119 - Douluo: Martial Spirit Blue Silver Grass

Reincarnated as the Malicious Senior Sister - Chapter 119 Jiu Ying felt her heart tremble, her eyes filled with sorrow and pain. The young girl in her arms, Fu Ling, had already lost consciousness, yet she continued to weakly murmur. Each word she spoke felt like a dagger carving deep into Jiu Ying's heart. "Ling Ling knows she was wrong—" "Ling Ling will never lie again—" "Please, Senior Sister, forgive Ling Ling just this once—" Fu Ling's tears and pleas became shackles, binding Jiu Ying's heart—which ought to have been cold and indifferent—firmly within them. The whispers at her ears were filled with sobs, echoing incessantly in her mind, like relentless thunder. She never knew the depth of Fu Ling's affection for her had reached such an extent! Silence was a tacit rejection on her part. But seeing Fu Ling tormented by the love parasite, her heart softened once more. She could never bear seeing Fu Ling suffer, especially when it was because of her. A breeze blew through, nudging the window open with a slight gap. The silvery moonlight streamed through the crack, casting a faint glow inside. Jiu Ying lifted her head, her eyes now entirely red. She cradled Fu Ling, gently placing her on the desk near the window. Under the moonlight, she could clearly see the tear-streaked, delicate face. Fu Ling continued to tremble, her chest rising and falling with every breath, each one laden with boundless pain. Her soft pink lips were chapped and bleeding, blood trailing down her mouth and soaking her chin within moments. The air was thick with the metallic scent of blood. Jiu Ying's eyes filled with even greater pain, her gaze fixed on Fu Ling's bloodied lips. When she saw her companion about to torment her already scarred lower lip further, she couldn't help but gently lift her up. Her own hands were similarly bitten and bloody, but compared to Fu Ling’s suffering, such wounds were insignificant. She extended her injured hand, her fingertips still faintly oozing with blood, yet she felt no pain. Her fingers paused briefly, then rested on the girl's chin, applying a slight pressure to prevent her from further self-harm. The dragon's saliva was sweet and fragrant, best for healing wounds. Jiu Ying exhaled softly as the window opened fully. The pale moonlight illuminated her cold yet strikingly beautiful face. She pressed Fu Ling's hand onto the desk, completely embracing her. The blood continued to flow from those lips, the wounds so deep that the tender flesh beneath was visible. Just the sight made her heart ache unbearably. Fu Ling hadn’t done anything wrong; she was the most innocent of them all! Why did she have to endure such undeserved pain? Jiu Ying's eyes glistened with unshed tears. She placed her thumb on those soft lips, now sticky with congealed blood—both hers and Fu Ling's. She bit her lip, unable to stand by as Fu Ling suffered. Finally, she held that small, fair chin and pressed her own lips against Fu Ling's. Her mouth was filled with the metallic taste of blood, her lips against the wounded ones of the girl. As four soft lips met, she gently allowed her tongue to touch Fu Ling's cracked lips, tenderly licking them. The movement, infinitely gentle, was initially unnoticed by the unaware Fu Ling. It wasn't until the taste began to recede that Fu Ling unconsciously opened her lips, unable to resist the temptation, yearning for the sweetness and softness as she lifted her head to chase it. What began as a simple act of healing subtly changed in nature. Fu Ling wanted more. Jiu Ying, overwhelmed with shock and confusion, was panicking. In her past life and this one, she had never shared such an intimate moment with anyone. The intermingling of their breaths and the unique sweetness of the girl spread through her mouth. Instinctively, she pushed Fu Ling away, astonishment lacing her features as she pressed her fingers to her own lower lip. She couldn't believe what Fu Ling had just done. As if repeating the scene from three years past, Fu Ling once again claimed a kiss from her in a moment of madness. A kiss even more ambiguous than before. The wounds on Fu Ling's lips, however, had healed the moment their lips touched. For Jiu Ying, that kiss was overwhelmingly shocking. Yet for Fu Ling, it was the most wonderful thing in the world. Her eyes remained shut, still unconscious, but her body stopped trembling, and her breathing steadied. The love parasite within her seemed to calm with the kiss, settling in peace. Jiu Ying's brow furrowed deeply, her heart racing even faster. As time passed, the more composed she appeared on the surface, the more turmoil raged inside. Recalling that intimate kiss, she surprisingly found that she wasn't repulsed by it. At least, not in the way she had anticipated. She was reluctant to admit it, but she couldn't deny it either— The kiss had brought her more shock than disgust. Or rather, there was no disgust to begin with. She had always thought there was no romantic feeling towards Fu Ling, but that kiss challenged her long-held beliefs and choices. It forced her to consider another possibility— If she had to spend her lifetime with someone, why couldn't it be Fu Ling? Even if she couldn't reciprocate Fu Ling's love now, perhaps someday she would accept it. Who could say for sure? The more she thought, the more panicked she became. Even someone like Jiu Ying found herself astonished at her own thoughts. Led astray by illusions of the love parasite in her previous life, she had spent her life in repentance for the false affections of her youth. In this life, faced with Fu Ling, her defenses kept crumbling. Even in matters of love, she repeatedly softened her resolve, from fervent resistance to contemplating a shared future. Unable to accept this love was because of Fu Ling; the willingness to try was also because of Fu Ling. As always, she had no principles when it came to Fu Ling. But if Fu Ling knew the truth, if she understood their true connection, would she still feel the same? Jiu Ying couldn't be sure. She frowned tightly, a faint blush spreading across her pale cheeks. It wasn't until she glanced back at the girl on the desk that she reluctantly withdrew her finger from her own lip. With the love parasite soothed, the pain gradually faded away. Fu Ling lay unconscious, looking both obedient and pitiable. The night breeze slipped in through the window, lifting the stray hairs on her forehead to reveal a stretch of fair, smooth skin. So fragile, so beautiful. Gazing even from afar, it evoked a sense of compassion. Jiu Ying's heart skipped a beat, her fingertips trembling within her sleeves. As she stared at those healed lips, her throat moved involuntarily. It was a face she knew well, but following that moist kiss, it felt strangely unfamiliar. Facing this face countless times in her former life, she now seemed unable to recall that feeling. As though the Fu Ling of this moment and the self from her past life had transformed into wholly different beings. Accepting this was no easy task. In haste, Jiu Ying pulled her gaze away, her mind a jumbled mess of confusion. Even when she carried Fu Ling to the bed, her thoughts remained chaotic. Before tonight, she saw Fu Ling as a family member; after tonight, what role could she assume at Fu Ling's side? She didn't know. The sky grew darker still, but the moonlight grew ever brighter. Jiu Ying sat quietly at the bedside, her expression unreadable. Her hand, wounded, began to throb with pain. She lifted it, fingers, palms, and back all marked with deep teeth imprints. The wounds no longer bled, but the redness in her palm appeared as menacing as ever. She retrieved a handkerchief from her sleeve, yet she didn't attend to her own injuries. Instead, she meticulously wiped the blood from Fu Ling's mouth and chin. Her actions and gaze brimmed with unwavering gentleness. It was as if she were caring for the most precious treasure. More accurately—Fu Ling was her treasure. Whether love existed or not, Fu Ling was always the person she cared for most. No one could replace Fu Ling's place in her heart. Simply looking at that pale, lifeless face, Jiu Ying's heart softened to its core. She admitted it; she regretted it. She shouldn't have hurt Fu Ling in such a way, shouldn't have responded to Fu Ling's love with silence. Even rejecting it, she owed Fu Ling a proper, convincing reason for why she couldn't accept this love. Not like she had just done, keeping silent and letting Fu Ling be tortured by baseless doubts and the love parasite. Her gaze fell, an air of sorrow upon her features— Perhaps, once Fu Ling discovered their actual connection, her affections would cease. Unable to make the decision herself, she considered giving Fu Ling the right to choose. She bit her lip, resolved at last. At that moment, she broke the skin of her own fingertip and pressed a drop of blood to the center of the girl's forehead. Flesh met flesh, blood served as a medium. In an instant, the painful memories buried deep within her, all transferred to Fu Ling's mind through her fingertip— Including how she fell for Si Qi, lost her reason because of him, and step by step brought about the ruin of the Qingzhu Sect. If possible, she wished she could bury these shameful recollections, never allowing Fu Ling to know. Because these were her sins alone, bearing no relation to the current Fu Ling. Her guilt should be hers alone to bear, keeping Fu Ling from being dragged into this abyss of sin to share in the anguish. Yet now, she had no choice but to reveal it. From first meeting Si Qi to the moment she ended both their lives, three whole years had passed. So long, yet so short. Jiu Ying had never felt fear like this before. Revealing the truth to Fu Ling meant exposing all her past mistakes. She had once loathed herself, and now she feared that Fu Ling, upon knowing the past, might come to hate her as well. She dared not think further. For her, it felt like awaiting an unknown judgment. She didn't know what the outcome would be. Perhaps disdain, perhaps hatred. Even as Fu Ling opened her eyes, Jiu Ying's heart pounded anxiously. The room was silent, the atmosphere intensely solemn. Their eyes met, neither spoke. Fu Ling had dreamt a terrifying dream. Her gaze was vacant, as though not fully conscious. She looked at Jiu Ying, and after a long pause, weakly called out, "Senior Sister—" Her soft voice still carried remnants of a sob. Remembering the scenes from her dream, fear gripped her heart, and she momentarily forgot her prior heartbreak. She sat up abruptly and rushed into Jiu Ying's embrace. The sudden embrace caught her off guard. Jiu Ying didn't know how to react, but Fu Ling's next words struck her still— "Senior Sister, I'm so scared. I dreamt I had killed everyone." A dream? Jiu Ying smiled bitterly, pain stabbing through her heart. How could she tell Fu Ling it wasn't a dream but mistakes she truly committed in the past? Tears welled up in Jiu Ying's eyes. Before she could speak, a single tear silently slipped away into the night. Even she didn’t know why that tear fell. Guilt, and regret. She tried to speak, but no words came out. Only when the girl in her arms repeated the terror of her dream did Jiu Ying, with a trembling voice, reveal all her secrets. "Fu Ling, it wasn't a dream; it was all real." Real? How could that be? Fu Ling shook her head, unwilling to believe. But Jiu Ying's next words changed everything; Fu Ling's face went pale, her breath nearly halting— "The Fu Ling who caused all that destruction wasn’t you, it was me." "Everything, I truly experienced it." "Otherwise, why do you think I wanted to kill you when we first met, or how I know you so well?" "Fu Ling, you and I are one and the same, you shouldn’t love me." ※※※※※※※※※※※※※※※※※※※※ This might get locked, please bear with it. Senior Sister is afraid Fu Ling will dislike her. Thank you to the little angels who cast in their votes or donated nutritional fluids to support me between 2020-11-30 00:03:31 and 2020-11-30 23:59:11~ Thank you to the little angels for donating landmines: Yi Shi Qing Qing Xiao Wo Kuang, Lu Guo, Tian Lao Shi De Hui, and Jin Ji Xiao Si Er with one each; Thank you to the little angels for donating nutritional fluids: Yue Ya Zhi Zhi with 40 bottles; A Tong Bu Xiang Xie Zuo Ye, Chen Yi Han Ne, Xia Chong Yin Bing, T_WH with 20 bottles each; Shuang Xue, Liu Si, Xian Yu, Han Xu, Na Ge Xi Gua Xiang Gan Ma, Ke Ai De Ta, Ao Hu, Xiang Fei De Xiao Xiong Mao with 10 bottles each; Ji Yun Jian with 2 bottles; Thank you all so much for your support, and I will continue to work hard!