第86話 月光 - I Was Cheated on by My Girlfriend but My Devilish Junior Now Yearns for Me
Reina finished speaking, exhaling deeply. The tea in the plastic bottle rippled slightly. It was as if she had unearthed something buried deep within her. "...You hated that I was with Ayaka, didn't you?" He bit his lip at his own words. —That's not it. What Reina disliked was his careless remarks. Knowing that, he unconsciously tried to shift some of the responsibility onto Ayaka. He shook his head and corrected himself. "I'm sorry. It was wrong of me to talk to you about Ayaka in the first place." Until he heard Reina’s perspective, he hadn't realized how lacking in consideration his actions and words had been. If a friend had told him a similar story, he'd have gotten angry saying, "What’s with that guy?" When they were dating, Reina never talked about her male friends. Even though she was in a women's college now, she attended co-ed schools before and must have hung out with people. Judging from Reina’s social media after they broke up, it was apparent. In essence, Reina was considerate of his feelings. But he never questioned why Reina didn’t mention male friends, while he told her everything about his day, often mentioning Ayaka. Although Reina tolerated this, it was only because she was extraordinarily considerate. He wanted to share every aspect of his day with his partner, wanted her to relive his experiences with him. Each self-centered remark was slowly straining her. Back then, he was euphoric. The satisfaction of having Reina as a girlfriend and the comfort of having Ayaka by his side. As Reina said, it wasn't realistic for him to cut ties with Ayaka after starting to date Reina. But if he hadn't been so detailed in his recounting, things wouldn’t have become so convoluted. Despite that, he put the blame aside— "I wasn't angry when you talked about other girls, Yuta. Because seeing you enjoy yourself made me happy." Reina squeezed the plastic bottle, a dry sound creaking from it. "But... my acceptance was based on being the most important person to you. With Ayaka, I started to wonder if she wasn't closer to you than I was. Once I thought that, it just hurt." He wondered what expression Reina had when she listened to him. He couldn't recall the details anymore. But likely, it was similar to now— "Ayaka has so many qualities better than mine. She's beautiful, smart, and beloved by everyone, right? Compared to that, I'm shy, go to an average college, and don't have much influence." With each word, Reina seemed to grow more distressed. "While listening to you, I realized the only thing I had over Ayaka was the time with you. But even that... what was it worth?" She was wounding herself. This was what Reina had kept locked away until now. The reality she had been made to feel when they were together. He wasn’t her boyfriend anymore. But he couldn’t ignore the reality that Reina was suffering because of what he had led her to feel during their relationship. Just as he was about to respond, Reina suddenly smiled. "Haa... I feel much better now." "What?" Her relieved smile caught him off guard, prompting her to speak first. Her voice had returned to its familiar gentle tone, reassuring. "I'm just really happy I could talk to you about all this." Reina said, drawing a soft curve to her lips. "At the party, when you got on that elevator, I thought, 'Once that door closes, we might never see each other again.' So being here with you now makes me truly happy." Back then, as soon as the term "miss con" came up, he had overreacted. Now, he couldn’t help wishing he could go back. Perhaps Reina had remembered that time too. "You said there might be exceptions if there were special circumstances, Yuta. But when I thought it over at home, I realized my situation wasn't special. These kinds of stories are everywhere, aren't they?" A boyfriend's laxity, and a close relationship with a female friend. Even infidelity wasn’t rare once in college compared to high school. "So, I decided to stop contacting you. I thought we might never meet again..." Reina fell silent, and he felt he understood the words she didn’t say aloud. Just before the elevator doors closed, she was indeed in tears. "...That ends my story about the past. Like you said, Yuta. So next, I want to talk about my future." With that, Reina placed the bottle beside him. Rising from the bench, she faced him. "Hey, Yuta. Do you hate me?" His eyes widened involuntarily. Whether he liked or disliked her. After all they had discussed, it was impossible for him to say he disliked her. "It’s not my place to say, one way or the other." "No, choose." For the first time today, Reina used a firm tone, cupping his cheeks with her hands. "Yuta, you're kind, so you’re probably blaming yourself a lot now." "I'm not kind. I need to apologize to you first—" "Don’t apologize!" Reina shouted, stopping him. She moved her hands to his shoulders. "If you apologize, I won’t forgive you." "W-what do you mean—" "You might be somewhat insensitive, Yuta, but you’re a genuinely good person. That's why you want to apologize. You see the breakup as your failure and feel the need to make amends." But she continued— "If you apologize now, what does that mean for our relationship? Will it be over? Will our shared time just become a good memory and be done with?" Reina straddled his lap, her exposed legs exuding a sensual vibe. "No. I don’t want this to end like this." Reina slowly removed her necklace, placed it in her pocket, along with the ring on her finger. With these actions, he realized what Reina intended to do. She pulled his arm towards herself. "Stop!" He brushed her arms away. Reina remained still for a moment but then sighed as if in resignation. "You stopped me." "Please, I'm begging you. Don't." When he pleaded, Reina sadly lowered her gaze. "...Making a move on me now would make you a bad person, right? A good person wouldn’t do that, I know." Reina tightened her grip on his shoulders. "So, just this once, I want you to be bad, Yuta. Because that would make you the good guy for me." A slight tremble transmitted through her grip. He had already discarded the possibility that Reina might be lying. From the moment he thought she had cheated, he'd viewed all her actions through a particularly dark lens. Now, he chose to trust the year they had spent together. Yet, that trust didn't mean he would respond to her current feelings. "I can't." When he shook his head, Reina blinked slowly, exhaling deeply. "I knew it. For you, it's already a story from the past. You've already moved past me, haven’t you?" Reina moved away from him, taking the soft scent with her. "We just lost each other, like lovers can sometimes. I used to tell myself it was common." Sure, it might be common in relationships. But regardless of how it happened, their relationship had indeed ended. When the spare key was dropped into the mailbox, that marked the end for them. Reina herself knew they had ended it, which was why she was so anxious. "Oh well, seems like it’s too late after all." She stretched and exhaled, and he understood his own feelings. A sense of guilt towards Reina. And the realization that he no longer had romantic feelings for her. What he had told her at the Valentine's party was everything. Given the months that had passed since they broke up, rekindling those feelings was difficult. He had been clear with her that it was over. Thus, he struggled to find the words to offer her. "I'm going to say something different than before. My best option is to try hard to make you fall for me again, Yuta." Reina packed the remaining tea bottle into her handbag. "So maybe this was for the best. I want to work hard so one day I can look back and laugh at how immature I was... and turn this into a positive memory." Saying that, she met his gaze briefly before lowering hers. "So I’ll give it my best, as long as you’ll allow it, Yuta." Reina smiled wistfully. "Yuta, you really don’t need to apologize." "Why not?" After all, it was his fault. He had been the one to sow the seeds of their trouble. Reina looked at the bright full moon, then turned back to him. "Cheating... once you start wondering where it begins, that’s when it’s over. I knew, yet I held your hand. It was definitely cheating then." "I see." "I hurt you, didn’t I? Back then—" "Don’t apologize." He interrupted, and Reina's eyes widened. "My one year and your one day. We'll call it even and pretend it never happened, right?" In his mind, the matter was settled. But that didn’t mean he was severing ties with Reina. They simply put an end to the time they had dated. Where there’s an end, there should be a beginning. Reina lowered her head slightly and spoke softly. "Is that alright?" When he nodded, she gave a gentle smile. "I see. ...I thought it might end with a negative score, but starting from zero isn’t too bad. I’ll keep my feelings close for now." With those words, she distanced herself a little. "Can I call you again?" How long had it been? Since Reina smiled and said goodbye. How long had it been since he could say these words? "Yeah. ...See you." At his response, Reina stood for a moment, nodded deeply, and then left. Exes remain exes, no matter what. The world is full of phrases like going back to being friends or becoming best friends. The essence, however, doesn’t change. But there’s no rule that says being exes means they must sever all ties. As long as both are agreeable, new paths can be opened up. Reina had spoken of balancing things out. —This is our restart. As Reina walked away, the moonlight illuminated her delicate figure.