138 - I Unknowingly Rejected My Favorite

EP.138 #138. Success [Dieeeeee! Die!] The ninja character swung his sword wildly in the air. It was supposed to be one of the most powerful ultimate skills in the game. [Aaah. Sleep...] My character, hit by a tranquilizer, fell asleep. The teammates, who had even given me buffs to become stronger, were sending me endless scolding messages. [What the hell is the damage dealer doing!!!!] [Seriously, the difference in damage dealing is pathetic.] [Ah... No heals...] [Sorry...] I was annoyed, but wrong was wrong. Like a deflated balloon, I sent an apologetic message to my teammates like a crouching shrimp. [Ughhh. Why is nothing working today?] When I pressed the cry emote, tears streamed from my character's eyes on-screen, and the chat filled with messages telling me not to cry. Ugh... So annoying... I just... Hate it all... [Should we cut today’s stream short? Maybe just...] Even Tae-min’s fans were getting on my nerves. The game wasn’t going well. I wanted to enjoy streaming, not gather people just to vent my frustrations. [Don’t go! Don’t go! Don’t go! Don’t go! Don’t go! Don’t go! Don’t go! Don’t go! Don’t go! Don’t go! Don’t go! Don’t go!] [It’s our fault...] [I can’t live without Lukaㅠㅠ] [I’ll report all of them for you!] Among those messages, one nickname caught my eye. [Lucario: Please don’t turn off the stream!!!] Excuse me, Mr. Tae-min. I see the whole chat, you know? Because of someone, I’m feeling really down. Feeling indignant, I declared a strike. [Sigh... Sorry, everyone. Luka’s having a tough day and can’t continue the stream today.] Anyway, I just needed to last about 10 more minutes to meet the minimum streaming time, and it was my free time after that. [I’ll make it longer on Wednesday instead. Ah. Bye everyone~] Jeers and crying emojis flooded in. Sometimes, it felt a bit pitiful, but now it seemed like a fixed routine, so it didn’t bother me much. If I gave in to all those demands, I’d probably end up streaming nonstop seven days a week. After clicking the stream end button, I sighed and got up from the chair, leaning against a small sofa. I deflated like a balloon losing air. The messages I saw earlier flickered in my mind. [Wow... People really like this?] [Tae-min is amazing.] [I came here after watching Tae-min’s video, is it normally like this?] Not everyone was trying to bite into me with their comments, but it’s true that one negative comment lingers more than a hundred positive ones. I tried to let it go, but a wave of emotion came over me. -Vrrr Vrrr My phone vibrated. It was my brother. [Hello?] [Are you at the studio?] [Yeah.] [Should I come pick you up?] Maybe he noticed I wasn’t feeling well. He asked me quite cautiously. [Yeah, please come over.] About ten minutes passed. There was a knock on the door. “Doa.” It was the voice of my beloved boyfriend. When I opened the door, he greeted me with a bright smile. “I brought some snacks.” He handed me a black bag. “...What’s this?” “It’s a convenience store roll cake.” He sat me down on the sofa and peeled the packaging off a disposable fork, handing it to me. “Let’s eat.” “Okay.” Sticking a fork into a piece of cake and putting it in my mouth, the sweet and creamy texture filled my senses. “You did well today.” Running his hand through my hair, my brother’s face seemed apologetic, but I shook my head. “No, it was a short stream today. Nothing to worry about.” “Still, those... unpleasant fans might’ve come because of me.” There was no need for him to apologize. He didn’t tell them to come here. “It’s fine. The stream is usually flooded with weird fans anyway.” I had gotten used to it, so it didn’t bother me much, but for non-subculture fans, my stream might have seemed bewildering. “They’re like that because they like you.” Even after everything, Tae-min held a strong sense of camaraderie with the fan club, defending them earnestly. With his handsome face, he earnestly insisted the fans weren’t bad people. “Got it.” Only after I slipped another piece of cake into his mouth did my brother stop explaining. “Sigh... But honestly, girls confessing their love to you is a bit much.” Saying they love Tae-min, or they’re going to marry him. Though it's normal in idol and actor comment sections, knowing the target was my boyfriend made it hard to accept. “Don’t you find it strange when people act clingy towards me?” If you think about it, they often make inappropriate comments towards me too. “Lukatang is everyone's idol.” ...Don’t make that face. With a stern and serious face, he held my hand. “And they say those things because they’re cheering you on.” True. His mindset was different from the start. The way he accepted things was different. To him, I was always Vtuber Luka from the beginning. It made sense he didn’t feel any discomfort because of that. But I... “Hold on a second.” “Huh? Why?” “Could you bend over for a moment?” “Like this?” As he bent over, I licked the cream stuck on the corner of his mouth. “...You left this for me, right?” “Nope.” My boyfriend laughed, finding my action ridiculous. His hand was warm as he patted my head, and I nudged my crown against him, signaling for more. It felt nice knowing that my Tae-min was just mine. Yet, in my inability to voice that weak sincerity, I found myself somewhat... annoyed with myself. --- “Tae-min! Really! The response is fantastic right now.” Inside the YM building. Before attending my acting class, my manager pulled me into the seminar room, saying she had something to discuss. “Ah... you're talking about that interview video, right?” “Did you see its view count?” “Yes.” “It’s almost at a million views in just a week. There are tons of comments too.” I tried to follow everything about myself, but there was so much that it was impossible to keep up. “Capturing that candid vibe during the interview was a brilliant move, don’t you think?” Going public about my passion for VTubers. I hoped it might benefit Doa somehow, but seeing people harass her after tuning in left a bittersweet taste. I actually felt a bit guilty. “Like I mentioned before, we’ve been getting a flood of offers for shows and appearances.” “Yes.” “Honestly, some of these offers are extraordinarily favorable for a rookie.” Extraordinary offers...? I blinked, asking what that meant, and my manager handed me a document on her phone. “It’s a drama set to air later this year. Here’s the production company, and these are their recent works...” Listening to the explanations, I swallowed nervously. “So they want me to join this project?” I wasn’t familiar with the director’s name, but I was startled by the titles she mentioned. They were hit shows I was aware of. There were countless 10-minute drama summary videos circulating online, and I remembered occasionally watching some clips. “I was genuinely surprised to get this offer. But it seems the director is interested in working with newcomers, and you were on his list.” I checked the lineup again. Unlike before, there were names of actors I recognized in the lead roles. Real celebrities from TV. And I'd be working directly with them. “I strongly recommend you take this opportunity. It’s not often that we can secure a spot for our talents in such prominent productions.” I understood it was a prestigious project, but I still doubted if I was ready for it. Regardless of my newcomer status, could someone with just a month’s worth of acting classes handle this? Having my confidence already shaken by the ongoing practice, my hesitation only intensified. “Um... Can I think about it a bit more and decide after reviewing the script?” “Taemin, opportunities like this don’t come every day. Truly.” My manager seemed frustrated by my reluctance, searching for the right words to convince me. “Don't you want to succeed?” The word ‘success’ made me bite my lip. From her perspective, I must’ve seemed puzzling. Rejecting such a push while being in an entertainment agency. But for me, this job... For me, success means... I closed my eyes and let out a short sigh. “When do you need my decision by?” It was a moment that required serious contemplation.