第84話 相坂礼奈〜過去④感情論〜 - I Was Cheated on by My Girlfriend but My Devilish Junior Now Yearns for Me

Akihiko Toyoda. He served as an advisor of sorts for the beauty contest organization. Even after I withdrew from entering the contest, I continued working on the organizing committee, which is why I had occasional chances to see him. "I'm a fan of yours, Reina-san." With his bowl cut and round glasses, he projected a slightly frail aura despite wearing a crisp blue shirt. One day, he declared this to me in a firm tone. My brief stint in the contest lasted only a few days, yet it seemed enough for him to consider himself a fan. From the start, I sensed his overt affection. Naturally, I was cautious initially. Any girl with a boyfriend would react that way. However, as time passed, I began to think that extreme caution wasn't necessary with him. He once confided that knowing I had a boyfriend, he was content just talking to me. It might not have been his true feelings, but frequent conversations revealed that he wasn't the type to pursue someone else's partner. Toyoda himself claimed, "Even this was my idea of a university debut," suggesting he was inherently a reticent person. While it's perhaps inappropriate to judge based on appearances, he didn't strike me as someone bold enough to make advances on women. "When you're with me, Reina-san, it's called a date in the real world." So, I was genuinely taken aback when he unexpectedly clasped my hand, revealing a daring side I hadn't anticipated. Remaining composed, I politely said, "Please stop?" I didn't dislike him. In fact, I felt he could be a good friend. I wanted to maintain our relationship without damaging it. So, I gently voiced my objection. He looked crestfallen and relaxed his grip. "I would never cheat on you like your boyfriend. I wouldn’t walk with other girls." Every time he mentioned infidelity, a pang hit my chest. Although I felt a touch of jealousy towards Ayaka, I had come to accept and even understand Yuta and Ayaka's relationship. Perhaps in the eyes of others, I had been continuously deceived. Had I been in a pathetic state all this time? Toyoda’s words left me with a haunting sensation of doubt, as though my past year was being negated. Hadn't Yuta ever felt guilty being with Ayaka while he was with me? Perhaps he felt nothing, and that’s why they remained together for so long. I began to wonder how I would react if I grew close to someone other than my partner. If I felt nothing, then maybe I had no right to criticize Yuta. With that in mind, I decided to experiment with Toyoda. Toyoda grabbed my hand again, and I went with it to see if it sparked any guilt. If I could equate myself with Yuta, perhaps I could smile again as usual. For the first time of my own volition, I held Toyoda's hand for a few seconds. And then, I snapped back to reality. When I awoke from my long reverie, I found myself on the path leading to Yuta’s house. Encountering Toyoda and holding hands was entirely unexpected, and I continued my walk to the destination without hesitation. With our first anniversary date tomorrow, I wanted to resolve any issues with Yuta to enjoy the special day. But, should someone see us like this... Toyoda furrowed his brow as I abruptly turned back and asked, "Where are you going?" Our hands remained interlocked. "Hey, Toyoda-kun, let go." "No. I—" "I said stop!" I shook off his hand. "Even if Yuta-kun is going on a date with Ayaka-san, that doesn't justify holding your hand." Toyoda seemed surprisingly tenacious in response to my assertion. "This isn't cheating. You didn’t have any such intention, right?" "That is..." "It's the same as your boyfriend's situation. Without intention, it's not cheating." While Toyoda didn’t explicitly state it, an outsider like him criticizing Yuta made me uncomfortable. Even if Yuta might be at fault according to society, the judgment should come from me, his girlfriend. "Hey, Toyoda-kun." "Yes?" "You often make sound arguments, befitting an advisory role." "Is that so?" "But..." I mulled over my words, as if to peel off his affection for me. "In relationships, I believe emotional responses trump logical arguments. The moment I vaguely disliked you was the moment it all ended. So, please give up." Toyoda widened his eyes at my words. His palm was moist, and it was clear that it wasn’t from my sweat. He must have gathered immense courage, and I felt pity that my rejection was the only response. However, my concern over being seen trumped any guilt towards him. Swallowing the apology bubbling in my throat, I steadfastly met his gaze, hoping he'd understand the strength of my resolve. Finally, with a dry, weary laugh, he conceded. "…I'm surprised to be told so directly." Toyoda dashed past me, heading to the station. Watching his retreating figure, waves of self-loathing surged within me. What was I doing near Yuta's house? Turning around, no one was behind me. But being on this straight road visible for a hundred meters meant that someone might have seen us if luck wasn’t on my side. I tried not to dwell on the worst possibility.