, appeared on screen, eliciting resounding cheers from the live audience. The reason for the reaction was evident: the Upkey Girls, who usually presented a distinctive image, were now showcasing an appealing, mainstream charm in their school uniforms. ―Hello, I’m Eunbit from Upkey Girls, the sexy bar! Yona unni, where are we filming right now? ―Yes, we, Upkey Girls, are shooting our first-ever school uniform commercial. ―Shall we have Honghong unni do a 2x speed version of ‘Hug Me’ dance now? ―Huh...? All of a sudden? ―Yes. All of a sudden. Ready, start! My dark day~ brightens with the light of you~ ―Whoosh whoosh whoosh whoosh! Despite being put on the spot for a random 2x speed dance, Hongi went along with it, while I listened to the broadcast with my ears and checked the real-time reactions flowing in on the Replay Girl online chat. ―Kradd: These Upkey Girls in uniforms are killing it. ―Hanlelanle: What were those animalistic roars when they appeared on screen? ―Jibureua: Their presence is palpable even in just a VCR. ―Watcheditall: Found it, Upkey Girls’ identity. Next album concept: go with this! ―Eunbitglow: Eunbit looks amazing in the school uniform, maybe because of her fair skin. ―Chiwo-baekrang: Are these uniform outfits for real? They nailed it. ―Comebackuser: Who’s the genius behind the Upkey Girls’ school uniform ad? Come out and accept my reverence. ―Usang1: But when Hongi dances, those shirt buttons seem to struggle a lot… cough… ―Pororiya: Seriously, I adore Jinri to death. ―Padakflavor: Should I buy the uniforms instead of the merch....? ㄴCheonYoo: Police officer, over here, please! “Oh my, the response to your uniforms is even better than I thought. Should we consider a school-themed look for the next song?” Eunbit, munching puffed rice cake and resting her head deep in my lap, inquired. “What are they saying? Any compliments for me?” “What are you doing? Aren’t you going to get up?” “What? Are you saying you don’t want me to use your lap as a pillow?” “Never mind…” What a pain. Ever since the infamous toilet incident, she’s been acting as if she’s some kind of legendary figure. She continued tapping her crossed leg rhythmically while giving orders to Yona. “I could really use a nice, cold glass of water. Perhaps the leader of Upkey Girls or Yonna unni could bring it...” “Oh. I’ll get it. How many ice cubes?” “Three, please.” Satisfied, the ‘legendary figure’ continued her act by feeding me a piece of her half-eaten rice cake. “Mr. Kim, kindly brief me on any comments related to me.” “Yes… They say the beige uniform complements your pale skin well.” “And?” “That’s about it.” “What? Only one?” “Oh, just now one popped up. ‘Sibak-Rabbit is as adorably cute as ever.’ it says.” “What kind of pronunciation is that? It’s Si-Bak-Rabbit... implying that Sibak has sensuality.” “Yes. Si-Bak-Rabbit.” “You, calling a legend Si-Bak-Rabbit, seriously? You’re doing this on purpose, right?” “What can I do if that’s all my pronunciation allows.” “Can you two fight somewhere else? I can’t concentrate with all the noise.” After Seowon’s remark, both of us fell silent. However, isn't your head too deep, Sibak? A lap pillow should at least rest near the knee, not on my groin. As I tried to subtly shift her head by lifting it slightly, she once again protested with her 'legend' title. Fine, I’m the sinner... ―Starting from the semifinals, each team will perform twice. The winner will be determined by combining 60% from the judges’ scores and 40% from real-time audience votes. ―Yes, and the first mission theme is ‘7080’. Let’s start with May Queens’ performance. Although it was expected that May Queens would advance smoothly, a major surprise unfolded. ―GIG is the overall winner of the playoffs! GIG's unexpected surge eventually devoured even the Queens of May. This is why people say momentum is a powerful force. The team, which had spent the season in the middle rankings with only Hyejin receiving any significant attention, suddenly caught a wave and grew at an astounding pace. It's clearly no longer luck but undeniable skill. "Wow, I can't believe it actually happened." "Yeah, GIG definitely did better today." "Yes, their arrangement and choreography were both great. But what about Yujin unni?" "What do you mean? They lost because they weren't good enough. Should I text her to tease her?" "She might come hunting for you..." "Let her. We have our pig bodyguard. Piggy, you can take on Yujin, right?" "Yeah. I'll protect everyone except you. But is GIG really going to advance?" "At their current pace, it's definitely possible. It's going to be a real showdown." "Yeah, as girls, we can't back down from a chest battle. We pride ourselves on that, don't we? Riya, do you want to go first?" "Aliya prefers to go last in a chest contest. Little Eunbit unni should go first." "Uh, if we're counting 'little,' Seowon unni should go first. She's 'little,' I'm just 'eh.'" "What are you talking about, Yu Eunbit? I can beat you." "Eek!" "Ugh. Why are we even debating when it's just a contest between Honghong unni and Aliya..." "Riya, it's a bit degrading to be grouped with the lesser ones." "Then Yo-Ri, you can be the middle rank. Does 2-strong, 1-middle, 2-weak sound right?" "Yeah, that's about right." "I can't believe you, IYona. You're technically on our side too. Where do you get off flaunting your chest pride?" "Still, I can't compare myself to you and Eunbit." "Wow, look at her getting cocky just because she puffed up a bit during her period. Listen, with the menstrual buff, I can get that big too." "Come on, we all know each other. I grew up drinking strawberry milk instead of plain milk, you know." "Hey, I've drunk plenty of strawberry milk too, okay?" "Wait, wait, time out. Instead of arguing, why don't we just measure and settle this? We can find out if Hong or Riya takes the top spot." "Right. Maybe Hong only looks big because of her broad shoulders, and Riya might actually win." "Hah! I never thought I'd see the day when Han Seowon doubts me with chest size. Is this a case of sour grapes from someone who can't have what they want?" "It's just that you've got a big build. You're built differently from Riya." "A big build is a skill. Try as you might, growing your build won't change an A to a B. It's just fleas jumping." Do women usually bicker about this kind of thing, or is it just these girls who are crazy? Thanks to Riya's pronunciation slip sparking this chest contest, there's no end in sight. I'm being treated like I'm invisible. Just listening to their conversation feels like my energy's being drained. I need to change the subject. I lifted Sibak’s head from where it was buried deeply in my lap and said, “But does it really matter who comes up against us? Considering GIG's current form, it's the Teenagers who should be worried, not us.” However, burning with chest pride, Sibak dove into her drawer to grab a measuring tape, determined to end her flat-chest rivalry with Seowon once and for all. "Sigh, I'm out of here." "Where are you going? You need to witness the evidence!" "You mean be a witness." "Whatever. Seowon unni might start protesting later, so you need to observe. It’s a request from the legend.” As a result... "Huh...? This can't be right..." "Don't get cocky, Yu Eunbit. You're the small one, and I'm the medium." "Let me measure again, just once more. Oh, right. I didn't drink my strawberry milk today." Even after grabbing a carton of strawberry milk from the fridge and doing some flapping exercises, the results didn’t change. If drinking strawberry milk really made you grow, wouldn’t everyone be big...? Sibak was visibly crestfallen. She looked down at her chest with disappointment. "I fed you strawberry milk, why didn't you grow...?" "Now, let me announce the 2018 first-quarter chest check results. First place, as expected, goes to Honghong unni!" "Han Seowon, bow down. How dare you doubt your superior?" "Yeah, your chest is thick." "Second place goes to me, Aliya. Eeeek!" "You never know what might happen if Riya gains a bit of weight." "Third place is Yona!" "Thank you. The middle class must thrive for our country to prosper." "After a fierce bust battle, the fourth place goes to the flat fox Seowon unni!" "Beating Yu Eunbit is enough for me." "And the honorable last of the first chest war is Yu! Eun! Bit! Would you like to say a few words?" “...It’s frustrating, but I’ll humbly accept my defeat. I’ll work harder to snatch the fourth place next time.” Even guys don't joke around like this. Sibak's bravado ended up mostly in vain. *** <Why Next Month’s Music Charts Deserve Attention: From 'UTB,' 'Liz Girls,' 'VNF,' to 'Somin Jung'> <Upkey Girls confirmed to join 'War of Stars' with new album on 9th. Will they continue their Replay Girl momentum?> <‘Love1’ comeback delayed due to internal issues. Agency says, “Not to avoid battles.”> <[★Issue] Who Will Smile in the Girl Group War? Analysis of 9 Groups Set to Comeback> *** ―Yes, I’ve just received the envelope with the results... The live broadcast of the playoffs between Teenagers and GIG, where our opponent would be decided, was being watched by me and the Upkey Girls in person. All the performances were over, and only the announcement was left. "Yona, who do you think will win?" "I'm 60-40 favoring Teenagers." "And Seowon?" "I'm going with GIG. What about you, Manager?" "Well... I think GIG might score higher with the judges, but Teenagers could pull off an upset with the viewer votes." Pre-broadcast predictions favored a Teenagers victory. The opinions among me and the Upkey Girls were evenly split, 3 to 3. ―Zen, who do you want to advance? ―I genuinely love both Teenagers and GIG. I think it’ll be a great competition, regardless of who makes it through. ―But Zen, you're an Upkey Girls fan at heart, aren't you? ―Come on, don’t say that. I support all the junior groups participating in Replay Girl. ―Alright, let’s reveal the results. Will it be the anticipated victory for Teenagers, as the viewers predicted, or can the late-blooming underdogs GIG rise once more? The team facing off against Upkey Girls in next week's ‘Replay Girl Series’ is... < End of Battle of the Bands >