Chapter 14 The Beggar Sect (4) - Martial Arts Masochist

**Emeis Beggars (4)** Cheongwol stood in the dimly lit basement, holding a candle. It had been a long time since she had returned to this basement after that day's events—a room that had lingered in her thoughts for so long, whether she was swinging her sword, falling asleep, or even in her dreams. Standing there again, the vividness felt different. If anything had changed, it was the presence of leather drying racks and hides that had been moved around to avoid rain. Cheongwol's heart was pounding fiercely. Even the equipment hanging on the walls appeared differently to her now. She once thought they were all instruments of torture, but imagining them as tools for, uh, certain games, they revealed a new purpose. She wondered for what occasion those whips were used. And what about those blindfolds? Like when one's mouth is gagged, would those be used to blindfold someone? She saw a wooden mannequin bound with ropes... Would Han Seojin someday take away her freedom like that too? Would he then whisper in her ear to leave everything to him? The collars, the bizarre leather garments with unknown uses—all of it made her heart race. And more than anything, a tingling sensation was already coursing through her body. In the Emei Sect, she had never felt such a stimulus, but just entering this basement was enough to feel it. Soon, she would do something bad. She might engage in a disgraceful act. The process would inevitably involve shame and humiliation... and Cheongwol had willingly asked for all of this. "...Ugh." Cheongwol found it hard to accept that she had come here because she wanted this. No. She didn't desire that disgraceful act. She was a disciple of the Emei Sect, and the teachings of the sect were ingrained deeply in her bones. She wanted to be as pure, chaste, and dignified as the revered heads of the sect. But could she be called pure if she sought out this place? Cheongwol shook her head slightly again. This was for a purpose—to challenge her inner demons. She hadn’t come here to feel shame. Yet her heart was pounding, as if expecting something. -Thump... Thump... Thump... At that moment, Han Seojin started descending the wooden steps. Cheongwol's fingertips began to tremble slightly. It wasn't fear—it wasn't a life-or-death situation. But shame was inevitable, so she decided to think of this as mere tension. **** The level should be just right—not too high, not too low. Maybe it's better for pornography to stay beyond the screen. Now that I'm in a position to lead an SM play, the things to consider are driving me crazy. Why is my life so hard? After struggling to survive with the beggar elders, I learned skills, worked hard, and was just managing to get by! Now, my only hobby is caught up with a lunatic, and I'm forced to gamble with my life based on it? Couldn't a nice masochist just show up with a collar in their mouth, saying, 'Master~'? Why does my partner have to be Cheongwol? It's terrifying. Even though it's an SM play with Cheongwol, sexual arousal is at rock bottom while survival instincts are through the roof. It feels like I'm playing Russian roulette. The more maddening part is that Cheongwol is simply stunning. Breathtakingly beautiful. If I loosen up even a bit, I'm sure I'd fail at maintaining the appropriate level because I'd be captivated by her looks. And that moment would be the last scene I remember. Considering she's like someone only seen in dreams makes it all the more so. Her body is, dare I say, optimized for this kind of play. I caught a glimpse when water was thrown on her. Perfectly sized breasts. Broad hips, a thin waist. Flawlessly smooth skin. Long legs compared to her overall frame. Thighs like honey. Slim ankles. Well-rounded buttocks. Straight abs. A navel. A small head and a face that stops your breath. Even her silky hair. She's beautiful, and yet she's worked out diligently. Someone might even want to wield such a masochist, even if it costs their life... But when death truly approaches as reality, such words don't come out. It's just instinct. People want to live. If I didn't know what Cheongwol was, maybe even my son would have been frustrated. But knowing, my son is quietly mindful. Thank goodness, truly. If Cheongwol saw my son stretching, they'd have been separated for life. I closed the basement door and slowly descended the stairs. At the bottom was Cheongwol, with her candle beside her. Since I was also carrying a candle, the basement was brighter than expected. Cheongwol was observing my every move. Meanwhile, I was assessing the room's ambiance. Even though she might not know, the play had already begun. The tightrope walk for my life was already underway. In that regard, the basement was too bright. The mood wasn't right. I put my candle down near the stairs and approached Cheongwol. "..." "..." What a defiant look. Are you sure this is what you want? -Chiik. I extinguished Cheongwol's candle. The basement grew much darker, feeling more intimate. Cheongwol seemed to sense the change in atmosphere, briefly glancing around with anxiety. Nonetheless, she asked, "Why... why did you put it out?" "..." The first rule to set a strong atmosphere: a sadist shouldn't talk too much. While I needed to say what was necessary to heighten the mood, if I babbled on like Speedwagon, it would ruin everything. 'Ah, this doesn't seem intimate enough for a play. The light is too bright, breaking the mood, making it hard to focus on my commands, and it'll be distracting...' From a masochist’s perspective, the moment they think, 'What's that guy saying?' it's over. So, words must be kept to a minimum. "It's... it's dark. Why did you put out the candle?" "..." I ignored her words and glanced at the equipment hanging on the wall. Cheongwol followed my gaze to the wall. Now, what should I do to ensure our dear masochist doesn't strangle me? "..." "..." Hmm. This won't work. Those all look intense. Just as relationships advance from hand-holding, to kissing, to more intimate actions, SM play also needs a gradual escalation in intensity. **Collar play? Intense bondage? Whipping? Spanking? Watersports? Public exposure? Those are acts that cannot even be dreamed of without deep trust. Such acts inherently require immense trust in one another. The sadist must be able to take responsibility for the masochist, and the masochist must be able to trust the sadist with their body. Engaging in debauchery implies inherent risk, and trust is the sole condition that makes such risks feasible. So contrary to popular belief, couples deeply engaged in SM play are said to have profoundly deep trust for one another. They are not individuals who partake in casual encounters. Do not mistake sadists and masochists as people simply driven by erotic desires. A sadist does not favor just any masochist, nor does a masochist favor any sadist. These acts are exclusive to one another. Why else would some masochists tattoo their master's initials onto their bodies? If their master were easily replaceable, such acts would not occur. SM couples have a relationship that, despite their twisted proclivities, entangle them as strongly as they twist themselves together, even if it means going so far as to say they are twisted by their own right. Therefore, when that trust is shattered... When they part ways, it is said that their pain is greater than that of ordinary couples. Some reportedly cannot overcome it, although it naturally varies by case. So, where do Cheongwol and I stand in this framework? Trust? That's nonexistent. Not only is it nonexistent, but we aren't even close. Not even friends. Just strangers. ...How could we possibly engage in such intense play? Even if Cheongwol did engage in such play, it might not entice me greatly either. Thus, I don't particularly feel like trying it. What arouses me is witnessing someone I love endure shame and pain for me. Cheongwol was not that person for me. If I find myself stirred, it would be solely because Cheongwol is beautiful. That’s the end of it. ...Though, of course, my excitement is immediately useless in the current situation. "..." The more I think about it, the more I question why I'm doing this with Cheongwol. ...But Cheongwol doesn't seem to care either way, seemingly disregarding the notion that SM play typically occurs between close partners or even perhaps deliberately choosing to incomprehend it. ...But what can I do? I must obey when ordered. "...Cheongwol, look here." Cheongwol flinched and turned her gaze to me. Her tension was apparent to me as well. Good. Let’s start. ...No, let’s survive this. “...Cheongwol, look here.” Han Seojin's change was never something one could truly grow accustomed to. Cheongwol unconsciously shivered as she glanced at Han Seojin again. ‘Cheongwol.’ The call seemed to echo deeply within her. Was it truly the same man as before? The being who once consoled and dominated her had reappeared before her, the way a mask reveals a true face when lifted. How does he live concealing this side? The air in the basement was cool. Every breath she took seemed to allow the coolness to penetrate her lungs, making her body tremble all the more easily. Despite it being daytime, not a single ray of light entered the basement... which meant that, aside from the burning candle, nothing else illuminated her view. Moreover, it was even darker now because Han Seojin had extinguished the candle by Cheongwol. Backlit by light, Han Seojin's face was obscured. On the contrary, Cheongwol's face was fully illuminated for Han Seojin by the candlelight, her emotions exposed. She wondered if he could see through every conflicting emotion she felt right then. “Before we start, let me just tell you one thing.” Han Seojin's voice pierced through the darkness with an understated resonance. “...W-what is it?” “You don’t have to force yourself to follow any command. If it’s too difficult to bear, just give up and leave.” He spoke with a composed air. “...” “...You’re doing this not because I want you to, but because you want to, right?” Cheongwol wanted to refute his words. “I... I'm doing this for inner peace-” “-Whether it’s for inner peace or not, you're doing it because you desire to, right?” “...” Left speechless, Cheongwol lowered her gaze. -Swish. When she did, Han Seojin gently lifted her chin. Momentarily chilled, Cheongwol harshly swatted away his hand. -Thud! Yet Han Seojin remained composed. “...Isn’t that right?” “...” After a moment’s hesitation, Cheongwol nodded with her lips tightly sealed. The admission left a bitter taste in her. But she had no choice. Had she not nodded, Han Seojin would undoubtedly pave a way for her to leave. “Right. Since this is something you want... speak up for yourself.” “...Huh...? Say what...?” Cheongwol's voice emerged softly, thinly, cautiously. The tension was a tightening noose around her throat as the anticipation lingered with no known destination. Silence hung in the air. In the darkness, Han Seojin leaned slightly forward. Though his face was still obscured by the shadow, his mouth alone was visible. With a smile, he whispered to Cheongwol. “...Say ‘I am a shameful and dirty woman’ three times.”